This is just a bit of a venting studio- so I'm deeply sorry if you don't want to be here or think these kind of things are annoying..^^'
Okay...so- my grandmother is being a complete JERK to me.. She's been doing this almost my entire life, and I've never really thought much of it..
But recently it's gotten worse..
She screams at me for being myself. She is very homophobic, and figured out that I'm lesbian and demisexual.. Let's just say she didn't really take that well..
Also, she has been forcing me to get all of my homework done in a matter of minutes. Which causes me to get very poor grades on things and even not turn some things in on time. My stress is going up so quick because of this...
A couple years ago I was diagnosed with depression, but was fine and well within' a few months.. although now I feel even worse than I did back then.
And recently I was diagnosed with clinical paranoia which has been affecting my sleep..
This is is what scares me the most about the whole situation though:...
A couple weeks ago, when this all started happening again, I randomly got the idea that being dead would be better than living in my own home. This...thought actually scared me.. But for some reason the idea of dying appeals to me right now... I mean, no one in real life (except @--K-Sans--) even really cares about me. I barely have any friends because most people are too weirded out by me to even talk... and both of my parents are in jail.. my brother's in college now, so I don't get to see him much anymore. So....I don't feel like I have a purpose in this world anymore...^^'
Although, I have to thank you all.. You guys are really helping me mentally.. and I care about each and every one of you deeply..
Thank you all,