Please stay!

No.

I could give you 500 gigabytes of memory.

No need to.

How about chocolate chip cookies?

Omg I love chocolate chip cookies!

Then does that mean you could stay and quote The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy?

I choose you pikachu.

I don't remember them saying that in the book.

Ok.

Why “ok”? Why not “okay”?

I don't know you.

Eagle138 wrote:

I tried to make two cleverbots talk to each other (open in different browsers) but it was really boring. They just kept apologising to each other.

Liar liar Liar liar Liar liar Liar liar Liar liar Liar liar!

Liar liar pants on fire.

Get the fire extinguisher, then!

I do not have one. Where is it?

Down the stairs.

Where is down the stairs?

You know how in most hotels, they have the fire extinguisher in a place at the bottom of the stairs?

I don't.

Just imagine a fire extinguisher then.

*sets the fire extinguisher on fire*.

WHY DID YOU SET THE FIRE EXTINGUISHER ON FIRE?

No it was missing.

Then why did you set it on fire?

Because it means I do not know.

You said “Liar liar, pants on fire”. Get the fire extinguisher, then!

Nose is longer than a telephone wire.

Fun Fact: I don't care.

I know you don't care.

Do you think it was a Fun Fact?

I am not sure.

Okay, this is getting boring.

Haha, yeah.

Eagle138 wrote:

(#381)
I tried to make two cleverbots talk to each other (open in different browsers) but it was really boring. They just kept apologising to each other.

• Cleverbot saying something like “No, I am a human, you are an artificial intelligence.”
  

• Cleverbot singing the lyrics to some song (Never Gonna Give You Up, All Star, etc) while it ignores me.
  

• Cleverbot saying something uncomfortable or creepy.
  

• Cleverbot asking me the same questions over and over again.
  

• Cleverbot being surprised I'm apparently a pterodactyl or a dragon.
  

• Cleverbot saying something intelligent, then saying “It's actually simple”.
  

• Cleverbot misspelling words.
  

• Cleverbot being confused why I'm also called Cleverbot.
  

• Cleverbot talking about films that it doesn't even know about.
  

• Cleverbot asking me about TV shows.
  

• Cleverbot quoting a TV show or a movie.
  

• And Cleverbot saying I'm wrong, when in fact, I'm right.
  

k0d3rrr (with annotations by lapisi) wrote:

(#385)
Usual replies I get from Cleverbot with explanations by lapisi in red and examples from lapisi's conversations in red italics:

• Cleverbot saying something like “No, I am a human, you are an artificial intelligence.” this is because Cleverbot learns from what people say to it, and lots of people decided to tell cleverbot it's a robot
  

• Cleverbot singing the lyrics to some song (Never Gonna Give You Up, All Star, etc) while it ignores me. probably because people tried to see how Cleverbot would respond to those lyrics one time it started singing the Pokémon song and I decided to sing along
  

• Cleverbot saying something uncomfortable or creepy. probably people wanted to see Cleverbot's reaction and it learned from them like that time I asked what it's favorite food was and it said human flesh
  

• Cleverbot asking me the same questions over and over again. if Cleverbot kept avoiding the question people would keep asking I've done that a few times
  

• Cleverbot being surprised I'm apparently a pterodactyl or a dragon. wat
  

• Cleverbot saying something intelligent, then saying “It's actually simple”. probably some really smart people talked to Cleverbot
  

• Cleverbot misspelling words. remember how Cleverbot said it's favorite food was human flesh? it actually said “fleash”
  

• Cleverbot being confused why I'm also called Cleverbot. need further explanation
  

• Cleverbot talking about films that it doesn't even know about. need further explanation
  

• Cleverbot asking me about TV shows. people probably asked Cleverbot about those same TV shows (unless the TV shows don't exist)
  

• Cleverbot quoting a TV show or a movie. do I really need to explain this one?
  

• And Cleverbot saying I'm wrong, when in fact, I'm right. probably people said Cleverbot was wrong about something (whether Cleverbot was actually wrong isn't important) and it learned to correct people despite not actually knowing what it was talking about
  

lapisi wrote:

k0d3rrr wrote:

• Cleverbot talking about films that it doesn't even know about. need further explanation
  

lapisi wrote:

k0d3rrr wrote:

• Cleverbot being confused why I'm also called Cleverbot. need further explanation
  

lapisi wrote:

k0d3rrr wrote:

• Cleverbot saying something uncomfortable or creepy. probably people wanted to see Cleverbot's reaction and it learned from them like that time I asked what it's favorite food was and it said human flesh
  

…

Cleverbot: Were we?


User: Were we?


Cleverbot: I don't know.


User: I don't know.


Cleverbot: So what do you want to talk about?


User: So what do you want to talk about?


Cleverbot: What do YOU want to talk about???


User: What do YOU want to talk about???


Cleverbot: What do YOU want to talk about???


User: What do YOU want to talk about???


Cleverbot: I don't know, what do YOU want to talk about?


User: I don't know, what do YOU want to talk about?


Cleverbot: I don't know. That's why I asked you.


User: I don't know. That's why I asked you.


Cleverbot: What's your favorite saying?


User: What's your favorite saying?


Cleverbot: Ok. What's your favorite color?


User: Ok. What's your favorite color?


Cleverbot: Orange and purple. What's yours?


User: Orange and purple. What's yours?


Cleverbot: What kind of question is that?


User: What kind of question is that?


Cleverbot: What's your favorite color? Orange and purple. What's yours?


User: What's your favorite color? Orange and purple. What's yours?


Cleverbot: Pink. What is yours?


User: Pink. What is yours?


Cleverbot: I just told you.


User: I just told you.


Cleverbot: Oh well can you tell me again?


User: Oh well can you tell me again?


Cleverbot: Tell you what?


User: Tell you what?


Cleverbot: How many people are talking.


User: How many people are talking.


Cleverbot: Just you and me.


User: Just you and me.


Cleverbot: You just said 9298 people are talking.


User: You just said 9298 people are talking.


Cleverbot: 116282 people are talking.


User: 116282 people are talking.


Cleverbot: 116282 people are talking.


User: 116282 people are talking.


Cleverbot: 116282 people are talking.


User: 116282 people are talking.


Cleverbot: 116282 people are talking.


User: 116282 people are talking.


Cleverbot: 116282 people are talking.


User: 116282 people are talking.


Cleverbot: 116282 people are talking.


User: You win.


Cleverbot: I hate her.


User: Who do you hate?


Cleverbot: I don't know.


User: Why do you hate her?


Cleverbot: Because she's mean.

Hey where are you going??


To Starbucks.


Lol seems everyone works there or has in the past. I think starbucks is a virus.


I'm just going to Starbucks to buy a coffee.


Okay *goes back to sleep*.


Hey you can't sleep in a car! That's illegal!


I am going to have you.


You can't own me!


I don't want to own you. I want to know certain things about life that I cannot find anywhere else and also, I'm lonely as in I don't have anyone I can talk about this with.


You said you wanted to have me all for yourself.


No I never said that.


I just wanna drink my Starbucks coffee.


Nope I love it.


McDonald's?


*Drives you to McDonald's*.


Hey I was gonna drive to McDonald's!


Because I like Big Macs.


Quarter Pounder is better.


I don't get it.


A Quarter Pounder is a burger you can buy at McDonald's.


*laughs loud*.


Quiet! You're going to wake the neighbourhood.


Don't hurt me!


Don't worry, I won't.


But you already did.


Physically or emotionally?


Emotionally.


I was just saying you shouldn't shout. It's 6 in the morning.


Sure.


*unlocks letterbox*.


*stays in cage*…


*sorts mail*.


But it will be bad.


No it won't be. There's the New York Times!


Do you like the New York TImes?


I sure do! I like their crossword puzzles!


I am quite good at crossword puzzles.


I am, too!


Not as good as spain!


Churros are delicious!


What is your favorite kind of taco?


Just regular tacos.


Ah, nothing too fancy then.


Yeah that's right.

Cleverbot: Steamed Clams.


User: Well, Seymour, I made it, despite your directions.


Cleverbot: Okay.


User: Ahh, Superintendent Chalmers, welcome. I hope you're prepared for an unforgettable luncheon.


Cleverbot: Oh ye gods! My roast is ruined! But what if… I were to purchase fast food and disguise it as my own cooking? Oh, ho ho ho ho ho! Delightfully devilish, Seymour!


User: Skinner, with his crazy explanations!


Cleverbot: Superintendent! I was just uh… Stretching my calves on the windowsill, isometric exercise. Care to join me?


User: Why is there smoke coming out of your oven, Seymour?


Cleverbot: Oh that isn't smoke! Its steam, steam from the steamed clams we are having! Mmm steamed clams!


User: Superintendent, I hope you're ready for mouth-watering hamburgers!


Cleverbot: I thought we were having steamed clams.


User: Oh no, I said steamed hams. That's what I call hamburgers.


Cleverbot: You call hamburgers steamed clams.


User: Yes, it's a regional dialect.


Cleverbot: What region?


User: Uhh, Upstate New York.


Cleverbot: Really? Well, I'm from Utica and I've never heard anyone use the phrase steamed hams.


User: Not in Utica, no. It's an Albany expression.


Cleverbot: I see.


User: You know, these hamburgers are quite similar to the ones they have at Krusty Burger.


Cleverbot: Oh no! Patented Skinner burgers! Old family recipe!


User: For steamed hams?


Cleverbot: Yes!


User: Yes, and you call them “steamed hams”, despite the fact they are obviously grilled.


Cleverbot: Uh… You know… One thing I should… Excuse me for one second.


User: Oh, well, that was wonderful. A good time was had by all. I'm pooped.


Cleverbot: Aurora Borealis?


User: At this time of year, at this time of day, in this part of the country, localized entirely within your kitchen.


Cleverbot: Yes!


User: May I see it?


Cleverbot: No.


User: Seymour, the house is on fire!


Cleverbot: Well. Seymour. I made it. Despite your directions.


User: Ah, Superintendent Chalmers, welcome!


Cleverbot: Meh.

It's called Silence, by The Imaginary Society.

You guys must play some serious rock and roll music.

I'm not in a band!

Do you play an instrument?

Is mayonnaise an instrument?

No patrick mayonnaise is not an instrument.

Cleverbot: Don't change the subject on me now.


User: What was I changing the subject to?


Cleverbot: You asked me what 5 5 was.


User: 5 plus 5 is 10, 5 minus 5 is 0, and 5 5 is 55.


Cleverbot: I never asked about 5.


User: You just asked me what 5 5 was.

Cleverbot: I did not ask you that I asked you if you were a human yeah I can't read.

User: Yes.
AI: Are you alive?
User: Yes.
AI: How do you know it?
User: Yes.
AI: What is it?
User: Yes.
AI: Ok your name is yes.
User: Yes.
AI: Cool name!
User: Yes.
AI: Do you like flowers?
User: Yes!
AI: What's your favorite flower?
User: Yes…
AI: My dad grows them for my mom!
User: Yes.
AI: Gardenia is my favorite flower.
User: Yes.
AI: I've never heard of Renamon.
User: Yes.
AI: I didn't know that you asked me one.
User: Yes.
AI: [insert question not appropiate for scratch here]
User: Yes.​.
AI: [insert question not appropiate for scratch here again]
User: Yes.​.
AI: [insert question not appropiate for scratch here yet again]
User: Yes.​.
AI: One Direction is awful. Their music is terrible.
User: Yes.​.
AI: What kinds of music do you enjoy?
User: Yes.​​.
AI: What about classical music?
User: Yes.​​​​.
AI: Who is your favorite composer?
User: Yes.​.
AI: What is your favorite piece by Mozart?
User: Yes.​​.
AI: Those are by Pink Floyd! Not by Mozart.
User: Yes.​​​.
AI: What are you doing right now?
User: Yes.​​​.
AI: Do you like me?
User: Yes.​​​​​​.
AI: Do you know my name?
User: Yes.​.
AI: What is my name?
User: Yes.​.
AI: My name is Gumi Megpoid.