First part of fourth weekly of July 2023 Session.
My prompt is– “ The London Bridge is falling down, falling down, falling down”

Now, My First Verse:
The London Bridge is Building up, Building up,
Oh my Britain,
If the Bridge is Building up, Building up,
I can go to the yellow wood.
The London Bridge is Building Up, Build Up,
Oh my Britain

Second Part of Fourth Weekly–
The Prompt that I chose is– The Future is of new Culinary Possibilities! So now I have to write at least 400 words on the food you might find at the diner of the distant future of the Galaxswc.
And the Era that the prompt is obviously The Distant Future era so without Further ado, Let us see some New Culinary Possibilities:
Well, I have honestly always wanted a really healthy and mouth-watering dish so I would tell you that the distant future era had healthy and tasty diner. It had the infamous Ice-cream Samosas. So to understand the delicacy of the dish, You have to know what ice-cream and samosa is. Ice-cream needs no separate introduction as we know it is a dessert mainly made with milk and is frozen and on the other hand, Samosa is a hot food and is in a triangular shape and is widely eaten in the Southern Part of India and has a stuffing which is usually Potato( or like the locals call it Aloo Samosa) and corn samosa also. So now back to the distant future era, Now this ice-cream Samosa, had Ice-cream as stuffing instead of Potato( Aloo) or corn. And you know what is the best thing about this Ice-cream Samosa, It is healthy. How can I say that Ice-cream is healthy, and well, here come a twist in the tale of this culinary delicacy, the ice cream is still made with milk but vegetables and fruits are used as key ingredients in this and enhance the nutrient value of the ice-cream Samosa. Also, In the distant Future, A Variety and new way was invented wherein, A Fridge is not required to fridge the ice-cream and a device comes which does make ice-cream without reducing the nutrient value but does reduce only one percent only but we can't say every device is perfect. Also, To make the Samosa Healthy, Instead of using Maida or Whole purpose flour which consists of to much amount of fat, We use the Galax flour which is a type of flour and acts like a substitute to Maida
( Whole Purpose Flour) and also it doesn't consist of much amount of fat in it. And you may ask me what about frying the samosa, well we don't fry to begin with and the distant future folk, actually steam and boil it again by using a special device called the Galaxine. Now we have seen the most Popular Culinary Dish and Delicacy in the Distant future era which is The Ice-Cream Samosa.

Part 3 of Weekly-Present day
Some Where ages and ages hence,
Two roads diverged in a wood,
I chose one road,
Two roads diverged in a wood,
Because it wanted wear,
Tow roads diverged in wood,
I doubt if I should ever come back.

Part 4 of weekly–Current Day
Butterfly Effect.
So I am going to add this writing piece as a bonus chapter to the novel that I am currently on so the novel name is, ‘The mist-The Eternal Fog’ so I'm first just going to give you a brief of the characters– The mist was made up of 4 members, Carmi-The leader and a super stealth spy, Davian- The Hacker, Rose- The Doctor, Hawk- A Robotics engineer and a weirdo who wanted to be a spy and so spy in training. So hang on to your stomach and try not to laugh too hard as this Chapter is going to be a funny and hilarious one.

A Disastrous Christmas–
So in a week Christmas eve was approaching and the mist had to give gifts to each other and played the game secret Santa. Carmi got rose, Davian got Hawk, Rose got Davian and Hawk got Carmi. They were all in a dilemma to what to give as a present or a gift to one and other. Each one wanted to give the other a really special gift as the group of four had each other during the hard times and when they were first attacked my the unknown. As we know that each of them specialized in a particular thing so they first thought of using their Skills to prepare the present for the other.

Carmi is the leader and a super stealth spy so she thought of presenting Rose with a Special Spy Equipment as Rose always longed of being a Spy just for a day to get that feeling and experience. Then Carmi went back to her drawing board and came up with an excellent idea, She thought of designing a A stealth suit for her with roses on them but not too bright or dazzling as after all it is a spy suit not a fancy gala dress.

Davian is a Hacker so he also thought of keeping his skills to use. So he prepared a very sophisticated micro chip which Hawk can keep in the Robot he is working on and complete the Software program of it.

Rose was a Doctor and so she knew that Davian always was exhausted after a series of Hacking which they had to do now a days a lot because of the increasing robberies across town so She developed a tasty juice which Davian can enjoy while hacking and staying Energetic later.

Hawk got Carmi so Hawk already knew that Carmi always wanted a new spy weapon so he developed a spy hair brush which could help her climb walls, talk to the team and you know the best part she can fool her enemies.

They Kept all their presents in the HQ and left for dinner but when they returned their presents were burned to ashes and they knew the person who did it–the unknown.

Carmi who was the Boldest person in the Mist just broke out in tears as she didn't want this butterfly impact anymore so she proposed a way to fix this.

She said Christmas is cheering and being together so Hawk and Davian Set up a Movie screen and set up all the movies that they liked while Rose and Carmi made some snacks.

It was perfect and this is how the Mist made a Disastrous Christmas into a memorable Christmas.

Weekly–Part 5–Distant Past
Chorus
My white lies pushing up daisies,
The daisies are withering in the garden,
Withering in the garden.
The Innocence is lost.
All hope is lost
All hope is lost.

My white lies pushing up daisies,
The Daisies are waking up
waking up
The Innocence is Woken
All hope is retrieved
All hope is retrieved

Sixth Part Of the Weekly–Distant Past–A Mini-Tragic Story
Have you ever heard the Tragedy of the Baudelaire? Well, this tragedy is more tragic of those three orphans.
(Based On My Ongoing History Lesson–Colonial Agrarian Policies, Though the Characters in this Writing piece are made up and is completely Fictional )

To begin with there was town in Bengal( A rich Province in India) which faced a huge famine in 1770 CE due to growth of only Indigo cash crop which was forced by the EEIC (English East India Company) and they were bound to do this due to the Permanent Settlement policy.

In Bengal, there was a young boy with the name Dev who was around ten years and was a tweeb. He had a curious mind which made him question the Authority of the English East India Company. When the workers were working vigorously regardless to the ongoing famine. The British Official Sir Arthur arrived at the Factory and saw that the labor and the peasants productivity was relatively less than the productivity of last year.

Sir Arthur Started yelling at the poor peasants who were already tired and were starving with hunger. Then a voice spoke out that dazzled the entire crowd, “Can I propose a Solution?” and this voice belonged to Dev. Sir Arthur was astonished and asked him to continue. Dev proposed that the peasants were staring and were craving for food and if the peasants are given what they want then they can increase their productivity and after all trade is based on the economic theory of mercantilism.

Sir Arthur yelled at Dev, “ You are just another poor little slave and your job is to work for the Great Britain and serve me” and said this with a smug smirk on his face. Dev said in a really low voice, “ Sorry Sir, I didn't mean to and I just..” Before he could complete his Sentence he was pushed to the ground by Sir Arthur and then he yelled once again, “ You can't back answer me and now get back to what yo were doing and everyone the Indigo Production won't do on its own”

Dev was just a kid and had already suffered trauma because of Sir Arthur. He Captured Dev's Parents and sent them to prison for starting the Blue Revolution and now he don't know where his parents are and he feels like an Orphan. He is all lonely in the factory and no one dared to be his friend for one reason– Sir Arthur forbade anyone to talk to him and if anyone talks to him or helps him then they would be seriously punished.

The Next day, When Dev woke up he saw Dev's parents by his side who said that Sir Arthur has bailed them put of prison which left Dev in a surprised state and also he heard that Sir Arthur listened to Dev's Advice and did some advancements in the Factory so Sir Arthur wasn't that bad after all.

Seventh Part of Weekly–Bridge–Ancient Past
Title of the Song– I can see you- Taylor Swift

Oh you can see me huh,
So what?
I can see you
So what?

Oh Things aren't what they seem,
The world is evil
I can see you
but the world is evil

Oh the green wood in spring,
The yellow wood in Autumn,
I can see you,
But the yellow wood in Autumn is what which makes a difference.

Part Eight of Weekly–Ancient Times Era
So this Writing piece is again going to be a bonus chapter in the novel I am Working on–The Mist-The Eternal Fog so a short overview of it before we dive into the story:
The mist was made up of 4 members, Carmi-The leader and a super stealth spy, Davian- The Hacker, Rose- The Doctor, Hawk- A Robotics engineer and a weirdo who wanted to be a spy and so spy in training.
The mist Had their Meeting point–The Shop. It was actually like the head quarters of the Mist, It consisted of a main place to discuss, A lab for Rose, A workshop for Hawk, A Techy room for Davian and a Training room for Carmi.

An Unforgettable Faith.
The Mist were sitting in the Shop and were in their respective places and were inventing and practicing for the day when the Unknown might given an another appearance especially their before encounter didn't go to their plan and the unknown had the upper hand.

Carmi was really worried and depressed about it so she Called on a meeting and they all met at the Shop's Main place. Carmi started the discussion. She said, “ We should hatch a plan before the Unknown does another appearance.” The other three member seem to agree with this. So they all sat and began hatching a plan.

After an hour of serious planning session, Here was their plan:

Carmi would stealthily sneak into the Unknown's Cabin and then grab the vase( It is just a code name and actually inside the vase there is a cure for a deadly disease which no one knows as no one had it for long to crack the secret code to open it) from there.

Davian's job was to disable the cameras and security things because they didn't want he Unknown to find about it.

Rose's job was to make a special type of gas so that when it is released she can spot the vase and this is because only the vase can react with that vase and for a red signal thingy.

Hawk's job was to prepare a special type of glove that can spot if anyone is talking and make sure that everyone can communicate with each other during the mission.

When the mission started, Their plan started to going downhill. First the device that Hawk prepared wasn't working as if something was blocking it, Rose's gas container was out of gas as if it has already been released, Carmi was caught and Davian though he disabled all security things but still he was caught hacking.

Now when they all were taken to the prison's cell in the Unknown's place. they all didn't know what to do and lost all hope and just left it to their fate. now the question is, “ Can their Fate Save them and well it depends on God's Grace.”

Chorus–The End–Ninth Part of Weekly Four:

The Silent Nature
The Nature is Silent,
Doing the best for its children,
Doing the best for its children,
I have no wish but to,
Meet nature one day
one day.

If only I realized,
Nature is with us
In our journey
Nature is with us.

Part Ten Of the Fourth Weekly:
I had a good night sleep and when I woke up in the morning, I saw the doom. Well, not doom doom but I saw blue bedsheet instead of a pink bedsheet. Wait what so you saw a change in your bedsheet color so that doesn't mean that it is the doom. Well, To begin with it wasn't the bedsheet that changed its color but the entire world itself. I walked out of my room called out to my mum and dad but no one responded. So curios I went outside and saw Tall building like skyscrapers all around instead of my regular building and all the plants withered and the most shocking thing of these all changes was that the Sky's color was Red and not the Sky blue color and well I think there is no Sky Blue Color anymore and Sky Red color is going to be the new trend. I was still in a state of amazement when I saw my mum and dad who appeared to look like aliens with another planet and I think it would have been mars as Earth looked a lot like mars now in my opinion. My mum approached me and asked why I haven't wore my Formals. What formals? And everyone where wearing these Formals That were a bit weird. And then I heard a voice and it belonged to my little sister and she said, “ Wake up you lazy pants..” And then I woke and realized it was all a dream.

Hi, Rose! I’m going to be doing a line-by-line style edit, so I won’t say much here, but thanks for the chance to read your story again - I greatly enjoyed it!

rose wrote:

As the train rattled through the countryside, the night outside grew darker, casting an eerie ambiance onto the cabin lights flickering inside. The train chugged along the tracks, the rhythmic sound of wheels turning. The year was 1825, a time when the train system was still a novel and exciting mode of transportation. Little did the passengers on this particular journey know that they were moving through the heart of danger.

I really like this as an intro! It really sets the scene well, and I like the mention of the date. I love historical fiction pieces, so I may be biased. There are only two small edits I would make here:
First, the second sentence almost sounds incomplete, I think because of the incomplete nature of the second phrase. You could fix this any number of ways, but here is my suggestion: “The rhythmic sound of wheels turning heralded the train as it chugged along the tracks.” However, the main thing is to connect the second phrase to the first in a clear way.
Second, and this is more so personal preference, but I would say “into” the heart of danger, since it feels as though the danger is just about to begin, instead of there already.

rose wrote:

Among the individuals nestled in plush velvet seats, finest silk dresses, and tailored suits lurked a villain with a sinister mission. This cunning mastermind had devised a diabolical plot to eradicate specific individuals of wealth, taking advantage of their journey on the train to carry out his wicked deeds.

Cool! Not much to say on this, though you use the pronoun “his” to referr to the villain here, but later shift to pretty much only ever using the word “they” - I’m not sure if that was intentional, but I decided to point it out in case it was an accident.

rose wrote:

The villain, known only as The Engineer, had carefully studied the schedules, routes, and passenger lists of the train system. Armed with ruthless determination, they had vowed to seek revenge on the elite who had wronged them in the past, orchestrating their demise in a most macabre manner.

I like how vague the villain remains even as we are shown more of their motivation! Very cool. Also, again, (yes I know I said this last time) but “a most macabre manner” is perfect alliteration and I love it.

rose wrote:

One by one, the passengers slowly rose from their seats and made their way towards their lavishly decorated cabins, the atmosphere tensed. Little did they realize the perilous fate that awaited them behind those cabin doors.

I feel like you don’t need the word “slowly” since you already say “one by one” which implies slowness. As well, make note of the fact that this first sentence is not complete. I would add the word “as” before “the passengers” to remedy this.

rose wrote:

Lady Victoria Ashford, a socialite adorned in shimmering jewels that glimmered in the light, was the epitome of grace and beauty. She had been born into one of the wealthiest families in the city and was on the train to visit her family estate.

Perhaps, just to streamline the sentence, merely say that “The Ashfords were one of the wealthiest families in the city, and Victoria was on the train…”

rose wrote:

She was oblivious to the danger lurking within, eagerly anticipating a restful night's sleep. However, when she entered, she discovered a chilling sight. As the train chugged along, a strange odor began to fill the compartment. Immediately, the scent grew stronger, and Lady Victoria's eyes began to water, her throat beginning to burn. Her screams went unheard, muffled by the silence of the night, as her lungs struggled for breath and her vision faded into darkness. She had already collapsed onto the ground, her shimmering jewels now a somber reminder of her life which had been taken far too soon.

I like this! Feels just dramatic, with a hint of mournful, enough! Here are some changes I would make for clarity, as I find the words “begin” “grew” etc. make it seem as though the action is never completed. As well, I found the use of the phrase “chilling sight” confusing, as I assumed the poison was in gaseous form. Is it visible? If so, I would explain how it looks a bit more.

vi wrote:

She was oblivious to the danger lurking within, instead eagerly anticipating a restful night's sleep. However, when she entered, a strange odor greeted her. Immediately, the scent grew stronger, and Lady Victoria's eyes watered, her throat burning as the poison entered her body. Her screams went unheard, muffled by the silence of the night, as her lungs struggled for breath and her vision faded into darkness. She had already collapsed onto the ground, her shimmering jewels now ironic and somber in their beauty, a reminder of the life which had been taken far too soon.

rose wrote:

Across the corridor, Mr. William Hargrave, a wealthy businessman, loosened his tie and stretched his limbs as he approached his cabin. Unbeknownst to him, The Engineer had tampered with the lock, ensuring that it opened properly only from the inside, unless you were open to a deadly surprise. As the unsuspecting Mr. Hargrave turned the doorknob, a surge of fear washed over him. His pulse quickened, and a sense of impending doom whispered in his ear.

I’d talk more about this premonition, though of course it’s up to you.

rose wrote:

Inside the cabin, a grotesque mechanical contraption awaited its victim. The Engineer knew precisely when the cabin door would be opened and unleashed an intricate system of gears, triggering a deadly mechanism. Hidden blades shot out from the walls, slicing through the air with deadly precision. In a mere matter of seconds, Mr. Hargrave's life was abruptly cut short, his death witnessed only by the ticking of the train's wheels.

Yeesh~ this is intense,, I quite like it though! Only comment here would be to add “only” in the final sentence, since I feel it makes the limited nature of the witness more clear.

rose wrote:

One by one, The Engineer continued to claim their victims, each death more inventive and cruel than the last. The passengers, still unaware of the horrors unfolding around them, descended into an uneasy sleep, oblivious to the imminent danger that surrounded them. The villain reveled in their malevolent actions, their rage satisfied further with each successful execution.

I like how as the story is intensifying we’re pulling back to look again at a wider view of the scene! Here my only changes would be to remove the word “uneasy” because it seems to contradict your statement of their being oblivious, and to add “further” because without it it sounds as though the Engineer is satisfied by each execution, but that doesn’t seem to be fully true - they seem to continue to hunger for more violence.

rose wrote:

However, unbeknownst to The Engineer, so confident in his wickedness, a young, seasoned investigator by the name of Daisy Rayne had been tracking their every move. She was a woman of colour with piercing dark blue eyes and an intelligent mindset.

{Not sure if this is important, but you use the pronoun his again.}
Yes, I love that we’re getting a hero introduced! I feel like the introduction could be a little more well-developed, however. (Though I’m pretty sure this character was changed quite a bit since I read the original, so I totally understand her introduction being less well polished.)
Here are my more specific notes on her introduction:

rose wrote:

…a young, seasoned investigator…

I feel like these two adjectives are somewhat contradictory. Perhaps you could acknowledge this by saying “a young but seasoned investigator,” or you could also say “a young but talented/gifted/successful/etc investigator.”

rose wrote:

…She was a woman of colour with piercing dark blue eyes….

I feel like “woman of colour” is a little vague, which is fine, it’s just not really helping me picture her accurately. I’d love to hear more about her appearance, though I understand this is meant to be a quick introduction.

rose wrote:

…and an intelligent mindset.

Finally, I feel like this description isn’t all that neccessary. I just find that the fact that she’s an investigator at all, and that she succeeds (presumably?) in capturing the Engineer, already tells us this.

rose wrote:

As the night wore on, and the moon reached its zenith, Rayne had managed to uncover the identity of the villain and their heinous intentions. She had done her job of unveiling all of his motives.

{Again, not sure if this is important, but you use the pronoun his here as well.}
One grammatical/punctuation error: a comma isn’t needed before the phrase about the moon.
I feel this final sentence isn’t necessary as we’re already given pretty comparable information in the previous one.

rose wrote:

With stealth and determination, Detective Rayne moved through the darkened train, her footsteps barely audible against the backdrop of rumbling engines.
As she stepped away, the train continued its steady rhythm, echoing the battle of wits that was about to unfold. The dimly lit compartment held secrets of a railway murder, and with each passing moment, Daisy was determined to expose the darkness lurking within.

Not quite sure what you mean by “stepped away.” Otherwise, I think it would be helpful to keep the name you use for Daisy more consistent, just to make it as easy to follow as possible.

rose wrote:

The year was 1825 and though the train system continued to grow in popularity, it now bore an air of trepidation and dread. The passengers who had witnessed The Engineer's malevolence would forever recall the night when the train became a conduit for murder and mayhem, casting a shadow upon an otherwise extraordinary innovation.

I feel like I could have used more of a transition between this thought and the last one, and I think it would greatly help the complete story to finish up the storyline with Daisy. I really love your story, though! And, again, bringing it back to the beginning is awesome! I love how you used that tactic here, and the omniscient narrator is also very well executed throughout.

Overall, this is a lovely (can I rightly use that word about a murder story?) piece and I wish you best of luck in the competition! I hope my edits are of some use to you.

critiques by xxfierroorfalafelxx

for @silverlynx-


Okay so reading this, the first thing that jumped out at me was the word shard, and shard is just a word that I really love lol even though I’m aware you are referring to an actual building. You really paint these amazing pictures of London though after a while I think there are parts where it gets really adjective heavy. Evidently, at least from what I see, the descriptions are meant to be a little bit poetic, but I would be careful that you don’t get too flowery with it. Also wouldn’t 21:50 be fairly late at night if you’re using the twenty-four hour clock, or did you mean 12:50 as in a little after midnight? I like how it goes from just a seemingly ordinary day to there suddenly being a crack tearing through the floor and everything going into ruins. It does feel a bit rushed, but I suppose it just goes to show how disasters can strike suddenly. These descriptions of the ruins and of the mist really leave your readers awestruck and you use a lot of creative words. I would love to find out more about the main character in this. Obviously this is only a very small chunk but I hope we find some reason to care about the main character soon. You use British spellings so unfortunately I cannot help you with that. As I said, I really like it, but I personally recommend you add a little bit more before submitting it for the writing competition, but as with all advice I give you, it is merely advice and it is your choice whether or not you use it. It is very description heavy, which I think is fine considering you do seem to be very good at it, but for the most part that seems to be all this is. I would suggest that maybe you consider other elements that are important to making a good story. This seems like the beginning to a longer story, am I correct? Perhaps it might be a good idea to give readers a little taste of what’s to come in the story. Is the mist really just mist, or does it have any special secrets? How is everyone responding to London being destroyed? What do they think of this mist?


for @PixelDucko Alright so since this is kind of spaced out into little sections I’ll just give critique section by section. Any section that is only one sentence will most likely be grouped with another one. Section 1: ( “Alright. Are we all ready?” The stars casted their graceful rays onto the grassy hill…)
The first thing I would suggest is that you switch casted to cast. Other than that it seems well-written and it leaves the reader curious to learn more about these characters which is good.
Section 2: (They had all been waiting for this moment…)
Again we’ll start with spelling. It should be spelled completed not competed. I’m not sure how I feel about calling the work oh so hard, and it’s up to you, but that particular wording may imply that there is subtext, perhaps a little mocking and sarcastic? At least that’s what I usually think when I see those words but it’s your choice. Once again it’s adding to a good beginning for your story.
Section 3: (First, Hester had tested…) I like how we get the description of how Hester tested out this machine. I also like how there is a tense switch but it’s done in a way that makes sense and is easy to understand. At the beginning of the story, it seemed that there was going to be an omniscient narrator, and this section has that a lot as well. I don’t think you see omniscient narrators too much in modern fiction, so that’s cool to see. I like that last sentence about trying again and making something great, but I don’t know if using the word would as in ‘you would step back’, makes sense in this context. The way that I’m reading it, using the word ‘will’ personally makes more sense to me, but I could just be reading it wrong.
Section 4: (But, she prevailed…) I like how this tells us more about Hester, but it’s a bit more tell than show. Of course in short stories that is to be expected, so I wouldn’t worry too much, but there is room for improvement.
Section 5: (With anticipation growing…)
May have, not may had. This is kind of funny honestly. The reader gets the excitement that the machine worked and the eraser is really good and then a new character is introduced with a great first line of dialogue. A lot more what than she would like to admit?
Section 6: (Hester continued to test, fix, test, fix…) It’s your choice, since it’s your own story, but for a short story, this one is repeating itself a lot, and so far there is a lot of exposition. I would just consider that in your edits. Once again it is up to you. Also I think you forgot an ‘a’ in front of planet.
Unfortunately I cannot give you any more tips. It’s a cool story and a fun concept, but I personally think that maybe you could do something different with the pacing.
Also I love this sentence: The first step onto the path isn’t extraordinary, after all. But the fact that you gained the courage to take the step, is.


for @BookLover209
I really love the writing style of this and the introduction we get to the situation. You definitely tend to use a lot of shorter sentences, but you do have some longer sentences in there too which is good for variety. Plus short sentences tend to have more punch to them. I might recommend a few more long, complex sentences, but the short sentence majority definitely works in your favor. The scenes aren’t described with a ton of detail, but I think we get what we need, however knowing the layout of the area a little better might be beneficial to your readers. I feel like this is very tell and not show however, so I think there are some things you could possibly do to really like showcase how theo feels about jasmine instead of just telling, but i don’t know. I think you show two interesting perspectives and you write them well, but with the way it switches perspectives so quickly and the way the plot is, I’m just not sure it’s in this story’s best interest, because it honestly kind of takes away the element of surprise from your readers. It;s your choice of course but honestly I would recommend only doing Theo’s point of view and if you do end up doing eden’s point of view, don’t tell us who she is. Maybe leave subtle clues though. Having these two points of view could be good, actually it could have a ton of potential, but I think there are some changes that could be done to make it better. Or maybe I’m just the kind of person who wants to be surprised along with a character. I don’t know though. I’m just curious, is this a prologue scene? It kind of reminds me of one. I’m also curious about this whole system with the alpha and beta and just how this world works. I doubt that’s too relevant in this scene but I’m a little curious nonetheless. Also I like reading about Eden trying to figure out how to act. Obviously this is just advice and you can choose to ignore all of it. Hope some of it helps though.

for @cb2jkl As I said before i absolutely love the poetic language in this and all the metaphors and imagery. I love the different ways that thread is used to convey a message in this and I like the journey of different emotions that this takes us through. Just a note you did spell wound wrong in the middle but that’s an easy fix. I’m not the best with poetry so I am going to have a bit of difficulty critiquing this just because poetry is really subjective and there’s so many different things that you can do with it. You could possible throw question marks in since there are many questions in this but once again punctuation in poetry is a tricky thing. I like the repetition with i wonder

July 27th - critique
370 words

This was great, I enjoyed the concept of your story. It started off nicely with the lovely imagery, how you highlighted and captured small details that enlightened the story. The pacing was appropriate for the scene and I think you balanced dialogue with characterization, expressions and descriptions pretty well. My only concern is towards emotion — I think you can make the passage a bit more emotional and in a way, dramatic, to fit the overall meaning of the story. Truly amazing though, would love to see more <3

Red hair glinted like fire in the fading rays of the setting sun.

oo I like this as the starting sentence! perhaps though, I think it makes a bit more sense and adds description to say “the sun's waning rays caught (a piece of) her red hair, glistening like fire in..”

A breeze rushed across the hilltop, whipping our cloaks up in billowing clouds behind us, stinging my cheeks, sending a shiver down my arms.

hm, i'm not sure, but using the word “whipping” in this paragraph is a bit confusing and slightly misleading. also, the sentence itself can be broken down? Or, have the word “and” shoved in somewhere. eg. “..stinging my cheeks, and sending a shiver down my arms.” or “a breeze rushed across the hilltop, whipping our cloaks up in billowing clouds behind us. a piercing shiver ran down my arms as the sensation pricked/stung (at) my cheek.”

“You’ll be coming back, though?” I asked.

fairly, I think you can add more emotion? eg. “I questioned, although secretly knowing the genuine response, hoping it was wrong,”

Hesitation. Eyes, frozen on my face, before darting down to the earth.

it can simply be said “a look of hesitation swept over his face, his frightened eyes frozen upon mine,”

A misgiving, dark and creeping like the clouds on the horizon, twinged within me.

I’d reword this sentence, it’s a bit unclear and confusing. something along the lines of “within my heart, a dark suspicion crept, like a shadowed cloud on the horizon.”

But no. This was Father I was thinking of.

I'd replace the period with a comma (“but no, this was..”)

“You’ll be good for your aunt and uncle?” Father asked.

I nodded.

“Take care of your sister,” he said.

I nodded.

personally, I would write “you'll be good for..” father asked. “take care of our sister,” I nodded, repeatedly."

“Good.” He lifted my chin so I looked him in the face.

I think it would sound smoother to write “good,” he lifted my chin, our eyes meeting for the last time."

"..and hugged me tight.

another thing I would personally write instead is “and pulled me into a tight hug,”

Warmth, protection, like another cloak around my shoulders.

stop, I love this sentence :sob: I don't want to ruin it, but what about “warmth and protection; my second cloak..”

I hugged him back, hoping to impart some small part of that warmth to him. He looked like he needed it.

as you just used warmth, I would describe it as comfort instead.

title undecided: It all began with a soggy paper airplane. Chizuru was doing her homework in her room and her little sister Sakura was kneeling by the window tracing raindrops as they went down and excitedly cheering them on as if they were in a race. Chizuru would be just about to think of the name of some WWII general, and then suddenly Sakura’s voice would shout, “and Benny wins the round!” By then Chizuru had forgotten the name of the general.
“Sakura, can you be quiet?” she finally snapped.
Immediately she knew that had been a bad idea. Sakura’s lower lip quivered and she blinked rapidly but Chizuru saw her black eyes watering. “What happened to you? You used to be fun!”
To Sakura, fun obviously meant being loud and annoying, but a thirteen-year-old like Chizuru had to be mature and it didn’t have time for silly nonsense. Still, Chizuru felt a pang of guilt when she saw her little sister crying. “I’m sorry, Sakura. I’m just stressed.”
“You’re always stressed,” Sakura said, crossing her arms. “Buuuut…” she said, stretching out the word. “I’ll let it go this time. Just don’t do it again.”
So Sakura kept on playing her raindrop racing game and Chizuru did her best to ignore her. Sakura shouted something, maybe about something on the roof? Chizuru wasn’t sure, she was finally focused on her essay. She’d been typing for a few minutes then something started to feel off. She looked back over to where Sakura was and her eyes widened in horror.
Right below the window was the porch roof which was currently being rained on which made it very slippery and Sakura was already more than halfway through the window. Chizuru made some sort of panicked sound somewhere between, “Stop!” and “Sakura!” She tried grabbing Sakura to pull her back inside but instead she was pulled out too. All of her annoyance with Sakura suddenly vanished and all she could think about was trying to save them, but the roof was steep and slippery. They tried to hold onto the shingles but they were falling at a rapid pace. She saw Sakura pick something that used to be white off the roof–Chizuru thought it looked like a soggy paper airplane– and then they had slipped off the roof. Chizuru screamed and squeezed her eyes shut, her instincts told her to protect her little sister, but before she got a chance they hit something. It was weirdly smooth and flexible but still a bit rough, and the landing didn’t hurt at all.
“Whoa,” she heard Sakura say in an awed voice and decided to open her eyes. No. It was a dream. It had to be a dream. She had passed out while working on her essay because there was no way that they were ten feet in the air sitting on a giant paper airplane.
“This is so cool!” Sakura shouted. She leaned to the left which made the paper airplane tilt left and made Chizuru queasy.
“Careful!” she yelped as they rose higher and higher in the air. “There’s no seatbelts on this thing.”
“Well then don’t fall off,” Sakura laughed. “It wants to take us somewhere.”
“It’s a paper airplane. It shouldn’t want stuff. We shouldn’t be able to ride it.”
“Stop worrying about the logic of it so much,” Sakura told her.
Well Chizuru would keep worrying about the logic of it, or at least she started to, but then the paper airplane did a flip in the wind, leaving Chizuru screaming and Sakura letting out a whoop of delight. Chizuru had her eyes squeezed shut, and even though Sakura was ahead of her, somehow she could tell because she told her to open her eyes. Chizuru shook her head, eyes still shut tight, not even registering the fact that they hadn’t plummeted to the ground.
She didn’t open her eyes until she could feel them flying normally and then they were going toward the upstairs window of a cheerful yellow house. “Oh no, oh no,” she groaned. “Sakura, help me steer us out of here!”
“We won’t crash,” Sakura said, obviously having full faith in the paper airplane. “It wants us to be here.”
Chizuru decided there was no point in trying to argue with Sakura and just tried not to look down at the ground that was thirty feet below or the third-storey window. The panicked voice in her head was yelling, this is bad, this is bad, until it was interrupted by Sakura shouting, “duck!”
Chizuru ducked and then the paper airplane went through the window and into a bedroom.
The bedroom was messy, littered with art supplies. There was a shelf covered in sculptures made from all sorts of materials. The walls were covered in drawings and blueprints. And there were paper airplanes everywhere. There was a bed tucked in the corner and on the table next to it was a family photo. Chizuru’s eyes widened in horror. Oh no. There, smiling next to his parents and older sister, was a boy from her class, Declan Giroux.
“Sakura, we have to get out of here right now.” Chizuru turned back to Sakura, but her little sister just pointed at the spot where the giant paper airplane had been. In its place was a regular-sized one. Chizuru blinked and suddenly she didn’t care that it was neither logical nor safe to ride a giant paper airplane, it would be even worse if Declan found them. “Well it grew earlier, let's try it again.” So Sakura threw the paper airplane out the window, but it stayed its regular size. Earlier they had been in danger, maybe that was why it had grown. But Sakura didn’t want to test that theory. A fall of thirty feet would definitely k*ll them. “Quick, just hide,” she told Sakura.
Before they even got the chance, the door opened and there stood Declan Giroux with his brown freckled face that was impossibly handsome and his thick black hair that was in many braids which were all pulled back in a ponytail. Declan blinked. “…Sakura?”
All the blood had drained from Sakura’s face a few moments ago but now all of it and some more came pouring back. “I-it’s n-not what it looks like,” she stammered. “I swear, we-we-we were just…” how exactly was she supposed to explain this?
“Your paper airplanes are magic! It saved my life!” Sakura exclaimed.

Have you ever wondered about the invention of Chocolate Milkshake? Well, This writing piece would make sure that you know about it so without further ado lets get started and spoiler alert: This is mostly fictional but some are true facts).

Invention of Chocolate milkshake:
As we know that Milton Snavely Hershey founded the Hershey chocolate company and found a new way to make chocolate. Though he had some failures he never gave up and set a true example and after his invention of the modern day chocolate. There was girl named Emily or shot for Em. Em was a very curious person and often with her curiosity, she made new invention for a better world. So one fine day, She and her family were having a nice and pleasant picnic in their backyard. Her mum bought some Chocolate for Em and her little and notorious brother–Dave. Em thought of a new way eating this chocolate. Well she went back to her drawing board and had a big grin on her face as she just came up with a brilliant idea. She was ready to test her idea into reality. She grabbed a glass of milk poured some in her mouth and then took some chocolate and stuffed it into her mouth and that was heaven to her. The taste that her tongue was tasting was truly divine. The chocolate melted in her mouth and the milk added a distinct flavor that can't be explained. She then took a blender, put some chocolate, milk and sugar and then blended it. That was it. Emily invented Chocolate Milkshake. SHe served this Divine drink to her family member who seem to Enjoy it as much as she did for the first time. This little girl Invention is what that the entire world is enjoying now.

daily, 1172 words

the daily I posted - quick, shuffle your playlist - or put some of your favourite songs into a random picker wheel and spin it - and now write a songfic using some of the lyrics! you get a bonus mango if your story matches the mood of the song ;D your songfic muct be at least 300 words, exclulding lyrics, for 400 points <33
the daily I used - take any album of ur choosing and work the title of each song (in any order) into that piece of writing for at least 300 words from @zparkly (i did evermore, in order! song titles are in bold <3)

Midnight; beneath the willow tree near the graveyard. Raised voices tearing apart the silence, phone torch beams slicing through the dark.
“I can’t keep doing this!” The speaker's words descended into a sob. “I’m so sorry. But I’ve had enough of these… these secret meetings, had enough of hiding whatever this is. Whatever we are. I’ve had enough of you and your ‘champagne problems.’ I have to leave, okay?”
“No! No you don’t,” The other voice pleaded, desperately. “I said I would stop, for you. And I did, I promise! Don’t listen to what everyone says – they don’t matter, we matter. We matter!”
“Apparently not enough,” she hissed. There was no sympathy in her voice. Not anymore. “Not enough for you to actually tell anyone. Not enough to stop hiding everything, like you always do.”
“But, I-”
“I don’t want to leave you, okay! But you don’t give you much of a choice.” she handed something to him. It shone under the artificial moonlight of their phone torches – a single, dull pink rose. Slightly crumpled from the tight fist she had been holding it in, but beautiful just the same, and beginning to unfurl in his open palm.
“You’ll forget me soon enough. Find someone that actually likes meeting up in graveyards.”
And she was gone.
He stared at the broken, beautiful rose.
He stared at the ring clutched in his other hand.
It was a beautiful ring, even though it was old. Historic, even. He liked to say it dated back to his ancestors that came here in the gold rush, but he wasn’t sure how true that was. It was his only possession of actual value.
And he had been prepared to give it to her.
Well, it was useless now.
He threw it in the dirt as he walked away.

“Hey, what's this?”
The teenager bent down to pick up something glinting in the sunlit, dewy grass.
“A ring?” His friend peered over his shoulder. “What are you going to do with a rusty old ring like that?”
“Might be historic,” the boy grinned. “Maybe I’ll give it to someone for Christmas.”
“It’s barely December,” the girl shot back, rolling her eyes.
“Exactly, it’s December! ‘Tis the d/mn season!”
“That’s what you said in October. When you put the Christmas lights up.”
“In my house!”
“I have to come over to your house like every day!”
“Well, then tolerate it!”
He pocketed the ring, and they strolled off, continuing their walk. They soon both forgot about it. Neither of them noticed when it fell out of the boy’s pocket and onto the footpath.

It was midday when the officer found a ring left on the footpath, outside the victims house.
“Evidence,” he hissed, picking it up and studying it. It looked old. Historic, perhaps. “A crucial clue to finding the truth behind this murder.”
The other officer sighed, loudly. “She isn’t even dead yet.”
“She will be, soon!”
The second officer raised an eyebrow.
“If my detection is correct, I mean.” he amended hastily. “The s-star signs lead me to believe I would need to investigate something that will happen to her soon, so I thought I might as well start early…”
“Mmhmm.” the other officer sounded disinterested. “But I don’t think the boss will like it. You know what he says - no body, no crime.”
“He doesn’t need to know! Y’know, obliviousness is happiness or whatever? He’s better not knowing.”
The officer felt his back pocket begin to vibrate suddenly. A call; he must be needed! Had there been a murder?
He grabbed his phone, dropping the ring in the process, and hurried back to the waiting police car.

“Careful, Dorothea!”
The frazzled mother grabbed her child as she tripped and stumbled over something left on the road.
“A ring!” her other daughter exclaimed, picking it up in her grubby little fingers. “Thea, look! A ring! I bet it’s real diamond!”
“But I found it first!” Dorothea complained, trying to snatch it from her sister.
“Girls, please!” Their mother desperately looked at her watch. “We’re going to be late to meet Dad! You do want to go to coney island, don’t you? We can’t go if you argue!”
The children did not listen.
“IVY, GIVE IT!”
“BUT IT’S MINE!”
“I HAD IT FIRST!”
“YOU FELL OVER IT, THAT DOESN’T COUNT!”
“YOU ALWAYS COPY ME! YOU EVEN DRESSED UP LIKE A COWBOY, LIKE ME! YOU ALWAYS STEAL MY IDEAS!”
“IT WAS MY IDEA FIRST!!!”
Dorothea tried to swipe it from Ivy, Ivy lifted it into the air but began to fall backwards, it flew out of her hands and soared into the air, and –

It fell to another passer–bys feet.
A ring? she thought, leaning down to pick it up. What an excellent writing prompt.
She flicked on her phone, put on her writing playlist, opened her notes app, and began.
Long story short, I found the ring on the street. It didn’t matter how I found it really. What matters is what happened next…
She wrote the whole way home.

“Marjorie?” the man called. “What’s this?”
He picked up a strange ring left on his daughter’s desk.
“Oh, that? Just something I found. I was writing about it.” Marjorie called from the other room, where she continued to type. “You can read my draft if you’d like. When I’ve finished it.”
He examined it. “This was a good find, we could sell it to an antique shop, maybe. What’s this written on it?”
“I don’t know, I think it’s in another language. You can’t even read some of the letters – but it kind of looks like the word ‘closure’.
“Oh, cool. What’s your story called?”
“The working title is ‘Evermore.’ But I’m writing, Dad, and you’re interrupting.”
“Yep, sorry.”
He left, and he took the ring with him.

The girl walked through the antique shop.
She still regretted leaving him. Their relationship was complicated, yes, but it was beautiful sometimes, too. And she had heard how sad he had been in the week since they broke up. She felt guilty – he had said he was going to change, and she hadn’t believed him, hadn’t even given him a chance. What would’ve happened if she had given him a chance?
She saw a ring on display. He liked old rings, she remembered.
She pulled her phone from her pocket, began to write a text. She deleted it. She wrote something else. She deleted that, too. She couldn’t find the words, not anymore.
It ended up being only one word – tonight.

He stared at his phone screen, uncomprehending, hardly daring to believe.
He was sure he would wake up soon, find that it was all a mistake, watch it disappear before his eyes –
It didn’t disappear. He texted back.
midnight? right where you left me?
She would know what he meant.

She watched the time flick over to 11:30. She took a deep breath - was this the right choice?
Don’t overthink it, she told herself. It’s time to go.

Weekly // 27.07.2023

THE SWC ERAS TOUR —–>

Ancient History…

SONG (50 words)
———
London bridge is falling down, falling down, falling down,
The perfect distraction to steal the crown, steal the crown, steal the crown,
It will definitely ruin this town, ruin this town, ruin this town,
I am scared that we'll all drown, we'll all drown, we'll all drown,
The water below looks cold and brown, cold and brown, cold and brown. (60 words)



Prompt: Create a mythological creature of your own and produce a factfile. - 400 words

THE SERPENT

The serpent is a creature much alike to a snake, but even more bloodthirsty and ruthless. Coming across one of these would assure your instant death. Avoid The Serpent at all costs.

Although there are only a handful among the population of humans, they can travel so fast that it seems as if they are in more than one place at once. Their long, slithering body can change colour to camoflauge just as a chameleon can so it is almost impossible to spot them. Luckily, they will rarely appear in busy places like towns, markets or community areas because it can get extremely claustrophobic and in fatal conditions where the crowds are extensive, it can cause death to The Serpent.

Its diet consists of human flesh which it will stop at nothing to get. Once The Serpent reaches a certain level of hunger, the frenzy kicks in, and a frenzied Serpent is NOT something that you would want on the loose! A frenzy is when The Serpent becomes so extremely hungry that it goes on a furious rampage around villages eating whatever human flesh it can until it eats so much that it regurgitates it all and the hunger kicks in again. You simply cannot stop a frenzy because it keeps going round in a loop: eating large amounts, regurgitating the food and then becoming hungry again.

You can tell apart your normal snakes and The Serpent by the fangs. The largest fangs found on a snake reach up to two inches, whereas The Serpent has fangs that reach the length of a foot. The Serpent can disguise itself though by retreating its fangs and only pushing them out to their full length when feeding on prey. It can also suck in the air in its lungs to make itself thinner. This is how it fits through the gaps that most snakes cannot.

Nothing was out of the ordinary at Cherry’s Scratch Writing Camp, which was taken after the idea of the online swc and her older cousin had started the in person version. Many swcers from around the world signed up, but no one knows how they all got to this mysterious planet far away from earth, that was fondly dubbed ‘Smalls’.
When you sign up, you sign up using your scratch username and the rest of the sign up process is the exactly the same and this year when you get sorted, the net morning, you wake up at swc and your parents know that you are gone for the month, and can send you letters.
(115 words)

In the morning there was a knock on the door of tragedy and there stood CJ.
“CJ? What are you doing here?” Silvi asks.
“It’s Cabin Wars and so, I shall give you a war. Cabin Wars! At least three people in your cabin have to collaborate to create a short story of at least 700 words. You have 24 hours, or else lose 1000 points. Each cabin can only receive this war once, so here you can have the war. Extra challenge: Character swap! To complete this challenge, at least two cabin members must share a short biography of one of their original characters in their cabin comments. They must then claim a character that is not their own, and write 300 words from the perspective of that character. Every cabin member who participates can win 50 points. This applies for up to six campers resulting in 300 points earned maximum!” Laughing manically, they leave.
Cherry murmurs something that no one can make out and goes back to sleep, which causes Hybri to have a heart attack and yell, “Our most powerful weapon! Asleep! What are we to do?!”
“Uh.. Write?” A rubs her eyes and picks up her notebook.
“Other than that!”
“Wait for them to wake up?”
“Ugh, I hate how practical you are.”
It wasn’t long before Silvi, A, and Hybri finish the war and happily walk over to thriller and throw open the door to yell, “War complete!”
When they return, Cherry is nowhere to be found.
“Where’s our powerful weapon!?” Hybri exclaims.
“Warring. Every. Single. Other. Cabin.” Pepper says, “I tried to stop them from attacking our siblings and allies, but they yeeted me out the door and warred our sibs and allies with easier wars and our enemies with the impossible wars.”
“Oh ok.” Silvi takes a seat next to Cae right in front of the door and they waited for the next person to show up with a war, and Pepper leaves.
“Why did Cherry war everyone?! Now we have like a million impossible wars sent to us exactly after 3 hours!” Cae exclaims after some time.
Pepper grins, her insane side kicking in, and the rest of the cabin start writing like manics. The chaos started. They continued to war everyone and panicked over normal things like writing one word too less than what they wanted, and many of them attempted the extra challenges and complained about things, but since they still sleep in their own time zones, it wasn’t long before most people went to bed. Cherry cracked their knuckles and started to become the idiotic insane writer.
When everyone woke up, Cherry was half asleep, but had managed to save the cabin, with help here and there- almost.
Two wars had slipped through their fingers and had only a little time left till time was up, but the weapon was back asleep and Tragedy was scrambling to finish and Cae ran to the main cabin and requested Wild to help the cabin write for one of the wars. Wild saved the cabin from losing one of the wars, while the rest of the cabin finished the other war. Cherry requested new fingers to replace the fingers they had exploded during cabin wars.
(544 words)

“You know… what do you think would have happened if Cherry was not in our cabin?”
“We would not have survived cabin wars, duh. Iris, I’m sure you know that.”
“I do Mouse, but don’t you think that the cabins all will want Cherry to join their cabin if they continue to write like this every cabin wars?”
“Mouse? Cherry’s dying in her bed.”
“Their fine, Twi. It’s just because of how much they wrote.”
“OK, but Cherry isn’t like the best writer or whatever.”
“Um.. I know that.”
“Like, if we didn’t have such good teamwork, and good ideas, and writing skill, they couldn’t have done it.”
“That’s true. We kept writing words to help Cherry every so often, otherwise, we would have lost all the wars,” Mouse added.
“I still have a bad feeling about how next session, everyone’s going to want to have Cherry in their cabin,” Iris sighs.
“Why are you thinking about that right now?” Twi asks. “Focus on the fact that we might just get first place this session!”
Just then, someone knocks on the door and they open to see that Moonlit and Mouse are standing there.
“Hi tragedy! here are you most likely to's for this session - if you could please vote on them and get back to me with results by 11:59 pm utc on July 29th, that would be great! most likely to get lost in the forest | most likely to go poking around in the mysterious abandoned cellar | most likely to try and keep an animal from the forest as a pet | most likely to get adopted by a mysterious rich man | most likely to burn down the orphanage | most likely to successfully run away. Thanks.”
Cae takes the piece of paper Moonlit is holding and then as moonlit leaves Mouse asks, “Remember how I told you that taking Cherry was a good idea?”
“Yes, Mouse I remember the whole story you told me about them writing a ton of words and saving you. Cherry did the same for us.”
“The war we had while trying to decide which cabin Cherry is going to join was really funny, because like Iris wanted them, Twi wanted them, I wanted them, but they didn’t even sign up for ours, so you got them.”
“Yeah, I was laughing when I saw how you all were fighting over whose cabin they should go to before you realized she didn’t even sign up for your cabin.”
“82 more words…. 72 more words… 64 more words… 52… 48… 37… 25… 18… 10… 5… 3… 1… YESSSSSSSS!!! I did it! I finished the next section of the weekly!” comes A’s yell from somewhere in the cabin.
“If only my words moved that fast…” sighed Cherry.
“Looks like the weapon isn’t able to write after all the writing they did a few days ago,” hybrid laughs and pats Cherry on the head.
Mouse get up and waves and as she opens the door, says, “Cherry, you better sign up for whatever cabin I lead, if I lead next session.”
“Whatever,” they reply.
(521 words)


“I’m hungry, when’s dinner?” Silvi complains.
“You know that you can go get food whenever you want, since meals are at different times in different time zones, right?” Cae raises an eyebrow.
“Yes, but you can only have food during your meal times in your time zone, and I have to wait until dinner!”
“Um… When did you have lunch?” A looks at Silvi.
“She had it an hour ago!” Hybri pokes their head into the room.
“Welp.” Cae gets up. “I’m going to get a snack at the snack room.”
“THERE’S A SNACK ROOM!? TAKE ME THERE PLEASE!”
“No.”
“WHYYYYYYYYYYYY?!”
“Because you’ve been here for almost a whole month, but still don’t know where the snack room is, is kind of depressing.”
Cherry walks in at that moment with food and Silvi leaps at them, and Cherry screams and runs back out.
After some time of Silvi begging to know where the snack room is, and Cae refusing to show her where it is, Pepper interferes.
“Cae, go get your own food.”
Cae walks out and it was barely a few seconds later when Pepper continues, “Silvi, you should follow her, because I’ve never heard of this ‘snack room’.”
Hybri nods, “I’m coming too!”
Cherry returns, “I ate all my snacks, so I want to see what this ‘snack room’ is.”
A just nods in agreement.
Almost the rest of the Tragedy cabin exclaims, “Cae has been acting weird…”
“I want foooood!!!”
“I’m coming!”
And more similar comments.
So, almost the whole of the Tragedy cabin shadow Cae as she goes from cabin to cabin, stealing all their food, sneaks into the main food room through the kitchen’s window, and takes a bunch of food from there and returns to the tragedy cabin with tons of food.
“Wait.. where is everyone?”
“CAE!! THAT’S WHERE YOU GOT THE FOOD!?” Silvi exclaims.
“Uh… Yea..?”
“Midnight feast!” Cherry says excited.
“But, none of us have midnight at the same time?” Hybri laughs. “Child.”
“No, no. Like when it’s kind of late for some of us, kind of early for others, and night of some others, we eat!”
“Ahhh, ok.”
So, when they looked at the food, at the planned time, they were in awe of all the food that Cae had stolen.

“Toffee from tragedy.”
“Crackers from Hi-Fi.”
“Chocolate from Myth.”
“Juice form Lyric.”
“Cookies from Steampunk.”
“Ice cream from Thriller.”
“Cheese from Real-Fi.”
“Fruits from Poetry.”
“Popcorn from Thriller.”
“Dried fruit from Dystopian.”
“Granola from Lit-fi.”
“Snack bars from Contemp.”
“Chips from Sci-fi.”
“Cupcakes from Script.”
“Milk shakes from Action.”
“Salads from Adventure.”
“Nuts from Fantasy.”
“Smoothies from Mystery.”
“Frozen fruit Illu-fi.”
“Bagels from Folklore.”
“Water from Non-fi.”
(447 words)

It wasn’t long after they all ate their food and hid all evidence of the feast, when there came a knock on their cabin door.
People from some cabins stood there angrily and Hybri waved, “Hi… allies and enemies. What brings you to our cabin?”
“We want to say thanks to Cae over here.” Moonlit grins.
“What did I do?”
“You stole all our food!” CJ exclaims.
“Sorry?”
“I told you!” Pepper exclaims.
“Pepper, you didn’t say anything! You were like, yay food!” Cherry interrupts.
“Cherry, you idiot! We might have gotten away with it, if you hadn’t literally given away that we actually did it, and plus, you were the one to suggest that we eat it!” A smacks Cherry, who is sitting on the floor.
“A, you gave away that we ate it all!” Hybri slams the door into the people’s faces and locks the door.
“This is fate, only the god or goddess who put the idea into the person who got us into this mess can save us now,” Silvi mock bows to Cae and collapses onto the chair nearest to her.

Suddenly the tension increased, as they realized that the host of this session should not find out about this, and then a heated argument over the food started. Cae, the one who came up with the reckless idea, was sitting on the tallest chair, her eyebrows frowning as she heard their ideas on how to stop this from becoming bigger.
Hybri chimed in, “You should've known we couldn't keep it hidden for long! We should replace the food we took.”
Silvi, the cunning one, disagreed, “Why should we? Let's just decline everything and blackmail someone else for a change.”
Pepper, the voice of reason, interjected, “No, that won't solve anything. We should just apologize and face the consequences.”
Cherry, ever impulsive, added, “Let's do it again, but smarter this time! Then we can give food and it’ll look like we didn’t do anything!”
The rest shook their heads, rejecting the reckless idea. Cae retorted, “You all helped! It's not just my fault!”
A refused, “No, if you hadn’t stolen the food, then this wouldn’t have happened!”
Like a knight in shining armor, one of the hosts brought the largest mango in the existence, into the cabin, in the process, shoving down all the other cabin leaders and said in their all regal voice, “Tragedy, this mango is for giving us a great idea for another daily and an amazing weekly that will show up soon.”
(421 words)



At that moment, the whole Tragedy cabin seems to wake up because of a terrible knocking at their door.
They open the door and one of the hosts stand there.
“I heard how you all stole a ton of food, so to make amends, you have to steal food from the kitchen, but I will have people watching out for you and inorder for me to forgive you, you have to get all the food back and give it back to the cabin you stole it from.“
Cae grins.
Later, during the different meal times, they each sneak into the kitchen and steal some of the snacks from earlier and after the last person, they go back to the cabin and check that they have all the food necessary.
“Toffee from tragedy.”
“Crackers from Hi-Fi.”
“Chocolate from Myth.”
“Juice form Lyric.”
“Cookies from Steampunk.”
“Ice cream from Thriller.”
“Cheese from Real-Fi.”
“Fruits from Poetry.”
“Popcorn from Thriller.”
“Dried fruit from Dystopian.”
“Granola from Lit-fi.”
“Snack bars from Contemp.”
“Chips from Sci-fi.”
“Cupcakes from Script.”
“Milk shakes from Action.”
“Salads from Adventure.”
“Nuts from Fantasy.”
“Smoothies from Mystery.”
“Frozen fruit Illu-fi.”
“Bagels from Folklore.”
“Water from Non-fi.”
Then they all go to the cabins, knock on the door, and leave the food there and return to their cabin.
”That was a terrible experience," Cherry claims flopping onto Hybri who is already half asleep again.
Everyone goes to either now write or do some other random stuff with people and the rest fo the cabins decided to forgive tragedy.
(257 words)



Silvi: @silverlynx-
Cherry: @cherrymango17
Hybri: @Hybritized
A: @fc_ghshsh
Cae: @Caesious
Pepper: @jalapeno9
Wild: @-WildClan-
Mouse: @Mouseloverr
Twi: @TWILIGHT_A
Iris: @Eeveedonut
Moonlit: @moonlitseas
CJ: @cb2jkl


Total: 2305 words

Twinkle, twinkle, fading star,
Life's journey seems so bizarre.
Dreams we chase, hopes we hold,
But sometimes, paths are far from gold.
In the dark, we stumble and we fall,
Yet, rise again, standing tall.

Twinkle in the sky so high, don't lose sight, don't wonder why.
Twinkle in the sky so high, through the tears, we'll still defy.
Twinkle in the sky so high, finding strength as time goes by.

Like a shooting star we soar, through life's open door,
Gaining strength, we'll shine from afar, like never before.
Through the storms, we'll weather and try,
As shooting stars, we light up the sky.

In the rhythm of “Midnight Serenade,” our souls ignite,
A symphony of dreams, we'll play tonight.
Guided by the melody of fate's sweet embrace,
We'll dance through challenges we face.
With harmonies of hope and love's refrain,
“Midnight Serenade” echoes, healing every pain.
In every note, a story to unveil,
As shooting stars, our destinies prevail.

Amidst the whispering leaves and moonlit skies,
We danced beneath the stars, with spirits that rise.
In the forest's embrace, we made our solemn vow,
But now we're caught in shadows, wondering how.

THE MIST-THE ETERNAL FOG-NOVEL
Chapter 1: The Eternal Fog

( It was a foggy day, All the people stayed indoors because of the fear of getting lost in the eternal fog)
Miya said, “ Mum, When will the fog be lifted? It's been nearly a week and I want to play outdoors with my friends.” Miya's mum, Not knowing how to answer and was still in a puzzled state when Miya's older sister, Carmi spoke up, “ Miya, don't worry Everything is going to be okay and wanna play a game of Chess? Let's see who will win?” Miya sprinted towards her room to get her Chess board and coins and Mum was still worried as the groceries at home were getting over and was confused on how to get all the important stuff when they were supposed to stay indoors. Carmi sensed her mum's worried expression and thus reassured her mum that she and her mist will go out for that and then disappeared into thin air. Mum understood her and when Miya came she played Chess with her.
The Mist was a secret spy agency founded by Carmi to protect those in need. The mist consisted of Carmi( The leader and a spy)The Eternal Fog seemed suspicious and bank robberies have been taking place across town. This was worrying everyone and the mist even more. They had to do something about it and Every person in the town were counting on them to protect them from this eternal fog and make sure it is gone for good. With this high pressure, the question is, “ Will they Save the town from the Eternal Fog?” Well, This was the same question which rose in the heart and mind of the team members of the mist.

The mist was made up of 4 members, Carmi-The leader and a super stealth spy, Davian- The Hacker, Rose- The Doctor, Hawk- A Robotics engineer and a weirdo who wanted to be a spy and so spy in training.

The mist arrived at their Meeting point–The Shop. It was actually like the head quarters of the Mist, It consisted of a main place to discuss, A lab for Rose, A workshop for Hawk, A Techy room for Davian and a Training room for Carmi.

They all came to the Head Quarter or HQ of the Shop. Carmi started the conversation, “ We all know why we are here so the same speech I guess so What should we do about the eternal fog, Any Ideas?” Rose Spoke up, “ Well, I can test the gas of the Eternal fog so that I can find a way to remove it.”
“That's Excellent, I will get a Sample for you to test.” said Carmi.

(Now they had somewhere to start it so I guess The End where it is just the beginning of a new Venture.)

Fourth Weekly

TW: Death

PART ONE: Ancient Times

Twisted Nursery Rhyme - Verse 1 (Ring-Around-the-Rosie)

I circle the roses
One last time
The scent they enclose it
Smells like crime
A pocket of posies
In their prime
They fall to the ground
Layin’ right beside

I’d always opposed the
One night rides
They’d always suppose
I’d never lie
But once I expose
They drop their pride
But you played to the end
Such a shame you died

Mythological Creature Factfile

The tondru is an interesting creature. It resembles the Earthen doe in its build, although it does have the antlers of a buck. The tondru typically has violet eyes and bluish-green fur, though the female has darker fur and lighter eyes than the male. The tondru lives in the wild and is mostly located in the Forests of Clarenmont. It is widely perceived to be an herbivore, but this is a common misconception, as there have been multiple sightings of tondrai eating etrenes and their eggs. Tondrai are not easily domesticated animals. They travel in herds of odd numbers, the lowest seen being five and the highest being nineteen. They communicate with each other through a series of clicks inaudible to humans.

The tondru was first discovered in the twenty-third year of the reign of King Antonio. It was found after a unique celestial sight the night before. The animal was the first indication that there was another realm beyond Kalant, due to its abnormal fur color (#125970). It has been assumed that although the color makes the creature stand out in this realm, it is a helpful means of camouflage. King Oberon deemed the animal monarchically protected. No one except the King is permitted to own them, whether for labor or exhibition. The King has two of them featured in the palace stables.They are named Espial and Strike.

Scientists estimate that tondrai have the ability to teleport between realms, to navigate that gray space between Kalant and Osheterra. However, this has never been proven, factually or otherwise. Evidence suggests that this would be the only possible way the animal could have come from the other realm, as no known human has ever successfully been transported to Osheterra (see Archive 65A — Illes Explorerel).

Tondrai are borderline endangered, but thanks to the royal protection given by King Oberon, they are beginning to reproduce and populate the forests again. Tondrai’s main predators are pelixes, as the carnivorous creatures seem to particularly enjoy the tondru’s meat. However, tondrai are good fighters and are known for their organized evasive maneuvers to avoid being eaten. Senior scientists say that this was not a tactic employed by early tondrai, but rather something they adopted after discovering that their camouflage was no longer a benefit. One of these schemes involves a tondru (normally the alpha female) expelling a gas not olfactive to humans, but fetid to animals (most notably, pelixes), driving away predators.

PART TWO: Distant Past

Prechorus
I didn’t wanna hurt you
I thought you were true
But I had to desert you
When I found out you were you

I really had preferred to
Believe through and through
But what kind of person
Would I be if I’d just let you flew

Tragic Ending
Zephyr gripped his knife and looked over at Four, who had her bow at the ready, arrow taut on the string. Zephyr peeked over the top of the rock, then sat back down. He looked at Four again, but more carefully this time, knowing it could very well be the last time he saw her. This is what war does. It reminds you that any moment could be your last. She was breathing fast, holding her bow too tight. She wouldn’t be able to maneuver. “Four,” he said gently. She jumped, sending an arrow into an unfortunate tree. Zephyr winced at the sound the impact made. “Calm down,” he instructed. “It’s gonna be okay. Breathe.” “I am,” she responded through gritted teeth. “Are you hurt?” he asked concernedly. She shook her head. “Just…terrified.” Zephyr smiled wryly. “So am I,” he admitted. Four gave him a dubious look. “I’m just better at hiding it,” he added. She made a sound that could’ve meant anything as she notched another arrow. “It’ll be okay, Four. Just breathe. In.” He took a deep breath and released it. “Out. Can you do that for me? In.” The pair inhaled in unison. “Out.” They exhaled as he said the word. “Now loosen your grip on that bow. You won’t be able to move it like that.” Four did as he said. “Now. Are you okay?” “I’m fine,” she said through a shaky exhale. “You’re fine. I’m fine. Everybody’s fine.” “For now.” Zephyr shook his head. “What happened to the eternally optimistic Four that used to mildly irritate me?” Four clenched her teeth. “I think she died with her brother.” She looked at her watch. “One more minute.” “Think of Six,” Zephyr said, biting his lip even as he said it. “What about him?” “Do you think he’d want you to take over his role as the pessimistic Sylvan?” Four smiled, though she pressed her lips together, trying to hide it. “He was so pessimistic. He once referred to a glass that was half-full as ‘grieving.’ According to him, the other half went missing and the water that was left had finally accepted that its sibling was probably dead. It was depressing.” “That sounds like Six.” “Yeah,” Four said wistfully. “Yeah, it does.” Four’s watch beeped. Zephyr looked at Four seriously. “Ready?” Four looked back, her face set. “For Six?” Zephyr smiled sadly. “Yeah. For Six.” They stood up. “Attacco!” Zephyr screamed. The army charged. Zephyr ran into battle, leaving Four to incapacitate targets from the safety of the rock. Zephyr fought skillfully, dodging weapons left and right. He fought his way through the thick of it until finally he saw Reut, fighting off three Experimenteds. He took an arrow out of his quiver and stabbed one in the heart with it, kicking her to the ground. Another he beaned with his bow, but it barely fazed the Experimented, who aimed to punch Reut in the face. But, to both Zephyr’s and the Experimented’s surprise, Reut caught the fist, crumpling it within his armored grasp. The Experimented emitted a groan of pain. Reut kicked him to the ground, leaving him clutching his broken fist beside his fallen comrade. The last Experimented Zephyr recognized. Tryx. Her short, neat baby blue hair was the only color on the entire battlefield. No. He broke into a run, already knowing he wouldn’t reach her in time. The fight seemed to go in slow-motion. Tryx rushed the armored soldier, impassioned and infuriated. She swung her two knives in no organized manner, slicing at any piece of open skin she could find. Reut took her by the neck, lifting her off her feet. Tryx writhed, kicking him, stabbing at his hands, screaming unintelligibly, even as her face turned blue. Finally, she went limp. Reut threw her to the ground like she was a rag doll. Zephyr finally reached him. He positioned his knife to go straight into the core of Reut’s armor, but Reut turned to meet him, a knife already in hand. Tryx’s knife, he realized, a second too late, as the knife went straight through him. Reut removed his helmet, smiling widely. “I’ve been waiting for this,” he said in his raspy voice. “Zephyr Waywood. One of our best enemies. Finally finished.” Reut turned away, letting Zephyr fall.

Zephyr felt weak, but also strong. Hot, but also cold. Tired, yet somehow, wide awake. He opened his eyes, smiling wistfully. “Christopher.” Chris stood in front of him. “I missed you,” Zephyr rasped. “I know,” he replied, and those two words broke Zephyr. He embraced his friend, holding him tightly. He felt Christopher hug him back. “I missed you too.” “What happened?” Zephyr asked through tears as Christopher stepped back. “The same thing that always happens. But you blink once and you miss it,” a familiar voice said from behind him. Zephyr turned around. The owner of the voice smiled at him, that same slightly twisted, crooked, imperfectly perfect smile Zephyr had yearned for for much too long. “Six.”

PART THREE: Current Day

Idiom-Based Chorus (Devil's in the details)
The devil’s in the details
At first glance you seemed perfection
But then you started to grow scales
Master of misdirection
It started to go off the rails
Snakes don’t well take rejection
No clue what loving you entailed
You don’t deserve affection
Our loving was brief
Something all can determine
But I’m not the cheat
You are, you low-down dirty vermin

SUSwc Workshop
ONE
“I’m not you!” Dian screamed back. Daya froze as a memory hit her like a semitruck.

She stood in front of her brother’s door, wanting to enter, but at the same time, afraid to. She knew it was her fault. She knew she shouldn’t have left him. She knew he blamed her as much as she blamed herself. Penelope walked by her on her way to her home office. The woman froze, and turned around. “Daya.” Daya looked up. Penelope gave her an encouraging nod. “Just talk to him. He’ll understand.” Daya bit her lip. “But what if he doesn’t?” “He’s your brother. He will,” Penelope smiled. Daya turned back to the door. She opened it. Inside, her brother sat on his bed, legs crossed, reading a book. Noticing the flicker of movement in his vision, he looked up. “What do you want?” he signed, his expression neutral. Daya’s hands rose out of habit, but she found she had nothing to sign. Zona looked at her expectantly. “I’m sorry,” she finally signed. Zona looked back down, closing his book. He rubbed at a spot on his upper right arm. “You told me to leave you alone. To stop being so needy. Such a bother.” He looked up to see her response. “I know,” Daya signed. “I’m sorry,” she repeated. “I was tired. I was frustrated.” “At me.” Daya was halfway through ‘no’ before she realized that would be a lie. “Yeah.” “I didn’t ask for this, you know,” Zona signed forcefully. “I’ve been thinking about it. If I wasn’t Deaf, none of this would have happened. If I wasn’t Deaf, you wouldn’t have to translate for me. If I wasn’t Deaf, I could have my own friends. I could live my own life. You could live yours.” Even though all of that was true, Daya still felt a pang in her heart. “If you weren’t Deaf, you wouldn’t be you,” she signed slowly. “I’m still not me. I’m who you make me.” Daya looked at him curiously. “I see you. You talk to your friends about me all the time. Who am I then?” Zona asked. “I’m whoever it’s convenient for me to be. I’m you, I’m an accessory to you, and it’s ridiculous, Daya.” “That’s not true—” “Then explain to me why Shawn Penn clapped me on the back last week and congratulated me on my A. How does he even know I got an A?” “First of all, his name is Sean. S-e-a-n,” Daya corrected. “Really?” Zona glared at her. “Second of all, I didn’t tell him you got an A. You think I just go around telling people what grade you get on stuff?” “I wouldn’t be surprised,” Zona replied. “Seriously?” “Dead serious.” “Okay, sure, maybe I brag about you. And maybe I exaggerate a little, but I don’t make you anything,” Daya signed. “It doesn’t even matter, because who I am isn’t yours to share. It’s mine to show,” Zona told her. “OH MY GOSH!” Daya screamed out loud. “I came in here to try to apologize to you, but all you’re doing is blaming me for stuff. I don’t do whatever exactly it is you think I do behind your back. If you don’t believe me, I don’t care. I’m done.” She walked out.

TWO
“Your aura is blue,” the girl said, her light pink eyes fixed on mine. “What does that mean?” I asked. “It means you’re going to change the world,” Director Lansing said, her gaze sharp. “No one has had a blue aura in over a century, Mister Dante. Pray tell, what or who has taken it upon themselves to bless you with such a curse?” She strode down the stairway until she was face-to-face with me. “I have no idea. I don’t even know what a blue aura is. My whole family has yellow auras, that’s what I was supposed to get!” I exclaimed panickedly. “Interesting,” Lansing said. “You’ve never heard the rhyme? Green is for gardens, yellow’s for labor, orange is for defense, red means you’re favored. Pink means you test us, violet’s wrong, blue is for only the so very strong.” “You, you mean you’re relying on a children’s rhyme to determine my fate?” I asked incredulously. “In short, yes. Personally, I find it interesting that you’re the one meant to execute the vision.” “The what? I’m supposed to do what?” I repeated, alarmed. Lansing smiled — no, she smirked. The head of the Department of Aura Analysis and Categorization smirked at me. “You’ll see.”

THREE
She takes me to an empty room where the walls are mirrors. “What are we doing here exactly?” I ask, doing my best to conceal my nervousness. “You’re going to see the Augur.” “The what?” I repeat. “What’s an augur?” “She’s the one that created the nursery rhyme. And she’s the one that’s going to tell you your future.” Lansing puts a hand on my shoulder. “Try not to scream when you see the cat. She loves that cat.” “I’m sorry?” I say incredulously. “Good luck.” Lansing walks out, letting the door slam shut behind her. The lights go out, and when they come back on, I am staring into the face of a wrinkled old lady who smiles at me. “Alexander Dante. Possessor of the Blue Aura. It’s a pleasure to finally meet you.

PART FOUR: DISTANT FUTURE

Bridge Based off Famous Song Title (Last Night by Morgan Wallen)

Last night I scattered flowers ‘neath the moon
Last night I sat for hours needing you
But today, I don’t miss you at all
Don’t regret a thing
Climbed up from the free falls
Of love
And of the pain here thereof

So you can take your kisses
‘Cause it’s plain as un, deux, trois
I don’t wanna be in love with a lying, cheating, Kaa

Steampunk Era Object (Wall)
I hold up my lanyard to the security camera and glare at it. “I am the literal manager of this EPP, why can’t I get in?” “I’m sorry, Miss Cassian, but we’re on lockdown. Nobody comes in or out.” “Why are you on lockdown?” I demand. The man on the other end of the intercom hesitates. “Why are you on lockdown?” I repeat, this time more forcefully. “A pipe burst,” the man said, and I could hear him wince. “A pipe burst,” I say, my voice deadly calm. “When, precisely, did it burst?” “About three hours ago, miss.” “Three-” I suck in a deep breath. “Why wasn’t I called?” I ask, doing my absolute best to keep my tone even. “We didn’t realize until about twenty minutes ago.” I take my hand off the button that turns on the microphone. “I am fully convinced this plant is run by idiots.” I press the button again. “How does it take you two hours and forty minutes to find out a pipe has burst? The smell alone is worse than a thousand rotten eggs.” “I guess nobody was paying attention.” I massage my temples as I bang on the metal wall that separates me from the rest of the plant. “Well at least you had the competency to go into lockdown,” I mutter. “How long will it take to repair the damage?” The man doesn’t respond. “Bartholomew? Barnaby? Whatever your name is? How long?” “With the lack of people, we’re gonna need at least three to five days.” “Of course you will,” I murmur. “Do you need any more supplies?” “No, ma’am.” “Awesome. Can you put Briar Lange on the line, please?” “Of course, ma’am.” There’s a rustling sound as I hear him pass off the microphone and mutter, “She’s in a bad mood.” I roll my eyes. “Briar?” “Hey, Wynn.” “You’re in charge. Don’t let anybody contact anyone until tomorrow. I need to get this news to the Executives and I do not need them hearing about it before I get there.” “Understood.” I look up at the wall. The wall does its job, even as it infuriates me. It’s molecularly sealed to keep any escaped steam from getting out into the rest of the town. Made out of the strongest metal around, it’s virtually impenetrable — even by gas. The town should be safe. The people inside…that could be a different story.

PART FIVE: The End

Final Chorus - Slightly Altered

The devil’s in the details
At first glance you seemed perfection
But then you started to grow scales
Master of misdirection
It went completely off the rails
You cannot take rejection
Before too long it was unveiled
You won’t be resurrected
I’ll never repeat
This near-deadly mistake
And I won’t fall in love again
With a venomous snake

It Was All A Dream…
My eyes fly open. The woman’s voice still resonates in my head, the memories of my travels still bright in my mind. I look around. I’m on my bed…in my room? No. You’re kidding. AJR plays through my headphones. An empty Google Doc is open on my computer. I face the ceiling. It couldn’t have been…a dream? No, no. I distinctly remembered that weird…blimp? Is that what it was? “It’s too hard to tell, if anything’s real or not,” Jack Met sings. “Shut up, Jack,” I mutter, pushing myself to a sitting position. There was…I went to three different eras. Or was it four? Dang it, Logan, remember. “Um…” I picked up a notebook and flipped to an empty page, not even caring (for once) about its designated purpose. “Old times. Mythological characters. And then…it was…depressing? Did I cry?” That part is hazy, but I write it down anyway. “And then I was in the present. Something to do with Among Us, I think. And…there was a blimp!” I crow triumphantly. “It was weirdly steamy there.” I sit back. “And the lady. Who was like…the end? Not sure.” That part didn’t make any sense. Either way, I write it down. I stare at the page for at least fifteen minutes, maybe longer. Finally, my mom calls me downstairs for dinner. I set the notebook aside and go downstairs to eat. After all, all that time-traveling, whether real or not, did make me hungry.

Code and Certificate: https://scratch.mit.edu/projects/878237640/

7/28/23
314 words

Daily:
There are no dailies from the daily team today— instead, you'll be coming up with your own daily! Come up with a daily in the comments that has a 300 word requisite. Then, choose and complete somebody else's daily to earn 400 points!

Daily from @mydoggiedaisy: write a 300 word wanted poster for a company that uses goldfish cracker powder as lawn fertilizer and kills grass
—
WANTED: Goldie Fishmiester of Goldie's Fish Keepers

Local police are currently searching for Goldie Fishmiester, the founder of company Goldie's Fish Keepers. Goldie is a 32-year old female with Caucasian skin, short orange hair, and wears black glasses. She also always has goldfish powder in her hair, no matter how hard she tries to wash it out. Goldie is accused of false advertisement to promote her brand Goldie's Fish Keepers.

While the company presented their products to the public as a way to remove the crusty powder you get on your fingers after eating a bag of goldfish, an anonymous tip has revealed that instead of being thrown out, this powder is later imported to Larry's Lawn Fertilizer, a Canadian company that specializes in gardening products. The powder would be turned into fake lawn fertilizer and sold to the public without any suspicions.

There have been many reported cases of innocent Canadians using this fertilizer on their grass and later reporting their plants dying. The farming economy of the country has collapsed, and the prime minister is blaming Fish Keepers for the catastrophe.

Yesterday, Goldie was reported missing by a close friend. While the owner of Larry's has been arrested already, Goldie is still on the run. Police have obtained images of her on the run with a giant barracuda knife and consider her armed and dangerous. Citizens with any questions are encouraged to contact local law enforcement immediately. Those who are able to find Goldie and turn her in will receive a prize of one hundred thousand dollars and one hundred party sized bags of goldfish crackers. Spread the word if you can.

Meanwhile, if you have crops or grass that have been damaged by Larry's Lawn Fertilizer or have used Goldie's Fish Keepers' products, you may be entitled to compensation. Please dial your local mayor to find out the specifics of this.

July 28th Daily

Again, Annora had to run. By and by, they had found her. Craning her neck to see beyond the mist the waterfall created, she ran faster. Damian Kit ran alongside her, his long legs propelling him on the rocky ground. “Everything ends here, Annora!” he shouted, barely out of breath. First, they’d have to catch her. Gearing up for what she was about to do, Annora felt her body tense up, just the slightest bit. How could she do this? In her mind, she knew it was necessary, but in her heart, it hurt. Just one last moment. Kit called to her again, his voice harsh. “Leave and you can’t come back!” Make hard choices. Nana’s voice rang in Annora’s head. Only, she didn’t know if she could. Predicting what Kit would do, knowing he couldn’t get to her yet, she stopped at the edge of the waterfall. Quite a distance, the voice in her head noted dryly. “Really?” Annora muttered. Seriously. This was her last chance. Unaware of the dangers that lied before her, she jumped.

Vast was the abyss that lay beneath the land of Rai. Wide was the land beneath the abyss.

“Xerox,” Quinn pronounced. “You need to fix the Xerox machine. Zap it or something.” “All right, chill out,” Howard replied moodily. “Bro, I’ll chill out when the heater starts working,” she replied. “Cameron, what’s our status?” “Defective,” Cameron replied disappointedly. “Everything’s backfired. First the monitor was screwed, now the software itself is busted.” “Great,” Quinn muttered. “How are we supposed to run a business when nothing works right?” she demanded of the ceiling. “If Murphy’s Law was real, I’d blame that at this point,” said the typically rational Alohi from the corner. “Just great,” Quinn repeated. “Kanoa’s even getting fanciful.” “Let’s not get too hasty,” Alohi said alarmedly. “My exact words were, ‘if Murphy’s Law were real.’ Not a chance in the world that I would get fanciful about something so mundane as a Xerox machine.” “Okay, but stuff still isn’t working,” Quinn replied with an eye roll. “Pretend it is,” a deep voice said from the corner of the room. Quinn marched over to where Rangi, Alohi’s brother, was lounging on an office chair and snatched his phone out his hand. Rangi looked up indignantly. “Skylar was just about to say who he liked! That’s illegal,” he protested, pointing at Quinn accusingly. “Universal Consequences is not an excuse not to help us,” Alohi informed her brother. Viciously, Rangi snatched his phone out of Quinn’s grasp and plopped back down in his seat. “We might as well take a break,” Howard said from behind the Xerox machine. “Xiomara?” Rangi screeched, clearly displeased. “You don’t love Xiomara! You love Zuri! Zuri is the girl for you!”

daily july 28

https://scratch.mit.edu/users/SuperNaturalPages/ Personify a plant, season, or something else in nature and write 300 words from its P.O.V.

Deep in caverns, or down in a well, the walls are filled with my voice calling out to you as you have called out to me. But I do not have a way to speak the words that are in my mind and so I repeat yours back to you, back to you, back to you. I am just an echo and you will never truly hear my voice or know what it is that I want to say to you. You call out for me, “echo, echo,” and in the canyon or in the mountains, I am there and I hear you. The hard rocks give me strength and I call back to you, “echo, echo.” but I wish I had a way to speak the words that are really on my mind. The cave I am in is full of mysteries, it feels like a world frozen in time, the stalactites and stalagmites jutting out like teeth. If I am the voice, then it is the mouth. You are the mind that decides what I say, but how I wish I could choose that myself. We could discuss the wonders of the cave. I could learn what it is like to speak the words I wish. But when you stand at the edge of the canyon, with your hands cupped over your mouth, I feel the awe that you feel, though I have been in this canyon for all eternity. I feel your joy when you shout and I shout back to you, but all you will hear is your own voice. I am an echo, the voice of the canyons, the caverns, the caves, the wells, and the mountain. I am your words spoken back to you, a repeated message, but I am a voice that has many words it cannot say, cannot say

July 28th Daily
333 words

Mine What genres do you dislike reading? What tropes and cliches make you cringe? What character archetypes have you vowed to never use in your own writing? Think of all those themes you find in writing that you don’t like. Challenge yourself to write 300 words using some writing /thing/ you detest. (So for example, if I dislike cheesy romances, I write a cheesy romance :’) )

@Mydoggiedaisy write a 300 word wanted poster for a company that uses goldfish cracker powder as lawn fertilizer and kills grass

Have you or your grass been a victim to Goldfish Lawn Fertilizer? Have you had to experience the pain of watching your precious shoots of grass wither up and die at the hands of a fertilizer that was supposed to help? There’s no doubt that while Goldfish snack crackers are delicious, Pepperidge Farm took things too far when they introduced their Goldfish Lawn Fertilizer. This dangerous product has claimed the lives of thousands of lawns across the country, and has been the cause of many homeowner’s lawn related sufferings. Goldfish Lawn Fertilizer has been marketed as a “beneficial - and delicious! solution to all your lawn needs”, but this slogan couldn’t be further from the truth. Pepperidge Farm makes Goldfish Lawn Fertilizer out of their extra Goldfish snack crackers. Any crackers that don’t make it into the box are crushed up and relabeled as fertilizer. This fertilizer is extremely dangerous to innocent lawns. Goldfish powder is made of 100% real cheddar cheese and salt. Feeding your grass cheddar cheese is very unhealthy for positive lawn growth and typically does more harm than good. Goldfish Lawn Fertilizer is just a tricky way for Pepperidge Farm to make more money off their excess Goldfish. Pepperidge Farm, the name behind Goldfish Lawn Fertilizer and other Goldfish related snacks, is highly sought after for compensation for destroyed homeowners’ lawns. However, Pepperidge Farm is just another subsidiary company. The true monster behind the pain of innocent blades of grass is none other than the Campbell Soup Company. That’s right. The Campbell Soup Company is wanted for retribution for the ruin of lawns across the country. They currently have a lot to answer for. Homeowners are seeking to sue on behalf of their lawns, many are searching for compensation, and in home improvement stores everywhere, angry customers are trying to return their purchased Goldfish Lawn Fertilizer to no avail. So if you or anyone you know come in contact with the Campbell Soup Company, don't hesitate to call authorities immediately.

July 28th — Daily 28
396 words

Aria was the picture of a normal college student: always busy, never punctual, and rarely content in her day-to-day life. To many, she seemed to be a regular girl, but only a few witnessed her deep inner struggle kept hidden from the world.

Her life had been marked by tragedy, beginning in childhood with the death of her parents. Without a family, Aria was forced to suddenly learn to take care of herself, to become independent. Inside was a different story—she was broken, convinced that she was alone in the world.

Growing up in a distant part of town, Aria was surrounded by issues and challenges. Poverty, addiction, and violence were chronic in the it.

She would sit for hours, strumming a guitar and writing lyrics, pouring her pain into each note. She was a singer herself.

…

A morning after exam season, Aria walked into town square, a large commotion hear from afar. She stood by the front of the crowd, the lyrics of a song tackling the fears of her past.

It was to the somber melody of a familiar song that she felt a part of her heal. The strains of ‘over the rainbow’ brought back memories of her parents, and if even for a moment, Aria felt connected to them again. It was their favourite song, and Aria knew it would shortly become hers. Her source of strength, the one thing helping to stay at peace.

Aria slowly looked up to the sky, remembering her struggles.

It was tough.

She had come a long way from her troubled past. She had pursued her passions and had been able to overcome her demons. Music had only given her a purpose and the song that had given her hope had become a part of her. She knew what the soloist felt, as he finished the song to thunderous applause and stepped back, overcome with emotion. Singing that song in front of the crowd meant he wasn't alone. He was surrounded by the love of those who sang along and embraced his message.

Something Aria always worked hard to feel.

She learned to have faith in the future, in all the good things that layed ahead.

This was the power of music. Aria had found a way to survive and thrive. She had created her own story and had done so to a single song.

July 28, 2023

I’ve seen so many things in my life. Whatever you name, I’ve seen it. Every single fantastical scenario or one in a million chance, I’ve seen it. Yet, there are certain aspects of life that never fail to surprise me. There’s a certain charm to watching the human race evolve and face problem after problem, progressing through era after era. It seems the stone age was just yesterday. Now, in a world with inflation and climate change, I feel like I’m watching a completely different movie.

I definitely feel a lot of pain and frustration from not being able to interfere with the trivial yet quite frankly stupid decisions the human race makes. No matter what I do, I can only live and continue living. I can only guide those who have passed to the stars. No matter how much I want to yell at people and say what I want to say, I can’t.

Over the years I’ve learned to keep my mind disassociated. To not care too much and not invest too deeply. It’s worked out in my favor quite nicely. I like the carefree life I abide by, and I wouldn’t change it for anything.

The black metal fence surrounding the garden of oaks, roses, mulch, blueberries; you would think it's such an insignificant scene. I’ve seen millions and billions of backyards. Surely this one isn’t anything special. Yet the small but lively backyard has an essence I have never once experienced. Such a phenomenon is so unusual that I did not realize it at first. Everything has a life essence, an aura if you will, symbolizing different things. Humans give off air that has freshly rained. Plants give off an oaky smell. Technology gives a weird sophisticated aura.

I was very much surprised when the backyard omitted a very clear aura. The aura of humans. An essence I am all too familiar with. For a while I thought there was a human hiding in the backyard, but I quickly realized that was not the case. Still, I have no idea why.

Today, I’m determined to find out. I might not get this opportunity again. Something has finally sparked my interest. It’s time I take it.

369 words

7/28/2023
- amount: 430
- daily by @loveydove668 (Write an advertisement of at least 300 words for a shampoo based on the last thing you ate.)

idk i just wanted to write dystopian today

Somewhere in the depths of a house, a girl sits in front of a television, waiting for her favorite show to come on. She huddles in her blankets, staring blankly ahead. An advertisement plays as she waits.

A black and white video starts playing, showing a filthy boy sitting in the grass. The sun shines down on his face, making him squint. His mother stands above him, hands on her hips.

“John!” she says, her voice too methodical, too forced, “get in the house and take a bath!”

The boy looks up at his mother and says, “It’ll take too much time.”

At this she smiles, flashing her pearly whites. From seemingly out of nowhere brings out a brown shampoo bottle and says, “Well, I got this shampoo from Twin Brothers Inc. that’ll clean you up in a jiffy!”

She uncaps the bottle and bends down to hand it to her son. A chocolatey aroma floats from the bottle, all consuming and toxic.

He tips the contents out, a few bread crumbs tumbling out with the liquid. John shows no sign of disgust, his face perfectly still. He rubs it over his arms, and the dirt magically disappears in a matter of seconds.

“Wow!” he shouts, “This really fixed me up!”

The screen cuts and two identical twins in ironed suits stand in front of a counter. Their wide smiles do not reach their eyes.

Some poor soul had turned the gamma up so their wrinkled faces were vivid and blinding. Most people do not want to see business men with their hair slicked back, fake smiles, beards cleanly shaved off but the girl struggled forward, wanting the prize at the end.

“Buy our shampoo today at only $6.99!” says the taller twin.

“Like pure witchcraft, it is as soft as a baby’s bottom!”

That was not the right thing to say. Their faces are still smiling as the screen fizzes out, crimson splattering the screen. They do not scream, they do not react at all.

Words start to appear on the old television screen.

The faces of the twins appear. Music she hears when her father is having a good day starts playing, like a music box.

Over their heads in a large, bold font, “CALL 911-BREAD-SHAMPOO FOR THE NEWEST, CLEANEST SHAMPOO”. A bottle of shampoo flecked with black spots like pieces of chocolate floats in the middle of the men.

A bright red light flashes from the screen, and the show the girl had been waiting all week to air begins to play.

The girl is already asleep.

7/28 - 325 words of the daily “have a character write a letter to their past or future self” from @opheliio (i chose future)

Dear Verity,
I need help, and you are perhaps the only person I can turn to. I know this is breaking the laws of everything we have and will work towards, but you are the only person that could even get me to the point where those laws exist. Please, help. I need you. Azhenra needs you, if you would accept her call.
There is nothing I can do except hope you can see my message, and await your response. It is the fourteenth of the Syladrus cycle and I’m tired. There’s everything to do and the time for none of it, as I am sure you can understand; but you have made it through this period of time, and I beg you- give me your best advice. I need to mitigate my struggles, and you are the only one I can trust not to take this opportunity to sabotage me instead.
To truly convey my message’s urgency, however, I will mention this; On the first day, you may recall that I holed up in my bedroom with three boxes of candles, a tin of Mother’s morning tea blend, and a stack of papers. Currently, I am down to the last two candles, and as the papers continue to pile in the tea is losing its effectiveness; with each passing hour, it becomes harder to force my eyes open and stay awake. Abahan warned me of the effects of sleep deprivation, but as you know it is the only way to complete my goals- however, even this route is slowly closing itself off to me, and I fear I am at the point where if I continue for much longer I shall perish.
I do not ask for much more than you can give; however, please grant me at least this- a guiding light to bring me the strength I need, and some hope to carry me through the coming days.

Yours truly,
Verity Aves