What are some funny programming/mathematical jokes?

scratchieguy12345678

Raihan142857 wrote:

fdreerf wrote:
-snip-

programming in c is lame, real gamers code in asm
Hello world

global main
section .text
extern printf
main:
  mov        rsi, message          ; sets parameters to print
  mov        rdi, fmt
  sub        rsp, 8
  call       printf                ; calls printf
  add        rsp, 8 
  mov        rbx, 0                ; exit status 0
  mov        rax, 1
  int 0x80                         ; make a request to the os kernel
  ret                              ; return
section .data                      ;
  message: db "Hello, World!", 10, 0
  fmt: db "%s", 0

Nah, real coders program in Malbolge.

(=<`#9]~6ZY327Uv4-QsqpMn&+Ij"'E%e{Ab~w=_:]Kw%o44Uqp0/Q?xNvL:`H%c#DD2^WV>gY;dts76qKJImZkj

Last edited by scratchieguy12345678 (May 11, 2021 03:07:32)

Vaibhs11

scratchieguy12345678 wrote:

Raihan142857 wrote:

fdreerf wrote:
-snip-

programming in c is lame, real gamers code in asm
Hello world

global main
section .text
extern printf
main:
  mov        rsi, message          ; sets parameters to print
  mov        rdi, fmt
  sub        rsp, 8
  call       printf                ; calls printf
  add        rsp, 8 
  mov        rbx, 0                ; exit status 0
  mov        rax, 1
  int 0x80                         ; make a request to the os kernel
  ret                              ; return
section .data                      ;
  message: db "Hello, World!", 10, 0
  fmt: db "%s", 0

Nah, real coders program in Malbolge.

(=<`#9]~6ZY327Uv4-QsqpMn&+Ij"'E%e{Ab~w=_:]Kw%o44Uqp0/Q?xNvL:`H%c#DD2^WV>gY;dts76qKJImZkj

ahem.

,>,------------------------------------------------<------------------------------------------------[->+<]>++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++.

Last edited by Vaibhs11 (May 11, 2021 14:57:01)

PkmnQ

scratchieguy12345678 wrote:

Raihan142857 wrote:

fdreerf wrote:
-snip-

programming in c is lame, real gamers code in asm
Hello world

global main
section .text
extern printf
main:
  mov        rsi, message          ; sets parameters to print
  mov        rdi, fmt
  sub        rsp, 8
  call       printf                ; calls printf
  add        rsp, 8 
  mov        rbx, 0                ; exit status 0
  mov        rax, 1
  int 0x80                         ; make a request to the os kernel
  ret                              ; return
section .data                      ;
  message: db "Hello, World!", 10, 0
  fmt: db "%s", 0

Nah, real coders program in Malbolge.

(=<`#9]~6ZY327Uv4-QsqpMn&+Ij"'E%e{Ab~w=_:]Kw%o44Uqp0/Q?xNvL:`H%c#DD2^WV>gY;dts76qKJImZkj

You don't even use the unshackled variation? Man, you're such a beginner.

This is an account that exists.

Here, have a useful link:

The Official List of Rejected Suggestions by Za-Chary

6d66yh

Raihan142857 wrote:
fdreerf wrote:
-snip-
programming in c is lame, real gamers code in asm
extern printf

You're supposed to write your own text renderer

Integer arithmetic suggestion: https://scratch.mit.edu/discuss/post/5163608/

Raihan142857

6d66yh wrote:
Raihan142857 wrote:
fdreerf wrote:
-snip-
programming in c is lame, real gamers code in asm
extern printf
You're supposed to write your own text renderer

no printf is superior

I use scratch.
GF: I'll dump you. BF: hex dump or binary dump?

gosoccerboy5

Javascript be like:

Wait, it's all in a “with (window)” statement?
Always has been

6d66yh

Raihan142857 wrote:
6d66yh wrote:
Raihan142857 wrote:
fdreerf wrote:
-snip-
programming in c is lame, real gamers code in asm
extern printf
You're supposed to write your own text renderer
no printf is superior

Why

Integer arithmetic suggestion: https://scratch.mit.edu/discuss/post/5163608/

Jonathan50

6d66yh wrote:
Why

Because it writes to file descriptor 1.

Not yet a Knight of the Mu Calculus.

Raihan142857

Jonathan50 wrote:
6d66yh wrote:
Why
Because it writes to file descriptor 1.

it's also not a pain to print numbers in decimal (especially floats)

I use scratch.
GF: I'll dump you. BF: hex dump or binary dump?

6d66yh

Raihan142857 wrote:
Jonathan50 wrote:
6d66yh wrote:
Why
Because it writes to file descriptor 1.
it's also not a pain to print numbers in decimal (especially floats)

Use standard functions to convert numbers to decimal strings, then render the text manually.

Integer arithmetic suggestion: https://scratch.mit.edu/discuss/post/5163608/

Raihan142857

6d66yh wrote:
Raihan142857 wrote:
Jonathan50 wrote:
6d66yh wrote:
Why
Because it writes to file descriptor 1.
it's also not a pain to print numbers in decimal (especially floats)
Use standard functions to convert numbers to decimal strings, then render the text manually.

Isn't that just as much cheating as using printf?

I use scratch.
GF: I'll dump you. BF: hex dump or binary dump?

6d66yh

Raihan142857 wrote:
6d66yh wrote:
Raihan142857 wrote:
Jonathan50 wrote:
6d66yh wrote:
Why
Because it writes to file descriptor 1.
it's also not a pain to print numbers in decimal (especially floats)
Use standard functions to convert numbers to decimal strings, then render the text manually.
Isn't that just as much cheating as using printf?

The point is that printf uses the system rendering library in a god knows what is the terminal/commandprompt environment is like. With the renderer being included in the application, they can control the render specifics and its quality.

Integer arithmetic suggestion: https://scratch.mit.edu/discuss/post/5163608/

Raihan142857

6d66yh wrote:
Raihan142857 wrote:
6d66yh wrote:
Raihan142857 wrote:
Jonathan50 wrote:
6d66yh wrote:
Why
Because it writes to file descriptor 1.
it's also not a pain to print numbers in decimal (especially floats)
Use standard functions to convert numbers to decimal strings, then render the text manually.
Isn't that just as much cheating as using printf?
The point is that printf uses the system rendering library in a god knows what is the terminal/commandprompt environment is like. With the renderer being included in the application, they can control the render specifics and its quality.

By renderer, you are implying that the text will actually be rendered on screen? Not sure if there are any graphics libraries for asm

.

I use scratch.
GF: I'll dump you. BF: hex dump or binary dump?

Greg8128

Raihan142857 wrote:
By renderer, you are implying that the text will actually be rendered on screen? Not sure if there are any graphics libraries for asm.

You just change the data for each pixel individually

My best projects:

Raihan142857

Greg8128 wrote:
Raihan142857 wrote:
By renderer, you are implying that the text will actually be rendered on screen? Not sure if there are any graphics libraries for asm.
You just change the data for each pixel individually

yes, easy peasy

. I'll just stick with printf.

I use scratch.
GF: I'll dump you. BF: hex dump or binary dump?

Jonathan50

Raihan142857 wrote:
By renderer, you are implying that the text will actually be rendered on screen? Not sure if there are any graphics libraries for asm .

You can use any library that can be used from C in assembly. But, obviously real game developers write at least two dozen different versions of their game, one for each platform. Writing for Unix (which might just as well be done in C anyway) isn't very interesting since you don't sell games to time-sharing users or people with workstations.

If your program is for solely text, without graphics, it makes sense to write to stdout or use text mode. In this case, for a PC, you can use MS-DOS system call 09h. (Official system call reference here. Notice 100% legit commit date. Microsoft used Git before it was cool, I mean, when its author Linus Torvalds was 13, a bit over two decades before…wait…) Writing to stdout has the virtue you can use the program over a serial cable/ssh/telnet or redirect its output. Otherwise 6d66yh is right. For a PC, you will do graphics by accessing the memory of the video adapter.

Last edited by Jonathan50 (May 20, 2021 07:17:21)

Not yet a Knight of the Mu Calculus.

Maximouse

I think this topic actually belongs in TIMaC.

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Vaibhs11

Maximouse wrote:
I think this topic actually belongs in TIMaC.

It hAs bEeN HeRe fOr fIvE YeArS

gosoccerboy5

Maximouse wrote:
I think this topic actually belongs in TIMaC.

Remember, back in the day you were allowed to support for no reason

scratchieguy12345678

gosoccerboy5 wrote:
Maximouse wrote:
I think this topic actually belongs in TIMaC.
Remember, back in the day you were allowed to support for no reason

Yeah, people were so unconstructive in the past.

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