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*warning: mention of loss + death

Betrayal's Words ☾ Chapter 1

Dad always told me love was not at first sight.

I guess what he always says is true. Dad married Mom, and guess where she is now? That's right. Gone. She left with half of our money three years ago, insisting that she didn't belong with us and we didn't deserve her. I was thirteen at that time. I never really liked Mom, so it was easy for me to see her leave. She was a gold digger, anyway. And I mean—who likes gold diggers? But Dad . . . Dad loved her.

He cried all night since then. It's gotten a bit better since we planned to move to California, but sometimes I still hear his faint whimpering in the middle of the night, crying for the woman he lost, the woman he loved so dearly.

I think that's why we left Utah. So we wouldn't be reminded of our past, where betrayal's words had smacked us right there in the face.

☁ - - - - - - - - - -

I hadn't been happy about moving.

Dad was, of course. He was an adventurous man. But I had been happy where we were before, where all my friends were. Now I'll never see them again. The thought is so daunting that even Dad's smiles and laughter don't cheer me up.

“Come on, Emi,” he tells me in the plane as he catches me gazing at the clouds, daydreaming once again. “Wanna play a board game? Chess? Parcheesi? I brought all of you favorites.”

I turn my head and our eyes meet. “Not now, Dad,” I mumble. He'd been asking me this question for a while now. Why the hell does he think my answer will change?

Dad frowns. “What's wrong, Emika?” he asks, using my real name this time. “Are you sick? Is everything going to be alright?”

I bite back a rude retort. (You think everything is alright? This is what you want Dad, not want I want, so don't you dare ask if I'm okay or not, because I will never be okay after we arrive in frickin' California. “I'm just . . . thinking,” I rephrase. “Of what we're leaving behind.”

Dad's eyes soften, and I suddenly wonder how I could be so annoyed at such gentle eyes of his. “You know why we're leaving, right?” he asks quietly. “It's a selfish reason, I know. But you understand why I want to leave where Rose . . . you know?”

He doesn't even have the guts to say what happened, what she did to him, I think sadly. But I just give him a small nod of my head. “I know,” I say. “It's just hard. Leaving my friends behind.” I shrug like it's no big deal, but it is. Because I would never see my friends ever again, because Dad wouldn't ever buy us a trip back to Utah. Never in his lifetime, because that was the place where all of it (as Dad called it) happened.

“Hey,” Dad says. He puts his hand on my chin and lifts it higher. “Do you need a few math problems to solve? To keep your mind off things?” He winks, and I smile a little.

Math was my thing. I could solve the average problems in a split second. Dad always called me his little mathematician—and it made sense. My Dad was an engineer and did math in his everyday life. When I was having a hard time, we made a Kahoot that included lots of math equations and then set the time limit to ten seconds. And we had to solve a really hard problem in our heads in less than ten seconds. It was challenging, and we barely got the questions right, but at least it was fun and occupying. Occupying as taking my mind off things.

It worked for Dad too. Taking his mind off of her. It would help heal the crack in his heart just a little. So the bleed would stop just a tiny bit and we could focus on what was happening in the present instead of the horrors of our past.

I laugh. “Sure, Dad,” I say. Then, in a more quiet tone, I add, “Thanks.”

He blinks, then grins and pulls out his phone. We start making the Kahoot and when we’re finished, we start doing the math problems. Algebra, geometry, and a bunch of other stuff all in one. It was hard.


But it was healing our cracked hearts . . . So in a very weird way, it was relaxing.

And soon the plane landed, and I was laughing with Dad again like I always did.

Like I did before it happened and before we moved.

☁ - - - - - - - - - -

We arrived in California a few hours later. Dad gets our luggage and grins at me sheepishly.

“Em, aren’t you just a little excited that we get a new apartment and everything? We get to see it today and put all our stuff in it.”

I shrug. “Yeah, I guess it’s—” I hesitated. “I guess it’s a little bit exciting.”

Dad’s lips twitched. “A little bit?” he asks. “This apartment will be a lot nicer than our old one. Trust me.” He winks. “I picked it out myself.”

I smile, but I quietly think, A lot nicer than our old one? He must be trying to tell me that our future will be a lot brighter than our past. I shake my head. Maybe for him, but never for me. My past was great, with an endless amount of friends.

I should be happy for him, but I’m not. I just want to go back in time when both Dad and I were happy. When my mom wasn’t a stupid gold digger when she didn’t leave us to fend for ourselves.

We took a Lyft driver to our new apartment. Dad said he’d get a car soon (Mom took our car too when she left) but for now, we just had to pay for buses and drivers. I hope that he gets a car soon. For some reason, Lyft drivers always make me nervous.

We arrived, and we quickly unpacked our suitcases. Dad bowed his head in thanks to the driver, and soon we were hurrying up the elevator. Dad was excited to see our apartment, while I just wanted to get some rest. My first day of school was tomorrow, after all.

I shiver. My first day in my new school.
“Hey, Emi, calm down,” Dad says, exasperated. “Come on. Stop worrying. Everything will be fine. Everything will be great!”

“I wish I had as much optimism as you, Dad,” I mumble. Dad laughs, and the corners of my lips twitch. When Dad laughs, he lights up a room, no matter if whatever he’s laughing at is funny or not. I don’t know how he does it, he’s just really charming I guess.

When we reach our room, Dad grabs my wrist and yanks me inside. And I have to admit, this apartment is much nicer than our old one.

The scent is different. Cleaner. And the apartment itself is very . . . White. Literally. There’s white everywhere.

White cushions. White chairs. A white chandelier. The only thing that doesn’t seem white is the frickin’ TV. Everything else is a little bit too clean for me. At least Dad likes it.

“Like it, eh?” he asks as he nudges me playfully. I smile widely so he thinks I’m pleased, but deep down inside, I’m not. I just want to go back home.

I swear, my new least favorite color is white.

I really really hope that my room isn’t like this.

We explore the rest of the apartment. My room is okay. Dad gave me a room with a large bathroom and a giant closet where I can hang all my clothes. And when we unpack my mattress and put it on the bed, it feels pretty comfortable.

“Next, we just need to put all of your posters and your LED lights and stuff like that. And your desk. And your room will be complete!” Dad says excitedly.

“Dad,” I say quietly. “Why don’t you go unpack your stuff and head to bed? It’s been a long night . . . And, uh, I want to go to bed, too. The first day of school tomorrow, you know?”

“Yeah, you’re right,” Dad says, his excitement wearing down. “Well, wake up early tomorrow, kiddo. We gotta get all your stationary and school supplies out, right? And your bag.” He winks. “You were all excited about getting a new one, yeah? Maybe we can go shopping together tomorrow while you tell me how school was. And we can buy so much cool stuff. We need to go grocery shopping anyway, so that would be fun—”

“Dad,” I interrupt. “Let’s focus on finishing today before we start planning tomorrow, okay? Seriously. We can talk about all this cool stuff tomorrow morning, but now—” I yawn right on cue, and Dad laughs.

“Hah. You’re right, Em. Well, sleep tight.” He smiles. “You don’t have to brush your teeth tonight. We don’t have that stuff unpacked yet, so . . .” His voice trails off. “Maybe I can get that unpacked tonight . . .”

I raise my eyebrows. “No, Dad,” I insist. “You are going to bed right now. You have that job interview tomorrow, right? You gotta look good for that.”

He sighs. “Right on again kiddo,” he says with a smile. “Don’t worry about me, Emika. I’m going to bed right now. It has been a long day.” He kisses me on the cheek and whispers, “Goodnight, Emi. Thank you for everything.”

I blink in surprise, bewildered. What do you mean? But before I can ask, he leaves. I shut my curtains as quietly as I can (in my room, one of the walls is glass so I have a pretty cool view) and climb into bed. I want to read right now, but my stuff isn’t unpacked yet, so I just lie in bed, staring up at the ceiling, wondering if I’ll be able to fall asleep tonight.

I wonder what Mia and Gale and Michael and Noah are doing, I think quietly. Probably having a sleepover without me. I wonder if they’re thinking about me, just like how I’m thinking about them now.

Suddenly, I start to cry. For once in my life, I don’t think about Dad or stay outside his door until I hear his soft snores echoing through the hallway. For once in my life, I think about myself and how miserable my future is going to be.

I cry for the great friends I lost. I cry for Utah and how much I want to go back. I cry and cry and cry until my eyes can’t get any more puffy; I cry until my sheets are soaking wet.

Because even if Dad is happy, I’ll never be.

Even if Dad’s heart stops bleeding, my heart will just bleed more and more, until it has no more blood to bleed. Even if Dad’s heart begins to heal, mine will just crack further and further until it splits into two pieces.

Even if Dad smiles at me for a million years, I might not ever smile a real smile back.



end.


author's note:

thank you so much for reading. Remember, if you want to show support for this story, please check it out in project form here: https://scratch.mit.edu/projects/873519059/ (and heart and star if you liked it!) <3

goodbye, thank you for reading this story! and please, keep watch for Chapter 2 - i'm working on it day by day!


love,
sunny (@-Sunmeadow-)

hello! I wanted to say I really enjoyed this chapter and I’m exited for the next one! And I also had one question (not related to the chapter this is just out of curiosity); how did you make the forum? I tried to look it up but it didn’t say anything helpful…. Welp, I rlly enjoyed this chapter, I love loads of your projects! Bye bye { ps; I liked how the chapter was quite emotional :3 }

hello! I wanted to say I really enjoyed this chapter and I’m exited for the next one! And I also had one question (not related to the chapter this is just out of curiosity); how did you make the forum? I tried to look it up but it didn’t say anything helpful…. Welp, I rlly enjoyed this chapter, I love loads of your projects! Bye bye { ps; I liked how the chapter was quite emotional :3 }

awww thank you so much, this means a lot to me! <3 And to do a forum like this, go to the main form page (scroll down and look for the link that says “community forms”, and find the topic that you want to post on. Click the link, and there should be a blue button near the top right corner that says “add topic” or something like that! Click it and a little type bubble will appear - and that's basically all. If that didn't help, i'm sure there's a tutorial or something on Scratch.

And thank you again! It means so much that you're commenting on a lot of my work and giving your feedback. I really appreciate it.

hello! I wanted to say I really enjoyed this chapter and I’m exited for the next one! And I also had one question (not related to the chapter this is just out of curiosity); how did you make the forum? I tried to look it up but it didn’t say anything helpful…. Welp, I rlly enjoyed this chapter, I love loads of your projects! Bye bye { ps; I liked how the chapter was quite emotional :3 }

awww thank you so much, this means a lot to me! <3 And to do a forum like this, go to the main form page (scroll down and look for the link that says “community forms”, and find the topic that you want to post on. Click the link, and there should be a blue button near the top right corner that says “add topic” or something like that! Click it and a little type bubble will appear - and that's basically all. If that didn't help, i'm sure there's a tutorial or something on Scratch.

And thank you again! It means so much that you're commenting on a lot of my work and giving your feedback. I really appreciate it.


Okay I didn’t know how to reply so yeahhh. Well; Np and thx for telling me! I really love interacting w/ ppl when I feel lonely and you have a lot of cool/interesting projects and your nice so i love talking!

By the way call me Bee if you want! (●´ω｀●)

BR_3040 wrote:

hello! I wanted to say I really enjoyed this chapter and I’m exited for the next one! And I also had one question (not related to the chapter this is just out of curiosity); how did you make the forum? I tried to look it up but it didn’t say anything helpful…. Welp, I rlly enjoyed this chapter, I love loads of your projects! Bye bye { ps; I liked how the chapter was quite emotional :3 }

awww thank you so much, this means a lot to me! <3 And to do a forum like this, go to the main form page (scroll down and look for the link that says “community forms”, and find the topic that you want to post on. Click the link, and there should be a blue button near the top right corner that says “add topic” or something like that! Click it and a little type bubble will appear - and that's basically all. If that didn't help, i'm sure there's a tutorial or something on Scratch.

And thank you again! It means so much that you're commenting on a lot of my work and giving your feedback. I really appreciate it.


Okay I didn’t know how to reply so yeahhh. Well; Np and thx for telling me! I really love interacting w/ ppl when I feel lonely and you have a lot of cool/interesting projects and your nice so i love talking!

By the way call me Bee if you want! (●´ω｀●)

<3 Okay! And also, to reply, click the quote button in the bottom right corner of a post. (and then just write your reply normally.) And thank you again! Talking to you is fun as well. ^^