Hi....so...its been a while sense I've visited this studio...but...well.....everything's a lot worse. its hard to say it but i have suicidal thoughts 24/7. but....just so you know...I'm safe. i....i trust everyone around me. I won't do it. I trust that they'll bring me through somehow. So I'm safe fo now. Doesn't mean i have to like it though. it IS depression by the way. severe depression. metaphor time:
i feel......so much more like sans than any of you can imagine. the only differences are: 1. he actually has a reason.
2. he has papyrus.
i am a silly, pun loving, joke-ster, with a dark side, and hides a lot of it from friends. but what i don't get is how it fits... this awfulness has become too much a part of me to not be included in my personality anymore. i mean, it just doesn't make sans! (see what i did there, sans, instead on sense....) "hey! i'm your friendly, neighborhood, pun loving, pacifist, DEPRESSED, comedian! Nice to meet you!"
it just stands out...unless.....
unless the only way it fits into my personality....
is that its so ludicrous...
t h a t i t s f u n n y
I don't know what to do. its like i'm being torn in two by two sides. but half of me feels AWFUL, and the other half feels fake! don't worry. i'm staying determined. please help as much as you can...however little. i can't live like this...
if any of you are working through something similar, my advise it:
1. don't starve yourself.
2. don't kill yourself.
3. keep holding on with everything you've got! don't give up no matter what! and keep holding on even if there isn't anything to hold on to.
ya thats basically the end. i've needed to get this off my chest for a good 3 years now. thank you for reading my crap.
thank you. you're all so kind, you're all so amazing! TYSM!
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"hold on" - @jet_123-lol
i'm trying :) -b
"its gonna be ok blizzard" -
anonymous who is no longner anonymous but is Shazamm
"I only have 1 parent, but both of them are gone right now for a VERY LONG TIME. I feel ya."
"i'm so sorry! when they come back i'll be happy 4 you" -b
"Hang in there Blizzard! <33 " - @SassyD
i will thx! -b