Daily 5
I have to make a smoothie out of a pillow. Let's hope they taste good…
210 words


Are you tired? Exhausted? Sleep deprived? Well, SWC Co.'s Sleep Smoothie will cure all of that!

The Sleep Smoothie is made out of premium pillows- Yes, pillows! That have been stolen kindly donated from the homes of people who get plenty of sleep! These pillows are blended with care, then mixed in with some real moondust to make what we know as the Sleep Smoothie. It's packaged carefully with high-tech machines that make sure no smoothie has any imperfections that can make your experience worse.

Once you drink a Sleep Smoothie, you'll start to feel very sleepy (and notice the tasty, feathery flavors of the pillows). Don't worry, this is normal! Make sure to lay down somewhere comfortable because you'll be asleep in as soon as 3 minutes. After this, you'll sleep soundly for around 8 to 9 hours. Even better, the Sleep Smoothie is designed to make sure you have the best of dreams. Say goodbye to nightmares, because this is the key to a good night's sleep!

If this advertisement has made you want to buy yourself a Sleep Smoothie, then go to your nearby store fast! It might get sold out before you notice. (There will also be free samples located at the Main Cabin of SWC.)

7/4/2023
- object: binder
- amount: 388

4th of july is the only holiday that pains me
i hear the fireworks
but i cannot see
i’m going to go insane

against all possible logic and reason, she had done it.

the smoothie was complete.

the ingredients? a little bit of metal there, some paper here, dandruff, plastic of course, and a spoonful of lead! oh, and lots of pain. lots and lots.

the blender had almost exploded as she held down the lid with all her might, her muscles aching afterwards. the glass started to crack midway through, and she was absolutely sure that the glass would send her to the hospital—why did she ever think this was a good idea? but she continued, and held on for dear life.

but the finishing result satisfied her. her hard work had not been in vain.

it looked completely as she had expected. grey, grey, and some more grey. it reminded her of kansas, which was supposed to be grey, grey, and some more grey if the wizard of oz was to be trusted.

as she carefully titled the contents into a mug, she thought it smelled something grotesque. sharp like fresh blood but with a hint of something citrusy. had she even added citruses? no matter, she was one who stuck to her initial plan no matter what would go wrong, and she would drink the smoothie even if it killed her. it wasn’t the way she expected for herself to go, but if it killed, it killed.

yet she changed inside her head, don’t kill me, don’t kill me, don’t kill me, as she stared at the whirling grey liquid. it was lumpier than she expected with flecks of white—the dandruff.

she swallowed in fear, and slowly grabbed the handle. don’t kill me, don’t kill me, don’t kill me.

while she was distracted with thinking, she forced her hand to shove the mug to her lips. and down it went, in one gulp.

she fainted.

and woke up with the entire periodic table memorized. and the formula to the pythagorean theorem drilled into her head even though she had forgot it yesterday. and the history of the trail of tears. and—

dear god! she jolted awake, her mind reeling. how had this knowledge crept inside her head after years of forgetting every little thing her teachers taught her?

had… had the smoothie done this to her?…

superpowers? from a binder smoothie? what was the earth getting to now?

July 5th Daily || Cat smoothie (However, it's not just a cat smoothie because I'd legitimately feel bad if I just wrote about blending a cat and calling it a day) || 557 words
~~~~~
Hello there fellow human and green beans alike! Mango here, and welcome back to Mango’s Smoothie Spectacular!
If you remember, last episode, we made a Mango smoothie, but with a twist, by adding a picture of my persona, Mango.
But, today I’m going to make a smoothie much, much worse. This is a smoothie only for the faint of heart, something that should most DEFINITELY not be done at home. I’ll be right back as I grab the ingredients.
*crouches down and grabs my cat*
This is my cat, Panther. Say hi, Panther!
*makes Panther wave hello* *Panther meows* *places her on the counter*
Isn’t she adorable? Of course she is! But… sometimes she can cause… chaos.
*Panther pushes a glass off of the counter*
See? Cats can be trouble. So…
*goes to the other counter, returning with a blender*
I’m making a cat smoothie.
Now, you may think this is gross, which it can definitely be. It’s also sometimes a little hard to drink when you know what it’s made of, but cat smoothies are truly very nutritious! Especially when made out of a well-exercised cat like Panther. My favourite is when you add some nice creamy milk with it. It’s… fairly tasty like this.
For what you get out of this, well, you get really good hunting skills. Very good hunting skills! You’ll learn exactly how to hunt like a cat the moment you drink it. And, don’t forget, it’s nutritious!

*grabs the cat, putting its face near the blender, then pulls the cat away*
You actually thought I was going to make a cat smoothie? Ha! Of course not! I love these cats way too much to do this! I actually lied about all of that, because I’ve never actually had a cat smoothie.
*pets cat and puts it down* *walks away to grab something else*
No, I’m here to actually make a couch smoothie. It’s in no way nutritious. But it has interesting flavours. I mean, it’s nice and fluffy, and a nice hint of leather. It’s quite delicious. It’s a perfect beverage to go with a nice lazy day of playing video games inside while it’s raining. The perfect couch potato drink!
*drops the piece of couch I grabbed and puts it in the blender and turns the blender on* *attempts to speak over the blender*
You see, this drink is in no way capable of giving you a healthy lifestyle. It will honestly make you feel pretty lazy. But, that’s when it’s good! We all need a break, and if you can’t manage to relax, this is definitely a great beverage to make!
*stops the blender and grabs a not broken glass* *shows the strange light brown muck inside the blender* *pours some of it into the glass*
Now it’s time to taste test and see if the flavours are right.
*takes a sip*
Give it a moment… yep, I definitely feel lazy and unmotivated now. I’m gonna go sit on the couch, edit this video at… some point. But, in all honesty, I don’t feel like doing it at all…
Umm… this should hopefully be released soon. Next episode, who knows when. Now, time for me to take a break…
*Mango sat down, never releasing this episode of Mango’s Smoothie Spectacular, and never made another one out of sheer laziness*

ballet barre smoothie

218 words because :sparkles: unmotivated :sparkles:

Your eyes glaze the menu, curious to see what you would get - the first item was Ballet Barre Smoothie. A little odd, you had to admit, but it wasn’t out of the realm of implausible.
That was, of course, until you saw the smoothie in question. It had a quite literal barre sticking out from it and, respectfully, it looked like vomit. It was bumpy and on one of the pieces of wood floating up, it had a straw. Wasn’t that great? You were drinking out of a barre.
Even though it was clearly a questionable item, you decided to order it and watched the (no older than) fifteen year old barista making it. A smile was plastered on their face, which was odd - but once again, you were ordering the oddest item on the menu.
When it arrived to you, you took a sip. You had gone in with no expectations, but a jolt of energy flashed through you before your previously sore and tired muscles were perfectly fine. You did a leg hold and a biellmann position perfectly - two things you had never been able to do before. With a scoff you take another sip, and then another. Each time you gained more and more flexibility.
Wow, maybe I should try Ballet Barre Smoothie more often.

Weekly 1

Part 1

The girl stood there, watching the night sky. Her name was Katie, the stargazer girl who lived on Pine Lane. It had always been her thing. The night sky had always been so pretty. Her short hair was barely being blown by the breeze that gently swept by.
Her red dress was one of the most comfortable ones she had. She had neatly tied the cyan bow on the back of her dress only an hour or so before. She tied it and untied what felt like twenty times. Maybe she was just trying to pass the time before sunset.
Katie paused for a moment in admiring the stars, feeling something brush around her legs. She felt the fur of her friend. Buddy. Her best animal friend. His yellow eyes stared up at her, before they shot over to the night sky.
She could see the stars reflecting in his eyes. It was almost like two mini galaxies. Katie looked up to where Buddy was watching. She gasped in delight, the constellations she was oh so familiar to her, had come alive.
Ballena, the whale slowly spun and swished her tail as she seemed to swim within the night sky. She was only an outline. Stars twinkled and blinked through the lines. Some were brighter than the others while others seemed to shine colors Katie had never seen in stars.
Her hand reached down to pat Buddy’s head. She pointed to the giant whale, “Look Buddy! It’s Ballena! She’s swimming!” Katie giggled excitedly. Practically bouncing on the stack of books she had placed to get a better view.
Books were everywhere. Piles and strewn books were everywhere from previous night’s stargazing. Katie glanced down at Buddy and pushed back one of her bangs. He had a grayish-brown coat with a tan-gray undercoat.
His tail stretched far back, seeming to reach back to her house which was in the distance; it split into strands that almost acted like ribbons. One time she had braided them. She giggled at the memory of it. Katie never understood how Buddy ever managed to walk with that big tail of his.
(356 words)

Part 2

Amelia waited silently on the deck; she was sitting crossed legged on the couch arm. She had donned her normal light blue hoodie and dark blue pants. It was kind of cold at night and she didn’t feel like freezing her toes off waiting.
She had placed the gift which she had made on the small table between the two couches. Well, she had made half of it, the salsa at least. It was a simple recipe, she had made it nearly a hundred times, it wasn’t anything special.
But it was a gift, albeit a simple one, but gifting was so much better than receiving anything. And everybody liked food, didn’t they?
A quick movement pushed her current train of thought to the back of her mind. There was only one person who it could be. Liam. Maybe he could be considered her best friend. They related to each other in many ways.
Amelia heard footsteps approaching and there Liam was. In a short sleeved green shirt and some dark blue jeans. It was fifty degrees outside. How did he manage to do that? Amelia never knew nor questioned it.
She waved at him as he plopped onto the opposite couch. He was obviously worn out but glad to be able to rest now. He waved back lazily, only lifting a hand in acknowledgement. A smile was hiding behind his tired face, she could tell.
The pair of teens began to talk in hushed tones, careful to not wake the sleeping neighbors.
“So, Ami, why did you want me to come over again?”
“Well, we both have a free night tonight so I thought we could hang out for a few hours?”
“Sounds good to me!” Liam said a tad too loudly. Both froze for a moment; they didn’t feel like getting “caught” which wouldn’t technically be a bad thing. Neither felt like explaining what they were doing though.
Amelia couldn’t help but roll her eyes after an eternity (not really) of silence. She then whispered back to Liam, “Well, I made some snacks for us to munch on.”
“Really? What kind of snacks?”
“Chips and salsa! Kinda like the ones from Mexican restaurants, but better!”
“Did you make both?” He asked as he opened the salsa and bag of chips as quietly as possible.
“Nah, wish I could’ve made the chips though. Didn’t have the time.”
Liam dipped the chip into the salsa before just shoving the chip into his mouth. His face lit up, “This is so good! You’re right, it is most definitely better than any restaurant!” He grabbed for another chip, “How’d you make this? I really want to make some at some point in my life.”
“It’s simple, but can I tell you on Monday? Or tomorrow?”
“Fine. But you have to tell me how you made this amazing food.” Liam said, half-jokingly.
“Deal.”
“Yes!”
(481 words)

Part 3

I peeked through the branches as voices echoed throughout the forest. Four people stood there, in a thin clearing. They were in awe of the iron tree, with its glowing top. I didn’t speak, I only watched them without a word. I didn’t know if they saw me, did it really matter?
I recognized them though. They were royalty of this kingdom. They were out hunting most likely. Slowly they approached the iron tree, huddled together defensively. Soon the approached faster and faster and then they were… gone?
I blinked and then rubbed my eyes. That’s not how things work. I stumbled over to where they were. Where they should be. Gone. Nothing. Nobody was there other than me. No trace was left of them. Nobody would believe me.
I sank to my knees before pounding on the earth as if it had just gobbled them up. The only thing that happened was my hand hurting terribly. I wanted to weep. Cry for the lost. Cry for losing the kings and queens.
Nothing came from my eyes, not a single drop. Burning frustration rose to my cheeks, turning them pink. I rose from the ground, dusting off my pants. I glared at the iron tree. It only blinked its light at me, taunting me almost. But it wasn’t sentient. It didn’t have any emotions.
I turned around, pushing the foliage away from my face, snapping twigs and crunching leaves with every step. The forest was thick here. I didn’t know why I ventured here. Maybe I was destined too. Maybe not.
The forest seemed to go on forever, barely thinning out to make it easier to traverse. No signs of anything other than the wild could be seen. Birds chirped and plants grew high, but sunlight wormed its way between the leaves and scattering itself on the ground.
As the forest thinned, I broke out into a run. I wanted to get away from the iron tree and the endless woods. I stumbled on something, flailing my arms to keep my balance as I skidded to a halt. Something shiny caught my eye as I doubled over to catch my breath.
I reached down for the shiny object. Maybe I was being careless, sure. A jewel. From where? I could only guess. One of the kings or queens, which one I couldn’t know for sure. I rolled it around in my palm. I could take this and sell it for a fortune. Act as if what I discovered never happened. Or I could go back and search for them.
I weighed the options in my mind. I stumbled back through the woods, searching for the heart of it, where the iron tree was. But as hard and as far as I searched. I couldn’t find anything. I wound up back out of the woods.
Maybe I should share my discovery with the knights. They’d know what to do. Not me. The third option was a lot better than the two I came up with. Even if I was out of breath, adrenaline coursed through my veins, giving me the strength to run back to the kingdom and find the knights.
(530 words)

Part 4

Katie crawled up onto the book stack before balancing easily atop it. She looked up at the stars, watching them intently. She mentally traced the lines between stars turning them into constellations. She had memorized them at this point.
They were so far away, even on the tower of books, but one day? One day, she’d touch them and dance with them in the sky. Even if she wasn’t in double digits for age yet, she desperately wanted to be an astronaut and an astronomer.
She would study the stars even closer than she was here. Her mom had explained before that it would be hard work to become both of those. But she could do it! She paused in thinking about her future and planning for it as something brushed against her leg.
It was furry. She knew exactly what it was, er, who it was without even looking. Buddy stood on two stacks of books, watching her intently. His dark gray coat seemed to glisten in the moonlight. His yellow eyes reflected the stars above him.
His tail was like streamers tied together at the base. She could braid them or turn them into a bow. She had done it once. Buddy gave a sharp bark in the direction of the sky. Katie tilted her head at him before looking up to the sky.
Ballena the whale was going for her nightly swim. She slowly twirled and spun in the midnight sky, dancing. Katie wanted to join her. But being an adult and graduating from school was so far away. But the stars would wait for her. They came back every night. Buddy came every night to say hello and watch the stars with her.
And some constellation came to dance or tell a story in the stars every night. They were patient. They would wait for her to come to them. She had promised that. She had promised she’d take Buddy to dance in the stars with her one day.
The sky seemed to burst with colors, purples, peaches, pinks. Almost like fireworks. The stars did too, browns and greens. Blinking at her, watching her. She giggled a little pointing towards Ballena as she patted Buddy’s head.
Her head sharply turned towards her house in the distance. She thought she heard her mom calling to her. She looked down to say goodbye to Buddy, but he was already gone. She hopped down from the book stack and started to return home. The stars would always wait for her.
(421 words)

Total words, 1,788 words!

july 5 daily - 244 words
this turned into an ad xD
object: watch

What's the time? is something everyone has asked at least once in their lifetime. Isn't it annoying to never know the time? Shouldn't humans just have an extra sense, telling them the time? Additionally, watches are quite annoying too and can distract you while working, especially if they're digital. If you agree with all of the above, you're in luck. Introducing the watch smoothie! With one quick gulp, you'll be able to tell the time wherever you are, whenever the day, and whatever the situation.

The watch smoothie is simple to make, quick to drink, and gives phenomenon powers, as mentioned above. Although it may not sound appetizing, trust me, it's been safety tested around 100 times on many different people. None have died yet.
Blended with water, the taste of the smoothie may not be the best but you can always alter it with artificial flavouring. It has a pleasant smoothie texture that many people love and little chunks of watch that enhance the experience of drinking it.

But this doesn't mean that you can just grab a watch and blend it! Our team, here at weird.smoothies.co, has created a completely safe diy watch smoothie kit. It comes with a watch, a blender, artificial flavouring, and everything else you need to make your life better. Costs $35.99.

This smoothie is very beneficial and useful. So, will you be one of the first people in the world brave enough to try the watch smoothie?

Object: iPod (204 words) If I put my iPod into a smoothie, the result would be a pink mishmash of music, pictures, journeys, and fun. It would be mixed into a raspberry and strawberry smoothie, topped with whipped cream. It is very cold, refreshing, and vibrant with colors and flavors.Drinking it gives you temporary synesthesia. The pure taste causes you to hear a song that reflects your current mood: happy, depressed, excited, annoyed, angry, lonely, k-pop. Images and videos of your friends having fun appear in the air, along with bright bursts of pink and yellow shapes. You then have this ability for the next 15 minutes. For example, taking a step flashes your workout history, current steps taken, and plays a fun upbeat song.Looking at a clock causes the numbers to dance before your eyes, showing the current time in different parts of the globe. Every time you get a new text message, you smell the subject of it: school, vacations, etc. Listening to a podcast causes you to visualize what it would be like to be immersed in the story. And playing games means you hear lots of laughter and giggling. Then it slowly disappears, until you take a sip once more


Poem (141 words)

Fireworks

Pop, sizzle fizz, pop pop pop
the sky is a rainbow filled with color
each spiral spreading out and reaching for the stars
fizz pop, fizz pop pop

although i do enjoy fireworks
sizzle sizzle pop, pop, sizzle
think about the planet
the birds trying to fly
animals irritated by the loud noises
pop pop pop sizzle fizz fizz pop

what if we found a new (old) way to celebrate
maybe each town holds a picnic or potluck or festival day
fizz sizzle pop, pop, fizz pop
with parades and games and performances and fun
maybe there could be a nationwide american history contest
to honor our nation
pop sizzle sizzle pop, pop, pop, pop

fireworks
fizz fizz sizzle pop
fire works?
sizzle fizz pop pop pop pop fizz pop sizzle pop pop pop pop pop pop pop pop
POP!

Daily 5: chair smoothie (242 words)

The first thing I saw when I looked to the left was a chair. A chair smoothie. Yum!

By ingesting this smoothie, your throat will be racked with splinters. But these splinters will give you the power to sit down comfortably, without a chair! You’ll look ridiculous, but who cares? Are you waiting in line for a ride at Disneyland, but have been standing up for hours? Just pull out your Chair Smoothie and sit down in the air! Amaze your friends by floating on a nonexistent chair, and go see a doctor to remove your splinters! Would you like to make this Chair Smoothie? Here’s the recipe:

1 broken chair made of dark wood
1 blender that can handle crushing a chair (we recommend our product, the Chair Blender)
6 gallons of milk (to liquify it)
12 bananas (for flavor)
6 dates (for sweetness)
1 tablespoon of chia/hemp seeds (for healthy-ness)
1 cup ice (to keep smoothie cold)
Any add-ins- frozen fruit, cocoa powder, peanut butter, or anything else!

Instructions:
-Chop the chair up into blendable pieces. You can do this by burning it to ash (aRsOn), using a jackhammer, or using a chainsaw! (Note- with the Chair Blender, you can toss the chair right in, no chopping required!)
-Add all other ingredients
-Blend on high for 2 hours
-Drink and enjoy the power of sitting on thin air!
-Go see a doctor for the splinters immediately
-And you’re done!

daily 5: i am not funny.
328 words, i talk nonsense a lot. i've never actually delt with cops lol



you know, it is a shame i don't have one of those smoothie machines. the ones with all those whirling blades that mix fruits up. or other things, if you'd like. i'd love. would create the most disgusting concoctions. very exciting. would you like to enjoy a pizza smoothie? of course you would. this is the part where you puke. by the way.

now. mixing a dog in. for the record, i may commit crimes, (such as: enjoying morally grey fictional characters) but i am not inhumane. i would never destroy a dog with the atrocious weapon of war that a smoothie mixer is. that'd make my younger brothers cry and possibly call the cops on me. no, i'm just destroying an effigy of a dog, a stuffed animal if you like. making my younger brothers cry without the. er. the cops part. rather not deal with them again.

now, for the sacrifice. i chose this fine specimen of stuffed animal. look at them! what an adorable little guy. can't wait for it to die. are you prepared to watch it succumb to the mini ceiling fan? but with a few sharper edges? prepared to watch stuffing fly, the pelt get ripped to shreds? prepared for the grinding cries of the mixer as it tries to cut through this creature that is, unfortunately, not as easily cuttable as an apple? fortunately-or unfortunately for you, you don't have to be! i do not have a smoothie mixer.

however, i imagine that this smoothie would taste like stuffing. and perhaps bacon. i'm not sure where i got bacon from. i may be hungry right now. hm. moving on, it may look like. uh. stuffing. surprisingly enough.
besides all that, it would do absolutely nothing. deeply useless, just the way i like things. no, wait, come back, it's uhhh. it does things. um. it may give you the magical power to never come near me again? yeah good for you actually.

Daily 5 07/05/23
Object: my bible :’)
675 words
*Hail looks to the left*
Oh wait there’s a pile of books next to me, I didn’t mean to actually do the daily now. But it was the first thing I saw so—
*A few hours later, Hail decides to write*
Ahh yes, the first thing I saw was my paperback copy of The New American Bible Revised Edition that I got because they had extras at church so why not? No going back now, I already looked to the left.
*Hail goes on Scratch to find motivation and plays a BANNERS song*
I feel like the living epitome of the “Um, whatcha got there? A smoothie.” meme.
A blender sits on the kitchen counter, plugged in and ready to use.
Honestly, blenders just remind me of my mom’s terrible, colorful concoctions she used to make.
The cheery kitchen is quiet, until out of nowhere, a book comes flying towards the blender and crashes inside, pages wrinkling in the small space. A girl strolls towards the blender, puts on the lid, then starts it up. The blender emits a whirring noise not unlike the sound of a paper shredder, and the book inside gets, for lack of a better phrase, torn apart.
“Hmm, maybe it needs some water or something,” the girl mutters.
MAYBE INDEED story me! I don’t think drinking straight up paper is going to be very appetizing. Then again, paper and water? You have to drink it, not me!
The girl stops the blender, takes off the lid, and pours water into its papery contents. She swirls the mixture around a little before starting it back up.
The blender, now with actual liquid in it, whips up a soggy, mushy looking creation that the girl pours, well more like dislodges into a glass.
“Here goes nothing,” she tips the glass back and drinks some of the smoothie.
The first thing she notices is how entirely unappetizing the smoothie was. Paper, evidently, is not delicious, no matter what she thought in her younger years. It felt sludgy and pasty, and she did not want to go for a second sip.
*Hail realizes she’s been writing in present tense this whole time*
Blearrghh I feel like I just drank that smoothie. Anyway.
But after the initial shock of the smoothie’s flavor fades away, she realizes something else is happening. Words start filling her mind: whispering phrases, numbers, names. A veritable influx of information rapidly rushes through her memory and clicks into place, settling into familiar spots as her conscious mind finally connects with her subconscious. She grasps for some way of explaining the feeling of the sheer amount of knowledge she just gained.
I literally cannot write in present tense now that I’ve realized I’m doing it. I suppose that’s one way to describe it. You can’t undo the knowledge.
It feels like… like when she would think about one of her characters and discovered something perfect about them that also fit into the plot and everything just came together amazingly, too amazingly for her to not turn to her subconscious and say “I see what you did there”.
In this case, she sees what the smoothie did there. Clearly, this was a Martha Speaks moment where drinking her bible made her suddenly learn all its contents.
“Wow,” the girl stammers, “I can remember everything.”
She grins. Complete biblical knowledge wasn’t too bad, even if she did also remember the table of contents and the preface. She runs to her room. “I have so many questions!”
Now I imagine if I did suddenly memorize my bible because of a smoothie, my first question would be “why did I just memorize my bible via smoothie?” Or maybe, “why did I just blend it into a smoothie?” But then I would be my nerdy historian self and rush off to do a ton of research because memorizing does not equal understanding, but it does make it easier.
*Hail looks at what she just wrote.*
Definitely regretting all life decisions — actually, no, this was good motivation because I would never drink this smoothie.

i nearly did one about a guitar bc i still don't know my lefts from my rights

Have you ever wanted to try a cushion smoothie?
Well, here you can do just that!
They come in two flavours - blue and cream, which both taste exactly the same, but at least they look cool (think of it as the smoothie equivalent of pink and white marshmallows)! They’re light, fluffy, and creamy, and taste great both cold and warmed up. They’re a blend of the wonderful flavours of comfort, home, nostalgia, and relaxation - which everyone needs a little more of in their lives. Their thickness makes them almost more like a milkshake than a smoothie - but all that protein from the mysterious filling inside cushions that no-one’s really ever seen makes them just as healthy as smoothies, and even more filling. As a bonus, they even have an extra layer of fluff on top - which tastes like a mix of whipped cream, marshmallows and synthetic fur.
But the best part about cushion smoothies is that they give you the strangest feeling of lightness, almost floating, all the weight lifting off your body and mind - almost like a power, really.
(may contain traces of feathers from our best-selling pillow smoothie - keep away from small children as these feathers have caused choking)

NEXT POST (LINK TO SKIP)
reserving because this is going to be a long one oh dear (around 2k, fgjhajkg) and i need to have a link in case someone wants to skip ^^''

words: 2825
daily: 7/5
Say you wanted to turn a computer into a smoothie. The first issue would be getting the computer to fit in the blender. Obviously, the solution to this is a knife, to chop it up into parts. You’ve seen mentions of this task in Randall Munroe’s book How To, but up until now you’ve never had any practical experience for the subject- however, there’s a first time for everything. (You wince as the wires spit sparks and the screen of the 600-dollar device goes dark, and begin to regret your choice, but you persevere regardless.)
When you’re done, there are a surprising amount of… Well, you’re not entirely sure what they are, but there’s a lot of little bits and pieces you’re not sure are blender-safe. Ah, whatever, you decide, and toss everything into the blender. You plug it in, grab some earplugs to muffle what you’re sure will be a cacophonous and potentially ear-destroying noise, and begin to blend everything together.
Oh, wait, you realize, halfway through the process- you need liquid if this is to be a smoothie. You pull open the fridge, grab a bag of ice, and dump in an amount you’re not too sure the exact specifics of. The mixture in the blender begins to make some… questionable noises. (You wince again, and sincerely hope this is going to be worth it.)
The end mixture looks more like water with chunks of metal in it, and pouring the mixture into a cup reveals that the glass on the side of your blender now has some light scratches on the side. You’re not too worried, but if you’ve learned anything from Pyrex glassware explosions, the condition of your kitchen equipment shouldn’t be taken lightly; you make a note to get another blender later, and vow not to abuse your next one like this. What you’re really worried about, though, is the smoothie- which looks like heavy metal poisoning in a convenient glass.
Your stomach twists and your heart rate speeds up just looking at the thing you have brought into this world, and you shudder to think what might actually happen if you drink it. But at the same moment, you realize two things in utter clarity: first, this would be an absolute disaster to dispose of, and there’s nowhere for it to go that you can think of. Second, you brought this thing into being, and you must take responsibility for your actions.
You swallow, type the local poison helpline into your phone so that you only need to press a button to make the call, and bring the cup to your lips- hang on, you mutter, because there’s another hotline that you think might suit this purpose better. No, you decide; this is definitely poison. Trying to stall for just the smallest amount of time during which to strengthen your resolve, you pluck out your earplugs and take several deep breaths.
You bring the cup to your lips, and take the smallest sip you can, using the edge of your teeth to filter out any chunks in your mouthful. You certainly value your life, of course, and the least you could do is minimize the effects of this… Besides, you’re at least partially curious what this smoothie would taste like, though you’re not sure what cost. Ah, well, you think to yourself as you swirl the liquid around in your mouth, nothing you can do about it now.
It tastes unexpectedly salty. You’d done some research on this before, and had expected something more metallic, and- you pause, and realize that, given what show you’d last been using the computer to watch, it’s only to be expected that you’re tasting tears in this concoction. Though, you think, after a moment has passed, that might just be your own tears at what you’ve done.
You spit your mouthful back into the cup, and hope that the care you took to prevent yourself from accidentally drinking any was enough. For good measure, you take several sips of (non-contaminated) water and use that to wash your mouth. You still press the call button on your phone, though, and ask the bewildered person on the other end how best to dispose of your “smoothie”. While you wait for them to get back to you, your imagination begins to run wild with what might happen- the whole thing could get you under investigation, sued, and in a severe amount of legal trouble (as well as debt). You might end up poisoned regardless of the amount of precautions you’ve taken, even hospitalized-
“Ah, yeah, this has happened several times since that- oh, what was it, that Esswissee thing,” another person says on the other end; they must be the closest thing to a resident SWC expert the hotline has. “The other people who did that have actually started a lawsuit by now, though since you say you didn’t actually swallow any you’re not going to be in any serious trouble for now- just monitor your symptoms for the next week or so, and if anything feels off, don’t hesitate to get medical attention.”
“Okay,” you nod, even if they can’t see what you’re doing. “But how am I supposed to dispose of it?”
“Don’t worry about it,” they reply. “Just leave it to us; We’re experts at this sort of thing.”
“What do you mean?” you ask.
“Like I said, don’t worry about it,” they say, and something about the way they speak and the confidence with which they do so makes you believe them.
You hang up, and turn to tidying up the kitchen. You leave the cup of computer smoothie on the tiled countertop corner, but even as you try to busy yourself with your new task you feel its presence in the back of your mind- like a light prickling, the hot breath of the elephant in the room you’re desperately trying to sidestep for the time being.
Nearly an hour after the whole ordeal, you’re sitting on the counter and contemplating the pseudo-smoothie in your kitchen when a knock on your door rouses you from your partial trance.
You make your way to your front door, all the while wondering who would be knocking on your door. Perhaps one of your more nosy neighbors, though they’ve mostly left you alone since the March Arson Incident… But when you glance through the peephole, the person waiting for you is unfamiliar. They’re dressed in a well-pressed suit and are wearing sunglasses, which would be a very convincing secret agent Halloween costume- the problem, however, is that today is decidedly not Halloween.
“Yes?” you call out.
They step forward- and then, straight through the door, as though they had briefly become intangible. You find yourself reeling back, grasping for the words to address them and yet coming up empty due to the shock of their power.
“I’m going to have to ask you to finish that smoothie,” they say, voice calm and flat and most certainly altered with some sort of voice-concealing technology- but, even with their altered voice, you can tell they are the same person that had been on the phone earlier.
You squint at them suspiciously. “I’m going to have to ask you why,” you reply, trying to mimic their way of speaking- but some of your internal panic may have leaked through, because they turn their gaze on you in what must certainly be pity.
“I understand this is confusing, but you’re going to have to listen to my instructions-” they begin, but you cut them off.
“Yeah, I’m confused, no kidding,” you roll your eyes. “I mean, first you answer my hotline call with cryptic instructions and vague reassurances, then you come to my house, and you phase through the door and ask me to drink something that is definitely going to poison me, and you don’t even give me a proper answer-”
“Mx.-” they try to interrupt, seeming to be growing agitated.
“Who even are you?” By now, your volume has raised to the point where you’re shouting, but you can’t find it in yourself to care. “What gives you the right to come here, and why in the world should I be listening to you?! I’m perfectly fine with my current state of affairs, thank you very much, so just tell me how to throw that drink away, and leave!”
For emphasis, you jab your finger in the direction of outside. They seem taken aback at that, as though unsure of how to respond, and so the two of you stay silent for several moments, you breathing heavily and them staring blankly at you.
Then, they laugh wryly. “I’ve been doing this job for centuries- no, millenia, and never have I met someone so strange as you. I haven’t needed to convince someone to drink the rest of their smoothies since I started this job and established the phone line-”
“I’m not here to hear an anecdote,” you say flatly, having now reigned in your temper. “Get to the point, or leave.”
“Alright,” they sigh. “By taking a sip of that smoothie, even if you didn’t digest it you have still permanently changed your constitution. If you don’t finish it, you won’t be able to reap the rewards of the risk you have taken- and, believe me, they’re very much worth it.”
“I’m afraid that if I do finish it, I’ll find myself being the one reaped,” you remark dryly, folding your arms over your chest and staring them down calmly. “Are you quite sure this won’t be the case?”
They’re silent for a long moment. Then:
“No,” they admit.
“Well, I’d rather take my chances, then-”
“You didn’t even let me finish!” They protest. “Regardless of your condition when you finish the drink, as long as you completely finish it, the Association has a healer that will restore your energies.”
“And why should I trust you?”
They look at you for a moment with their head tilted to the side, almost as though they’re confused. If you were feeling descriptive, you’d say they’d been slapped with a metaphorical fish.
“This is a large amount of effort to put into a mere plot to murder someone, wouldn’t you think,” they drawl.
“Perhaps you want to see my cabin’s downfall,” you scoff.
“I can assure you, this has nothing to do with Esswissee,” they say placatingly. “We’re just connected by sheer luck, with the smoothie challenge. While we normally have more controlled member inductions, we’d take anyone we can get, regardless of what power the process gives them.”
“Power?” you ask, deciding to skip over how much like a cult their organization seems to be.
“Ah, yes!” they seem to brighten considerably, and you get the feeling they know they’ve piqued your interest now. “A power like the ability to control someone’s tangibility, or to heal instantly, and sometimes even multiple powers. There have been recorded cases of nearly every power, including powers as common as hydro- or pyro- kinesis to the incredibly rare chronokinesis, though every time the power comes with an enhanced lifespan…”
They continue to speak, but their words are turning into rambling by now. Their part about the powers certainly seems to be accurate, but…
“How can I be sure that the smoothie will be what gives me the power?” you ask.
“You can’t, but you can trust me,” they say, and again their voice carries the sort of certainty that makes you want to believe them- Hang on.
Sure, they’ve displayed a power already, but when you consider that they mentioned that it was possible to even have multiple powers…
“How can I be sure you aren’t just making me trust you?” you spit out, disgusted now that you’ve realized the truth of what’s going on.
“What?” they ask, and for a moment they seem genuinely bewildered, but you remember that they’re a being millenia old. If there were any way to learn how to perfect an act, they would of course know it.
“Your other power from your- your whatever,” you continue, with growing surety. “This entire time I’ve been talking to you, you’ve been manipulating me.”
“I mean, I can’t help it,” they shrug. “It’s kind of automatic. Besides, you’re the one who called me. Why are you concerned? You knew the Association had people like me, so there’s hardly any reason for worry, is there?”
“I- what?” This time, you’re completely caught off guard.
“You called the Association’s phone, and said that you needed to know how to dispose of a computer smoothie,” they say, and something about their tone just feels like they’re mocking you. “If you hadn’t mentioned Esswissee, I wouldn’t have gotten involved- but you did, and so as the most senior Association member currently available I was called to help.
“Wait- did you not mean to call us?” they ask, and even behind the sunglasses you can tell that the expression they’re currently looking at you with is one of the utmost horror. Somewhere in you that you’re not quite sure you trust, you feel like they’re being genuine. “I- oh, oh my galaxies around.”
They begin to shake their head slowly, and you’re quite sure why but you feel your heart sinking, as though you’ve just lost a major opportunity. “I- I’m so sorry for everything that happened today. I’ll get out of your hair as soon as possible.”
You follow their gaze inwards, toward the kitchen, and your heart leaps into your throat. Before you fully realize it, you’re standing by the glass of smoothie, some hidden urge to keep it for yourself triggering and compelling you to move. You bring the glass into your hands, just as they reach for it at the same moment.
You spend a moment contemplating the smoothie, steadying yourself and preparing for what you’re about to do. In that moment, it seems to be more than just a drink- it’s an opportunity for things to change, distilled into a glass. Then, in one smooth, fluid movement, you tip the glass to your mouth and swallow the entire thing.
It doesn’t go down as smoothly as you’d hoped; it’s both incredibly salty and very gritty, and if you weren’t so determined to drink it you likely would have thrown it up before you’d even finished the first mouthful. But, at the end, the taste is actually somewhat bearable. You certainly won’t be making another computer smoothie any time soon, but it certainly wasn’t completely horrible.
But your attention at the moment isn’t actually on the drink you just consumed- or even the empty cup in your hand. No, the most prominent thing drawing your attention is the whirlwind of words echoing in your mind, threatening to overwhelm you. In the jumble of words and- you realize- feelings, you can barely make anything out in the chaotic mess.
The person in front of you is saying something- eggs butter oil frying pan- but you can’t- anger anguish hurt panic- hear anything. It’s- unexpected unheard of unusual process- too loud.
You grab the earplugs- confusion oddity memories -and hastily jam them into your ears, forcing your eyes closed and trying to stop the sudden onslaught of sheer noise, but the images aren’t stopping. Deep breaths, you remind yourself, but your breaths are coming shakily and you can’t focus.
Your vision is being overrun with waves of colors and images of unfamiliar places and people, all overlapping and made all the more confusing by the dull hum of noise in the background. You squint your eyes and can just barely make out the kitchen. They’re still standing where they last were, one hand outstretched as though they’re not sure what to do. The glass is on the floor. At some point, you dropped it.
You’re elsewhere, in a freezing metal facility, in front of a young girl with brown hair tied back in twin pigtails, her green eyes wide and seeing something elsewhere. In one hand, she holds a green plastic cup. She drops it, presses her hands to her ears and forces her eyes shut, doubling over as her mouth contorts in a silent scream.
This isn’t your memory, but you’re seeing it regardless. A voice, clear and calm, speaks. It’s from your mouth, but you’re not speaking- still, it almost feels like you are.
“A… telepath?” they ask, detached and flat and not reacting at all to the scene before them.
That’s enough for you; you focus your attention on yourself, on your thoughts and your thoughts only. Slowly, the images dim down to something you can control, and you’re back in your mind.
“Mangoes above,” you gasp, as soon as you can speak. You look at them, this time trying to keep your mind contained and inside your thoughts only. “What- Holy goats.”
“It do be like that,” they comment wryly.
You can’t help but laugh at the understatement.

Have you ever wondered what your short best friend would taste like? Well, now you can find out! With the brand-new McRay Shake, a spin-off of the Grimace Shake, you can now try the legendary RL’s best friend in the form of a smoothie / milkshake! It has a metallic aftertaste of blood and also tastes faintly of clocks. People have reported to suddenly know the entire DC and FNaF lore after consuming it, as well as gain a profound interest in the Myers-Briggs Personality Type Indicator. The consumers also have been noted to become 51.5% more cool.
The McRay Shake contains a healthy dose of the RPM (Ray Powder Mixture) that contains an extract of Ray mincemeat, as well as it has milk and a bit of ice-cream, and strawberries - Ray’s favourite fruit. It has a 8.7/10 rating on the definitely existing McDonalds ratings website.
(Warning! The McRay side effects include a sudden loss of height, getting less rizz, 25% of the consumer’s brain cells dying, suddenly becoming an INFP, living in one’s own head more than in real life, loss of interest in human contact, short term memory loss to match the consumer’s new height, stealing doors, and more.)

(THIS IS A JOKE DON'T WORRY )


Have you ever wondered what your best friend would taste like? Yeah…i haven't. But if you have, come on down to KFC, because we are now proudly introducing our brand new RL Chicken salad shake! (We totally aren't rivalling McDonalds over that Grimace shake <3) With a galaxy purple appearance, you wouldn’t notice the difference between the Grimace shake and the RL chicken salad shake, so just buy ours instead!!!

Our RL chicken salad shake tastes strongly of a particular chicken named Darrell (he’s a Chonny Jash fan) and also of ink and squared math book paper! Testers of this shake have reported a sudden strong interest in Chonny’s Charming Chaos Compendium, even if they have never heard of it before. Reporters also claim that they also suddenly know how to code on python, and they also suddenly gain an alarming amount of rizz and intelligence.

(HOWEVER. ARE THE SIDE EFFECTS WORTH IT?!! SIDE EFFECTS INCLUDE: Sudden and rapid height growth, an overwhelming desire to torture anyone under 5’4, a dangerous interest in science, a sad habit of T - posing, an urge to recite everything that happened in Hamilton, a suddenly lack of emotion, and hyperactivity. Other symptoms are yet to be reported)
210 WORDS

Name: Ava
Cabin: Lyric
Word count- 205/200
Topic: Look to your left and make a smoothie
Content: July 5th Daily

LET'S GET IT

If this add reached you, you're one of the luckiest people in SWC. Because you get a free sample of- THE DOOR SMOOTHIE, known as Entrancing Entrance.

This drink sure in Entrancing to just look at. With the main colors as different shades of brown, it also has red to represent strawberries, yellow to represent mango and green to represent sour watermelon candy the extra sour version.

Once the straw is on your lips and the first sip enters your mouth, all heaven will be upon you. The Entrancing Entrance gives you three minutes of bliss before you devour the whole drink and crave for another glass.

This smoothie gives you the following strengths- The feeling of euphoria, and a break from anger issues.

Sometimes, at the bottom of the glass, you can find a remainder of an actual piece of a door. We do not repay you for this and it is just a slight inconvenience. For some, doors may be really tasty, and there is always a first try for everything!!



Note- side effects include hallucinations, diarrhoea, covid19, Extreme vomiting, Dry throat, and an excessive hate for doors. Please do not mind the above to much or we wil go out of business.

.

YOU KNOW YOU GOT THAT HOoOoOoOoooOME~
YOU KNOW I WANT THAT HOOoOooOOoOOOOoME~

ollie’s daily 07.05.23

DISCLAIMER: side effects may include scratchy throat, uncontrollable coughing, blockage of the airways, extreme constipation, tooth loss (all of them), internal bleeding, and death. (but that last one isn’t that bad, right?)

this smoothie is only—and I mean ONLY—for the utmost willing and brave individuals. which is why, we will determine through a unique process whether or not you, my friend, are worthy. first, we must thoroughly assess you and your abilities. if you have previously eaten a spoonful of cinnamon, or paper, that is the first step. after that, you must have a mouth that opens 10 feet tall and 5 feet wide to ingest the smoothie. due to the nature of the door we are talking about, it is required that ALL of the smoothie is ingested at ONCE, meaning your mouth must therefore be the size of the door (which isn’t that uncommon—y’all have big mouths).

now, and only now, may we continue onto the phase of positive effects of the door smoothie. after ingesting, your height will increase to the size of the door to take its place, and wood will be absorbed into your bones to help you grow. your hair will automatically turn brown, and your hands, feet, fingers and toes will be blocks and not curved like normal. and finally, you will have the internal need to act as a door, so your primary living space will be below/inside a door frame.
in the past, people who have had their family members drink the smoothie have appreciated the sentient nature of their door rather than an unwilling block of wood. although this does limit your life to standing and moving around a hinge, which, your toes and fingers are connected to. which is the cause of the block fingers and toes—we dont want you feeling the pain, so square digits will totally change that!

if you meet the requirements, we would love for you to attempt to try out door smoothie. while it doesn’t work out for every individual, it certainly has in the past!

note: smoothie is irreversible and you may not return to a normal life after ingesting

Math Book–Daily
I took a turn to the left and saw my Math Book so I guess for today my Math book is my topic to write so here we go. I love Math so so much and of course Math is my Favorite Subject and growing up I always topped Math. Just today I for the results of my Math Exam and I got Second Highest( Not enclosing the marks). Math often helps me to overcome some dilemmas. Also, Currently in my Math Book I was solving some questions from Squares and Square roots( I'm in Eighth Grade currently). And in Math My Favorite Branch is Algebra and in physics I learned about Trigonometric Ratios a little bit for calculations in the Net force so I'm really looking forward to learning Vector Algebra and more of Trigonometric Ratios as it is am interesting topic. If you are wondering about my maintenance of my my Math book it is in excellent condition like I have kept it clean without any scribbles for now( I am the most messiest person living on planet Earth). Currently in my Math class, My Math Teacher is teaching us Square roots and next to next week my Periodic Test will start and I am so so Excited..!!

Smoothie( Bonus)–Daily
I don't know about you but I really like Smoothie as my breakfast or snack. There are various types of Smoothies but my Favorite are many like Banana Smoothie, Mango Smoothie and Chocolate Smoothie and many more. I'm just naming the main ingredients that I add but usually with them I also add walnuts, berries and some dry fruits. I feel that Smoothie is an fruitful Drink.

July 5th Daily

I was starving. After a whole day of writing in my room, I came to the realization that I hadn't eaten anything! I looked to my left and saw a mirror. Hmm. Good enough, I suppose. I lugged the full-body mirror down the stairs and into the kitchen. I couldn't grill it, couldn't fry it, and I definitely couldn't boil it. I mean, how outrageous were those ideas? I finally decided that I was in the mood for a smoothie. I got my stepstool and brought out the blender. Then I was met with another dilemma. Clearly, the 4-foot tall mirror wouldn't fit into the 1-foot blender. So, I had to do a little dissection. I found the biggest knife we had (we typically used it for cutting watermelons, but it would have to do) and began to dice up the mirror. Granted, it took a while, but the time only increased my hunger and desire to hurry up and finish this mirror smoothie. Finally, the mirror was in small enough pieces that I could place them all (along with the shattered pieces of glass scattered across the floor) into the blender. I looked in the fridge. No apple juice, no orange juice, pineapple juice? No thank you. Aha! Milk! I took out the carton of milk and poured generously into the blender. Then I halved the remainder of our strawberries, threw in a handful of blueberries, and last but not least, took a few leaves from our mint plant and shredded them into the smoothie. Then I put the lid on the blender and began to blend. The sound it made was horrific, but the smoothie looked delicious. Finally, it was done. I poured some into a cup and tasted it. Then of course, I immediately began choking on blended glass. Fortunately, I knew the self-Heimlich. I was saved! Unfortunately, while I was choking, I had thrown out a hand and knocked over my amazing smoothie. I had to wipe it up and throw the remains away. Oh well, maybe that's for the best. After all, most people don't know the self-Heimlich. They wouldn't be able to save themselves from what I was dubbing The WOW! Smoothie. However, if you'd like to know the recipe…my apologies, I “can't currently divulge that information.”

Smoothie Daily
210 words

Here are a few things you should know before attempting to make your window smoothie. Please remember to ask you guardian be for tearing out a window and blending it up. Thank you.
1: You will need a fairly large blender, or smoothie cup, if you are to fit the window inside of it.
2: Only sharp blender blades will break up the window better the dull ones.
3: If your smoothie looks to dry, try adding milk, yogurt, or glass cleaner. (We suggest glass cleaner, not only will it make you smoothie less dry, but it will also disinfect your smoothie.)
4: To add extra flavour to your smoothie, try strawberries, bananas, blueberries, chocolate, or orange gunk remover.
5: Never give a window smoothie to anyone who is 5 or lower, 50 or older, or pregnant.
6: Please remember to write a note to your loved ones before drinking the window smoothie.

PLEASE NOTE
Drinking a window smoothie can cause, a sharp pain in your insides, tearing of intestines, and over all death. We are not responsible if anything are to happen to you or anyone else you give this smoothie to. If you have any problems while drinking the window smoothie, seek medical help as soon as possible.

Hi, I’m Zara! I really like to read, write, and do arson. Anyway, that’s pretty much it.

Dailies!
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July 5th
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Weeklies!
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July 8th

Free writes!
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July 5th

In-cabin!
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