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“ the means of justice in the court of the stars. ” a northernkit application [] tfcrp [] august 2026
the means of justice in the court of the stars.
|| a northernkit application (tfcrp) ||
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shoot, shoot, shoot! we forgot the cool subheader! (we did?) what a bad first impression! can’t you do anything right!? (i’m trying!-) Can’t you stop giving bland excuses for your incompetence?!
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..okay whatever. let’s just.. start from the top.
“Souda! Kore kara da ze.”
dou kangaetemo watashi wa warukunai - kuroneko
Mindless rambling leads to incoherent and inconsistent ideas. I hope I portray the opposite.
Or maybe I’ll make no point at all.
Two ends of a productive spectrum- balanced on the line of how language and ideas are comprehended.
I don't intend to be memorable.
I don’t intend for this application to be memorable.
But if it sticks with you after you're done reading?
I'd say that maybe you don't need to be fancy to have a good application.
t.o.c.
section i. (intro)
a. about me
b. rp history
c. activity level // longevity
d. kit i’m applying for // why i want this kit
section ii. (personality + identity + delve)
a. future identity (sexuality, gender, etc.)
b. personality (simplified+detailed)
c. character traits/ideas
section iii. (trivia + dynamics + misc.)
a. trivia
b. family relationships/dynamics
c. misc.
section iv. (conclusion)
a. conclusion
Well, let’s get it started, shall we? I’m sure you’re waiting to be impressed.
As if truthful positivity was used at all in language.
Words don’t tend to match emotions, haven’t you heard?
..No, I’m sure you haven’t.
We, as individuals who seek belonging, aren’t often honest with each other.
A common fear of rejection binds us in a life of lies.
So we choose not to address what painfully obvious issues that hide within us.
Honesty is a privilege, not a necessity.
section i.
Meet the user; @quilliamjuicing !
Yo, what's good? The user's @quilliamjuicing - college degenerate and scholarly moron here; who's gender and pronouns are fluid like that of the sea. Just call me whatever, I don’t even care.
What, you want me to say more?
I doubt anyone would really care about nonsense ramblings like mine, but if you insist- I'll talk about me if you just give me some time to think.
You certainly must have taken the long way around if you find yourself here scrounging about on my application; I hardly advertise myself to the public roleplaying community when it comes to these little things, so if you found me- I don't know what you're doing here, truthfully. I wish I could say anything more than that- but there isn't much to say. I don't know.. you want a lollipop for your good work? For just clicking a few buttons and jumping on a forum that you probably have little to no business doing here? I'm not saying like I shame you- and of course, we've all been there. Exploration is a natural craving; the same as wanting to play video games after a long day of work.
Well, I honestly applaud that kind of behavior. You're like me; finding any sort of reason to get out of work and just simmer down a bit. You want a break. You want to have fun! So if you're looking for such a thing, then I assure you with great certainty that you have found what you sought out. I'm nothing but fun. Sure, finding my little hidey-hole is a bit of a foolish, but almost admirable sort of accomplishment. And hey- you know how we learn something new every day? Well, how about you learn about me! Sure sure, you might be someone who's heard of me before- or at least recognizes me from a different time; a different climate. for those who remember me- welcome back. For those who don't, let me give you a refresher. I'm kinda what I like to refer to myself as a “washed up Scratch celebrity.” I once was one of those bigshot creators with a dorky little comic and a dream- a dream that I would be famous someday and be placed among the greats. I spent years breaking my back on a story that I grew to despise- work that would mean nothing the moment I stopped posting. Fame moves too fast; and it was never going to be my style. And yet I tried so hard, determined to prove myself to a bunch of eight year old children! Wow, what a life! Wow, little Quilliam must have had true hopes of her famer being worth something back then! But then I had a realization that truly altered my focus of artistic talent; why does fame even matter?
Short answer- it doesn't! I didn't have to be dependent on wanting followers or wanting to have a popular comic- I could simply just dig a hole to bury myself in and leave behind a comic that was essentially, clipping my wings and taking away from my full, wonderful potential! So I took a shovel and laid my old name to rest. No more @-Quillow-, it was nice knowing you! Once that account was done and out- I now find myself paroling here; the @quilliamjuicing account. It's not much, but it's far nicer than what fame offered. For once, it's quiet. I can respond to everything before the end of the week for once. When I can hear myself think for once- every thing I used to find important is completely and utterly useless! And now, I can enjoy the things that I want to put my time into. Sure, I'm still a person who's got interests like Beetlejuice, Danganronpa, Jujutsu Kaisen, Smiling Friends and Chiikawa- but I hope by now I can escape that fame that only labeled me as the “Creator of Willow Walkers.” I want to be more. I want to be an artist- who isn't just seen as a representation of a lame, confusing comic.
roleplaying experience;
Man, I think I’ve been doing this “roleplaying thing” for far too long; you’d think it would be something that I would be able to grow out of at one point- but I guess it just clings to you. My characters grow with me- yet I don’t know if that’s a good thing or if it’s completely and utterly pathetic to say. Doesn’t matter, I’ll say it anyways. I’m not afraid to be childish. I’ve been that way from the start of my Scratch journey. And what happens with the passage of time no matter who you do; things change. Violently fast. For example- I started roleplaying in minuscule, short-lived roleplays that hardly lasted more than a year- beginning in 2020 and finding its end in 2021. I had four characters from two separate roleplays; Sleekmoon, Foxtrot, Copperflick and Pebblerun. Crazy to think that what seemed so important is hardly a thought in my mind nowadays- as if there’s a chance that I bother to remember them at all. But that’s the fun in roleplaying! Everything changes, so you’ve got plenty more chances to evolve, and try again- move outside your comfort zone and try to create something truly memorable. So I tried. And failed- miserably- when I first joined tfcrp with a rather basic and plan character; killed because of a lack of care for the environment that the roleplay at the time supported. But then the community got better- and so did my writing. At least for a little while. No journey is without its losses; and the moment I returned back to the roleplay in 2022 with Shorepaw, I broke my arm and lost any sort of motivation I had for the character. But when my arm healed- so did my motivation. I finally got my grasp on things with Balladerstwhile- and although I questioned what on earth an erstwhile was- I finally had a character that I gave meaning to. Someone who really showed me what tfcrp was capable of. What creativity lied within the community; how I could grow my ideas based on what I had seen around me. Truthfully, it wasn’t my characters that made me stay. It was the people behind those characters. And then when ballad was said and done, I returned with possibly, my magnum opus. Evedaisy. A name that inspired many when it came to joining the roleplay- my guilty favorite and I loved him dearly. I then had Solacespindle, who didn’t last nearly as long- but she had the most depth out of all of my lovely characters. I could rattle on and on about the characters I’ve had and the ones I enjoyed writing about the most; but frankly I don’t think you would care, so why should I? All that really matters is the characters I have now. Marmotbane. She has been around since February- and I certainly don’t plan on leaving her story anytime soon. And right behind her is Coltishkit- my son who… may or may not exist (we’ll see, it just may take some time (or so I hope))- but he’s been a part of my life since.. September of last year. (Oh god, has this poor guy been waiting to exist for a year? Good grief.) No matter what- I try to give my characters lives that feel real; that they aren’t just tossed because I feel like it. I want to give each of them a purpose; something that makes them feel alive.
Characters that aren’t just there for me to claim; they deserve to have a claim in my life as well.
activity levels // longevity
See, I don’t like to label my time, nor my availability by numbers anymore. It used to be way easier being confined in that little box you live in until you graduate high school- and then suddenly- pop! You don’t have a clue of how often you’ll be free to stick around. But by all means, I’m not just going to abandon scratch- never have. I’m quite adamant on making sure that my characters are frequently present in their plots- and as I slowly begin to process my way through college, I’m sure I’ll have an easier time being able to find my free time and availability. But for now, if you wanted an estimate? I’m probably active 80% of the time- I check Scratch at least once a day (at least on this account- the others are all basically inactive at this moment), and I always try to find time to start threads frequently.
But outside of Scratch, my activity is far more fluid. I’m online very, very frequently when it comes to just basic things in my life. It’s required to be online nowadays- tree murdering is becoming an art of the past. So if I can’t find time to roleplay one week; know that in place of that missing time, I’ll fill it with my ramblings about said characters- when I get a chance to have a roleplay character; I frequently think about them- even if they appear inactive or unused. Marmotbane is an example of this. She hasn’t had any threads in about a month- and that is simply because I am currently figuring out where I want her arc to go. None of my characters remain stagnant in their lives- just in real life, they change. And that’s the best part of role playing to me. To create something unique, something new. Putting countless hours into a fictional little cat; while it’s slightly embarrassing to admit- why should I care? It doesn’t matter what people think of me! I’m perfectly fine with embracing cringe. And if I have to embrace cringe to give this kit the life that he would deserve; then of course I’d do it a thousand times over. After all, that’s dedication. “Toughing it out” through thick and thin as if you’re trying to prove a point.
And the point I’m trying to prove? That I wouldn’t let Northernkit’s life go to waste. I don’t often let them go so fast, anyways. Marmotbane already sealed her fate, and so has Coltishkit- even if he has yet to breathe life into this roleplay. I have promised both a life of love and freedom, a long life. If I were to receive this special kitten; you can rest assured that I would strive to have him live far longer than the bare minimum- I can assume perhaps 75-80+ as a rough estimate. But I even doubt the security of such a statement- because this version of Northernkit- my ultimatum to beginning this application- has a far more powerful reasoning to my tentative decision to attempt applying for such a splendid creature.
kit i'm applying for // why i want this kit/why i should have this kit
Before we get into the specifics as to why I’m applying for this kitten, it would probably do me well if I restated who I am applying for, in case you haven’t gotten the memo yet. I am officially applying for Northernkit of Riverclan; or as I may refer to him as, Riverclan’s embodiment of justice itself. Obviously, we can get into the details about said title later- it’s unimportant to you, the audience, for now. What I’m sure you’re dying to hear is my grand aforementioned reason for the application- and how my spectacle- is more deserving of the other applications before me.
But first, I want to address something. I’ve always thought of this question as selfish. Perhaps in its own way- it sheds a person in a negative light. When I am supposed to elaborate upon myself and why I am more deserving than others; it reminds me of a certain writing, one by Joan Didion. She describes writing as, “an aggressive, and even hostile act,” something that personally attacks the readers by forcing them to see things in your perception. Now I ask of you, dear reader- I dare you- to consider my words. What I say now is from the selfish mind of myself- why I am deserving. So see it from my eyes. Not yours. Understand why I am more deserving than you. This is a testament to my commitment.
I wish to obtain Northernkit because not only am I well versed in the art of storytelling and roleplay- taking up well over 1/3 of my life, with countless hours poured into making the hearts of fictional beings beat just the same as living entities- but I simply enjoy the art of being able to mold a character into a new brilliant idea; my ideas being one of those that I always try to expand on. There is always a why- there is an always an if that I can have my characters answer. They act as individuals- not as a canvas for me to paint. Yet that being said, my time on Scratch is vintage- I find myself teetering on the end of my inevitable departure from a site full of nostalgia; and perhaps it’s only the drive to find that nostalgia in writing that’s kept me here. But I no longer want to stay. At least, not without a grand finale. Yes, dear reader, I am proposing a simple yet provoking response to the question; I should have Northernkit because I intend for him to be my last tfcrp character. I wish to take flight from a site that has held my hand tight as I ventured out into the vast world of adolescence. I have no need for a guiding hand anymore. But if I am to leave, I want to end it off with a bang; a character to symbolize everything I stand for, and stand against. A character who can invoke questioning. A character who brings unique meaning into my life. The final chapter of Scratch; left in the paws of someone who can I enjoy knowing that they will be the last (and even if Coltishkit is born after Northernkit- it doesn’t change my sentiment. He’s been here far longer than Northernkit. If I were to have Northernkit- he would be my last application on any Scratch roleplay. Ever. I have no need to bring back old desires or try to wedge myself into communities that I do not belong in; I want to end this part of my life with the roleplay that truly started it.)
So to summarize; not only would my experience with roleplaying enhance the experience I could truly provide for the character, and that I would constantly feed my time and attention into him just the same as my other characters, but he would also be my final gift to tfcrp; the last of a linage of characters who have floated and danced around my head. Yes, it’s fairly sappy- but it has meaning. Do you think anyone else applying for him would go so far as to state that they would conclude their journey with a kit that hardly resembles anything more than a concept? That is the risk I’m willing to take. I’ve attached myself to the idea of him. And if I don’t receive him? It doesn’t matter much to me. I know that by this point, I am particularly selective to design and potential. I doubt I’d have this sort of energy or excitement towards a kit application for a while. And that’s alright. I’ll know when it’s my time to take my leave regardless.
But my Northernkit? He’d be my love poem to Scratch journey as a whole. And that is why I think I should win.
end of section i
section ii.
So what is a soul?
In it's basic elements; it is an empty vessel that is then filled with memories from a family tree,
and from those memories- comes personality; distinct to every family tree.
inherited love.
no matter how much you hide it away,
the soul will always be a part of you.
It is the way you were designed to act.
Your intentional behavior- no matter how much you deny it.
It's your truth.
The truth that you murder,
as we believe belonging is something that is earned.
- identity (wings)
- personality (design)
Your wings.
Wings is certainly a dull thing to call what is essentially your freedom- but it sounds much nicer than referring to it as something that, will be nothing more than a concept. Earned through experience- and the only change that is completely your own. Contrary to popular belief, your wings are something that are not influenced by popularity or culture; it is your experience. Who you want to be. Some can choose to deny it- but Northernkit would gladly show his. Identity and love are things that are personal, and no one has the right to take your love away from you. Love yourself, not others. That's the way everyone wants to think- so why not embrace that truth?
for Northernkit's identity, he would care not to establish who he'd like to romance in a particularly fond manner. Nor would he care about presenting himself as anything definite. Gender is something of significantly less importance to him. And from his perspective, love is also stupid and obsolete. A grand way of escaping your true purpose by feeding into another scheme. It's despicable, wanting to love someone else; it's shameful. He'd rather not have any part in it.
Northernkit will identify as aromantic from an early age- but that doesn't mean he will completely avoid romance.
Yes, although our young charming star cares not romance- he would commit the cardinal sin of engaging in it if he truly had something to gain; from any individual, from any spouse. It come be a heightened sense of self. Finding belonging. Or even a newfound feeling of control and power. But it has to be with someone who understands him.
Not every cat is deserving to know precious secrets. Love at first sight? A statement of hogwash. That is infatuation; a sickly, tricky feeling. If you love someone- it must be earned. You must earn Northernkit's trust- whether that be a she-cat, tom, or any other being. He doesn't care who it is- he just hopes they understand the requirements for loving him- or he won't love you back.
To reiterate; Northernkit would be a pan demisexual aromantic. He would possibly be partial to genderfluidity; but he most likely wouldn't care enough to actually engage with his gender.
“Just call me whatever.” is his honest response.
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Your design.
The heart of your character; who you are intended to be from birth, based entirely off of what you are given from your family. Your personality is not something that is created by you based off of new experience that allows you to grow, that's silly. We are not designed for spontaneous survival. Instinctual reflexes are just the same as personality- our design. And our design's sole purpose is to help us live; made from each of the three factors- benefactors, beneficiaries, and malefactors. This is given to us from the start- we just have to grow in life to truly discover each part of it.
Which is why it is often we tend to dislike who we are.
That's why masks were created, don't you know?
The hardest workers in our mind; always present in how we act around others- seeking to make a good impression. The gentle and kind parts of the soul- ones we prefer to reference as positive or good when stripped down to the bare definitions. But no trait is without conflict; there is no good without evil and there is no evil without good- are bodies are designed to be balanced at every turn. Alas, we like the way the word ‘good’ sounds- almost as if it’s a compliment to our character. What is good is what is right- and we always want to see ourselves as in the right.
So, what is the good in Northernkit?
First comes the art of compassion. Being kind is a talent, especially in such a dark world. Putting others before yourself is a mannerism that Northernkit has taken quite a liking to. It gives him an excuse to pour his time into the lives of others- adding significant value to his purpose when it is blended with ideals that can, overall, make a life better. Make life worth living. Showing kindness is like extending a paw to someone in a time of distress- showing that somewhere, someone sees you; even if they don't care. Sure, his kindness isn't given because it comes from the goodness of his heart- but at least the kindness stems from a place of reason. Without reason- kindness seems forced, anyways. But kindness is not just the art of empathy; it is truthfully, the ability to take the attention- and information- that lies under the body. The nicer you are to someone- the more likely you are to get closer to them. They'll want you. They'll deserve you if they devout their trust to you- show they care by coming back to you again and again.
Compassion is the foundation of friendships. Compassion is the foundation of relationships. Of trust. Th more trust he earns- the more likely he is to get them to understand, and see things his way. Understand what needs to be at play for him to fulfill his purpose- his goals. But with that kindness comes an additional factor- the ability to smooth over his true intentions by being densely responsive to any sort of negativity- a suffocating kind of sweetness is ever-present in his voice. Too sweet to be true, it seems.
His words are often laced with gentle lies- so they hide behind a blanket of compliments and remarks that would usually make one smitten to his ‘wholesome’ and ‘friendly’ comments- a poet; who treats his words with great value. “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me?” That was the saying, wasn't it? Well- once again- words have far more significance than what one would think. Words can be discouraging. Words can be weapons- not daggers, but ropes. Ropes that tie around someone's neck until it becomes their leash- that someone else holds. then they have no choice but to obey. But if your ropes are not hidden under cloth- subtly becomes a thing of the past. To be effective in your words- you must be able to risk harm; but disguise it. Sweetness makes you feel vulnerable- friendly. He understands vaguely that others tend to treat you better if you treat them the same way you would treat yourself- but he doesn't..ah, well..treat himself kindly, per say…
..Where were we? Something something- using sweetness as a method to pull those closer and hide his bitter truths within flat, fattened and sugary phrases that make him seem gentle and caring- which then leads us into his overall charismatic demeanor. He has but a simple and unassuming charm too him- not trying to impress to tightly, nor trying to appear as bigger than himself. And speaking of which- this leads into his persuasiveness itself- how words are used as tools to convince others that he will always be deserving of being in the right- and why his purpose and his beliefs are something that everyone should see the same as his. It's a blunt and a bit of a dense display- but that's exactly the point. apparently, to get anyone to understand anything; it must be said in its key elements- it's base factors. You can't give logical reasoning because, for some stupid reason, our emotions tend to outweigh our logic. So if you put it as flat and objectively as you can- by making them see the clear side just by entangling words with truths and lies to the point where they can't feel around for a correct answer- it becomes easier to convinces others to trust you. To understand you. All it takes to understand Northernkit is just by seeing his reasoning. And by seeing everything the same as he does- they walk one step closer to finding and achieving true hope. But, when it comes down to it, he simply just tries to maintain a put-together, confident persona that tries to resolve issues in a civil manner. This charisma is the starting point for the building of the mask, a secondary character which extends Northernkit further- a character that he portrays in every action- a new shell that he later grows into. But in order to be an actor, it is necessary to go along with the stage. His charisma helps with that- being able to move with ease; keeping a pleasant, friendly smile on his face; being receptive to others and responding in a relaxed tone.
But having a charismatic appeal means nothing if you cannot restrain yourself from putting yourself above others. Obviously, being humble is not just about accepting praise with grace- it is a precautionary measure of measuring your patience and your respect for others. Discouragement is a battle cats face often. If you accept praise with haste and with eagerness; you take away the chances that another may be able to receive that same praise. And, while we mention it- praise is useless to begin with! Encouragement from others has no place in this world- especially if our key drive is to focus on ourselves for no reason. It leads to an imbalance- too much praise for others increases feelings of hatred and madness; and then others feel like they have to work harder for something that the other had no credit to give. But at least by being humble, you start looking less desperate- something to plug the hole of your growing incompetence that boils within.
But of course, what god can a friend be if they can't digest fun in a healthy and flamboyant manner? That's what his vivacious side is supposed to represent- unrepressed freedom pulled together by the joy he finds in making special connections with others. Without joy- the world feels one dimensional and flat. Good must be seen in everything; even if it bothers or annoys you or unsettles you; life is something to appreciate. And you can only experience it once (as Northernkit certainly doesn't believe in reincarnation through other means of life- this is it. This is your one chance to try and be apart of something truly brilliant.) He carries himself with pride, and always seems to sport a lively and spirited bounce in his step. From a bland viewpoint- he seems unbreakable in spirit and in mind.
For the most part, we tend to carry the good parts of yourself around with a smile- both seen when you are truthful, and when you lie to others as a mean to fit in with new company. The good parts are what everyone wants to see out of you- the benefactors earn you what you are seeking. So regardless is Northernkit acts one with the stage or if he chooses to quietly embrace the side of himself that he hates (does that sound anything like how I'm supposed to act?? (I'm sorry..))hides, the benefactors remain active in all parts of his routine, and often outshine the other areas of his majestic and dreamy role.
+ compassionate, sweet, captivating, charismatic, humble, vivacious, persuasive.
Our mannerisms that are benefitted by the positive and open ones that overall, control how we behave around others. these are the neutral-the outspoken that lie dormant in everyday life. They act systematically and without much application of logic or focus; they are really what comes after instinct- how our instinct is calibrated into our bodies- through controlled methods of sending and receiving patterns. While none of these are excessively negative or hurtful, they tend to influence set ‘codes’ in our minds- ones that tell or to ‘fight or flight’ or ‘rest and digest.’
For Northernkit, each of his decisions is conducted immediately by unflawed and direct commands coming from his cerebral intellect before emotional values flood his senses. What comes first in this kit's mind is the logical appeal- what is the best way of resolving a problem; and what would appease his firm moral code? By catering to his inner ego more often than not- this may make his decisions seem heartless or uncaring. And it's understandable where those epiphanies may come from because of how quick he'll be to act on what he has determined on right. But in reality, it is quite the opposite. He seeks to find the answer that would benefit the greater sample of the population. The choice that would give greater justice to those who would need it. He doesn't tend to get caught on his emotions nor think about the negatives of a choice that would harm a smaller grouping of individuals if he chose a result with greater positivity- he must act in the moment before it is too late. However, he always tries to make it clear that no matter how he may act in the spur of the moment, he never means to be hurtful in his actions- not in a way where he would want anyone to suffer greatly. He wants to make sure that everything he does that harms someone is not because he wants to- but it's just a part of his purpose. He needs to hurt others if he wants to make them see the best out of the world. So, Northernkit tries his hardest to appears unaggressive and soft. Yes, he knows that he is still malicious and scheming from a certain standpoint- but he doesn't go out of his way to harm others in violent manners. That takes away from someone's joy they find in the earth- a key factor to Northernkit's purpose; and part of that being to make everyone see the hope that dwells silently below.
He's sometimes even slightly more feminine in his actions- taking a more dainty approach to his use of vocabulary- an effeminate character that while may not express true female-aligning identity; steers away from typical masculine behaviors; such as courage and bravery. Northernkit in the end, only cares about being seen as a friend- not a weapon. If you sharpen yourself for the art of battle; your words lose meaning- and you are seen as only as a weapon because that is what you made your kills become. By trying to accustom yourself to polite and delicate manners; you strengthen your mind for other goals- such as friendship. Friendship is a rather sad term for it however- he has no intent to be ‘friends’ with anyone- or that means that he would have to be open to cats. And if there's anything that he would refuse faster than the speed of light- it would be to hold his bare emotions up for others to mangle and destroy. Northernkit is a delicate flower who must preserve his emotions- he doesn't want to be hurt. He doesn't want others to know his issues or he would suddenly have to rely on someone else to keep his secrets- to be dependent on them for his own survival. It must be the other way around. It has to be that way. Or his mask exists for no reason at all. And how sad would that be? ..how utterly dumb and pathetic.. No. He must exist with the intent to make others understand. To make him be their saving grace.
So he holds every cat he knows- whether that be family, friend, fiend or foe alike- tightly on their own leashes. He restricts the freedom of others by being crushingly present in their lives; seeming to be there always in anyone's time of need- a convenient shoulder to lean on. But by Northernkit offering his own precious efforts at providing solidarity- they owe something to him. Their mind. Their bodies. He will protect them and make them understand his point of view for their own good- paternalistic behaviors becoming difficult to weave away from the longer you know the supposed wonderful and beautifully put together tom. Befriending Northernkit is a thing to do with cautious; not in the manner that he is dangerous- but in the manner that he would do anything for you to keep you safe and under his looking glass- by any means possible.
It's a suffocating kind of love. Oh, he loves everyone he knows so dearly. Every cat is special and he wishes to make that clear to any new cat he may come across. Each cat is unique, despite what they may say about history repeating. Each cat is beautiful regardless of their crimes or their ‘sins-’ by no individual being alike, there is far more to appreciate about them. And he fears that no cat can understand that beauty because everyone is so caught up or being perfect- or achieving their greater destinies.
If his siblings start to explore to places he can't reach- his efforts to change the world would be for naught. So with all of his heart, he protects by making them know that he will never let anyone go without him. He can do everything for them. Create a space where they can belong while at the same time- enforcing his ideals and creative standards to make them the best cats they can be.
Because no matter how great they may feel about themselves; there is always a way to take another step forward towards true justice.
But Northernkit feels deeply misunderstood deep down because of one singular fact; that his ideas go unrepresented in their time- obsolete because he tends to steer away from the idea of the dead guiding them from above in a place called Starclan. Or to go even further, his purpose is something completely defiant against the logic of their own law. No one understands the world like him. It is his iconoclastic followings that make him feel isolated; the first issue that made him create his mask. He doesn't want to believe in anything that he cannot confirm; nor does he care much about Starclan to begin with. Letting the dead control your life is overrated- and is a mere excuse for staying in a straight, centered line. And I know, said ideals such as purpose have been teased for far too long as you read through this application. And I promise you, you'll get there in time. But first, it's key to understand what traits Northernkit loves- and what parts he hates. Why and how. Ask the question loudly in your mind;
What burdens Northernkit so greatly that he molds it into his life's work?
these aspects tend to act in automation; the default settings of Northernkit's character. How he wants to be seen in the eyes of others. While it is not prioritized as often as the benefactors- the efforts of benefactors can help concentrate the effectiveness of the beneficiaries.
= cerebral (in terms of his logic), unaggressive, iconoclastic, effeminate, paternalistic.
When I refer to any living thing as selfish, do know that I say it with no ill intent. It is in our nature to be greedy. Cruel and even hurtful, in some manners. Nature is not forgiving- so we do not intend to be weak or dull. An animal without the drive to survive is hardly an animal at all. By definition, we all must be cruel to survive. That is how we identify threats- how we weed through lies to see the mangled truth that we try to avoid. And although it may hurt to admit, deep down, we know we are nothing without our negatives. If everyone acted the same- acted without our ‘fight or flight’ side to ourselves- just imagine how stagnant and lame our lives would be! Everyone would act for themselves- there would be no point in making friends, making enemies. It would just be us, us and our thoughts. And everyone knows that our thoughts tend to be deceiving. There’d be no point- no purpose- to our lives. Why would anyone want that? It’s better to embrace our anger- our selfishness. Even if you hate it so. It's a part of you. Begrudgingly.
In order for his efforts to be convincing to truly be effective- he must impose complete and utter control over the others. To step forward with such a command in his eyes that screams the words, "Look at me and understand that I am the only one who can possibly understand you. That I alone am the only one who can help you." Persuasiveness cannot work if you do not directly affirm your own ideas- and you can't be gentle with your words if you want you voice to come out any louder than a whisper. Northernkit is keen to assert himself when it's needed- he doesn't hold back on being assertive if it makes someone want to listen to him more. He will take control of a conversation just to get a point across- or to turn his tongue to discourage others from forming any arguments against him. Arguments are more than arguments to him; they are tests of his faith in what he believes in. And if he doesn't ‘win’ every conversation he engages in- he has failed at showing that he has faith in himself. And to be a leader- to wear the mask he prizes so greatly- he cannot lose. A leader who loses his fights is someone that can easily be shamed and looked down upon by others- and then in a flash- you are nothing but irrelevant, and your efforts would have been for naught. He cannot become irrelevant. He will not be suffocated under doubts. He will remain in control through thick and thin- something that contributes to his tendency to be possessive when it comes to those who he cares about. (Which is, in retrospective, any cat he will have met throughout his time living.)
Northernkit is also too cautious when it comes to being truthful; he can never be honest with someone until he knows that they are devoted to him- that they want to be a part of his life to the point where if he told them to jump off of a cliff- he would hear bones crack. His caution is an instinctive urge to protect himself- to always observe before acting- then acting on what he observes quickly and efficiently. Sure, it makes him look bitter and mistrusting (which he is to certain degree), but he’s only doing so because he doesn’t want anyone to get to close to him. He lets his negatives be an open part of him- or at least the ones that would benefit him in any manner. He doesn't hide the parts of himself that make him stronger- he embraces them with love.
Northernkit doesn't like the idea of sharing his tender relationships with other cats; if he meets a cat who truly means a lot to him- they must be his and his alone. He would be all they would need- he would be a shield, a defender for them in their times of need- as long as he was the only one that mattered to them. The concept of friends is a stupid premise. Why risk having several when you can have a singular ‘friend’ who would only treat you with respect and love you and share his visions with you? Wouldn't that matter more than fickle things that would struggle to find uplifting moments because others probably have high priorities that would be above your safety? Your comfort? No. He needs you. And you need him. he'd make you understand through words- you'd make you understand by holding you close regardless of what you want. The voiceless can stay voiceless; and Northernkit can speak for the both of you- even if it isn't what you want, it's what he wants. And everything he wants is for the betterment of the clan- not for himself. So know that he'd never use his voice to damage you. It would help- just letting him take your words. Wouldn't that be nice? To be free from responsibility and leave it in the paws of someone else? That's why he cares so much for you. So you indulge in a life of love and sloth if you take his hand- stay with him- and follow his lead. Doesn't that sound nice? What part about that could possibly be bad? why is wanting to protect someone to help them seen as such a bad thing? I don't understand!
Northernkit is keen to use his voice often; and it's a guilty pleasure of his to sustain his loquacious manners. Talking is one of favorite things to do- you need a voice to make language comprehensive and fluid. He needs to be sure that his goal can be interpreted in the finest details- that it cannot be rivaled by opposing logic because it is the truth. And he tends to use his rantings as a way to drown out the thoughts of the other party participating in a conversation: as they say, “all eyes on me!” He surrounds his lies- his imperfections- with mindless chatter as a way to distract from the words that he twists; which can easily be seen through if someone were to examine what he says- following the cracks in his words that may lead to his own downfall. He is also- as any cat should be- full of himself. As it’s been brought up before; part of that selfishness is pride in ourselves, because once long ago- that was all we had to count on. You had to make yourself feel good somehow. Although it doesn’t go to an outwardly bragging extends, he’s taught himself that deep down, he is better than the rest of any clan because he has already discovered what he needs to do in his life- he has a direct connection between his actions and his purpose. He doesn’t have to idly stand by and discover himself when he already knows what he’s supposed to be. A guide. A Saint, in some cases. And he’d be more than willing but to argue and disagree with any idea that would stand against that fact- leaning very disputatious when it comes to how he handles controversy and being challenged- he loves being rivaled. He enjoys being able to exhibit his purpose in action; he loves being clear in his logic and forcing others to have no choice but to listen to his words if they want a chance at engaging in an argument fed by strong moral premises. He enjoys telling people they are wrong. He enjoys twisting the perception of what is good and what is bad- because to him, there is no divider between the two when both sides contribute to the same, greater project. Everything will fall into the same set of balance by the end; life and death, sun and moon- halves to a whole that make a complete and balanced circle; every thing finding its justice. Agreeing with others doesn’t have to be a part of the balance- there must be someone to go against the tide to ensure that everything is balanced. Northernkit is that someone. It brings him more joy than anything else- not communication, not exploration; but simply being able to indulge himself in pleasures that sustain him and him alone. It’s his hedonistic mannerisms that not only feed into his self confidence more and more- but by also keeping beings close to him and make them love him; he can easily engage in self-indulgence. His pleasure comes from making others believe in him- fueled by the love of others that makes him feel whole.
..And then, there is a deep weakness that dwells inside of him- one he wishes that he could be rid of; but there's no getting rid of who you are. This is the main factor as to why the mask was created- he hates pitying others- and he hates how emotional he'll become over the most frivolous things. Everything seems so wasted when he takes a deep look as the workings of the world. How he only sees a crater of where life used to thrive. How when cats grow- they forget what made life fun; what made it enjoyable. He weeps for each youthful memory lost. Crying for all the hopes of a better world lost when someone simply states that they have to “grow up.” The world has sustained far too much loss. Too much misery. An imbalance of despair- that he can never fix, no matter how much he reaches out to grab it. His weeping self is the embodiment of doubt and regret itself- wondering if their truly is any purpose to life; if he exists for no reason- meaning that there is no reasoning to strive for love and excitement? if he can't change a thing about the world- and life truly spins in a cycle- what's the point of.. anything?
So he cries. And he feels more pain than anyone else; because even if he suppresses deeply within- drowning his sadness and misery under a mask which only reflects the opposite- he still feels that he will always be.. lesser. He will never find his worth. And it doesn't help when he sees just how much hurt others withstand in their own lives. No one deserves to feel alone- so why were our bodies designed only for ourselves?
His deep emotional understanding causes him to often be far too ready to speak of his fears; something that he resents and deeply dreads. No one can know that he is weak. No one can know that he cries and wails over problems that only he can see- problems that they could care less to understand.
The mask is created purely to silence his emotional depth. To convince himself, somehow; that he has found true purpose in his life.
The malefactor functions in a less autonomous manner than the benefactors and as a result, are more present in waking thought than active speech and action. The malefactors are there in case of an “emergency,” where other methods need to be used in order to keep dominance wherever Northernkit may stand. That doesn't mean that he ignores what is seen as bad and harmful by others- he always tries to train the parts of his malefactors; to be ready to use them at will. Northernkit will never be afraid to be insidious- inside and out.
- assertive, hedonistic, loquacious, disputatious, cautious, emotional, possessive.
Now, purpose is less controlled.
Purpose is what defines your character.
The soul shapes your purpose;
and purpose itself executes it.
Your reason for your grand existence.
No being goes without purpose,
or so Northernkit believes.
Most purposes go undefined-
but he has found a way to describe it in its bare elements.
A way to make everyone understand him.
- Worldview
- Dissection of personality
What does Northern believe he was meant to live for? That is the question that essentially builds purpose- is it the goal that you seek to put above any other objective in life; it is the reason you find yourself walking amongst the other beings in this world. Most don't intend to follow their purpose- or perhaps the concept of purpose is not something that can be found; yet Northernkit believes he has discovered his- his invisible string that drags him forward.
Worldview.
The world is a complex set of organisms which all live within their set ecosystems and boundaries; everything is supposed to work together- in harmony. that is the way the world was designed; animals were meant to stand animals- prey and predator who fulfilled basic lives; no high level of consciousness is there to guide them nor correct their mannerisms. These complex organisms become simple figments of thought when everything else is taken away from the picture and you observe their reason for living; to feed or to be fed to others. The world is- well, was- simple and easy to follow. No one had anything that heightened their complex- that magically made them organize creations beyond that of what was intended. Clan cats began to separate themselves from their animal selves- to heighten themselves and supposedly create order by creating borders and territories- to force a divide between them. But it didn't help separate their urges. If anything- it created restriction. It created greed, wrath. dictators. And their law that was supposed to protect that peace failed- all these rules hurt families and created chaos; families split apart or forced to adhere to clan law just because they were told to. the clans grew bigger- their influence spread as the traveled the earth. Clan life became the only way to live- a marvel of creation to those who witnessed it from afar. And Northernkit has no grudges or tallies against clan cats of course- he just wishes it would change. Because those glasses that promise a perfect world are rose-tinted- just like everything else. Nothing can be perfect.
The code allows us to reject the suffering of other cats. It allowed us to shun those who couldn't get with the program. Those who were codebreakers did not belong in a clan- and they were fiercely rejected. In what way is that freedom? In what way is that peace?
No. clan life became the source of despair.
Hurt and pain that went unnoticed because the rest of clan life seemed alright and fair- but clan life is limited. From a young age, Northernkit questions why he can't be in love with someone from another clan. Or why a few cats hold so much power in a limited range; these clan leaders- their word is law. Why? How is that peace? If a power-hungry cat is elected- they could take and no one could speak out against them. If a leader tells their cats to fight for their honor at any cost- they listen; they want their place in their clan- a position that they believe is something that must be earned.
It imbalances the scale- it allows fear and despair to run rampant to keep their clans under control.
And that is what Northernkit must fight against.
Despite the raging cruelty that surrounds the clans- they pay no mind to it. All this madness- no one pays any mind to it. They are fine to let a handful cats suffer if it grands them a calm state of mind. If the peace is kept, why do they care about those who cannot live the lives they want to? Northernkit must make them see the despair. To see how unfair clan life really is. Because that is what the voiceless deserves- to let everyone see the hate that festers in the world. By manifesting that hate- becoming a target of rage and anger against how this machine functions- they can come together to see how unfair it is. To fight for hope- to fight for a brighter dawn. Helping everyone enforce the art of balance in their lives so no cat's pain goes unheard. If the clans were a method to bring cats together- then he will make it possible without having to hold all the power in his paws. To be equal- each voice needs to be heard. He will speak for the voiceless. He will be the star that the world needs. He will act as whatever they need.
He must make each each feel great pain to want to fight for love- to rise above the fear and despair.
But he needs to be a leader to make it happen. That's why he creates his mask; a better version of himself that suppresses his worst qualities as to inspire hope to the best of his ability.
Dissection of personality.
His purpose is to speak out against despair and inspire hope; a purpose he plans to fulfill by developing a fun and enjoyable persona that makes being want to listen to him- to understand his faithful cause. This persona becomes his ‘mask,’ “someone” he takes on and off that he switches between freely- the mask is meant to deny his immediate and primal instincts; otherwise- he'd be nothing but a pathetic, blubbering mess who can't speak about his passions because they would burden him with far too much grief- his doubts would be the first one to speak and he would immediately discourage himself from being open about himself- or properly using his voice.
This task requires a strong cat; someone who can bear the weight of the world on their shoulders- and be perfectly accepting to everyone. His purpose means more to him than anything else- more than anyone. He believes that it would fix lives- save lives- when the imperfections of clan life are pointed out and eradicated. He does this for the future; he acts to follow the path to guide us to a better da- never stopping to appreciate the present or reflecting on the past. What matters next is what's ahead.
He doesn't have time to humor a pathetic side of himself. In fact, he hates that part of himself greatly. He hates being emotional- he hates how much he cares about appeasing the code- appeasing the restrictions which harm more than they give. Why are they there, if so few cats decide to stay within those limitations? They drive him mad- and yet they make him oh-so-sad, looking ad thinking of the fates that could have been reversed if the clans had accepted that perhaps, these boundaries serve them no good.
The mask is the best version of himself. A friend. A brother. A son. A good member to the clan that acts as a harmless little lamb; a lamb from afar. Northernkit is a wolf in sheep's clothing- a beast that dwells inside Riverclan and wishes nothing more than to see it fall- so the clans can see their freedom; what greatness lies beyond their reach. He will not harm. He will not bite. His methods are not violent and he does not seek to use violence as methods of communication. And Riverclan itself isn't a threat; but it is not home. It will never be a home. It cannot be home if it cannot shelter all of its children comfortably- which it fails to do so at every turn.
Northernkit seeks to be strong. He seeks to become the answer.
His mask is exactly that and nothing but- something that lures those who would want to learn more about him closer.
Love and fear. Hope and despair. Two sides of a coin that should cancel each other out to create a world of peace; a world that does not have to restricted by rules- by leaders. He does not want to see suffering in a perfect world. He doesn't wish to shed tears for a world who cannot hear him. No one is listening above. It is only each other that they must rely on- and he will be the shoulder that those need to lean on.
He wants to earn the privileges in life the longer he works for the good of the beings around him- being endlessly giving to their needs and never to himself, so that one day- perhaps he will be earning of all the things that he has denied himself.
But first, he must act as a
SHIELD. To be a defender first is the most important step to establishing yourself. You must risk your body- your life- for any cost. Each action must be done with your full intent put into your heart. He must protect those who rely on him. He must keep everyone safe before himself; a soldier that yields to the words of those he loves.
SWORD. Being violent is to establish power. You must be violent to show that you are prepared to make sacrifices; that you will give up some things to receive more that will be better. You must be prepared to see blood. You must keep your words sharp- you must hold true to your command.
ARROW. A leader without wit is a coward who cannot control themselves. An arrow seeks for weakness; an arrow disarms the threat by remaining accurate in your intent. Each word you say must have defined meaning. A leader cannot speak without considering actions and words. A leader cannot use violence to resolve every problem.
SONG. He must be encouraging; he must rely on the strength of those who believe in him to be powerful. His power is not reliant on himself; his community is what makes him strong. Without community- a leader has nothing to fight for.
These four personifications come before his needs. These are what he relies on to maintain a mindset to guide him in the right direction. Without them- Northernkit would not know how to lead. But by establishing reasoning- key logic- he can come one step further to his true purpose;
Morals are a strict code that helps determine right from wrong.
But it also contributes to ethics;
what is true- what is false.
They help shape the truth you want to follow.
Morals are instincts-
instincts that you can always rely on in times of need.
- Objects of importance
- Ethics
Objects of Importance.
Each moral question first comes from simple beginnings; the morals of how we treat our family. Or rather, how our morals exclude our families. We tend to think that they see you in a different light. Not an exact light, but a different one. And it justifies exempting them from your strict standards that normally, will never have a bypass. But family is different. Family is your shelter when there is no one else to turn to. They shape you just as much as you shape yourself- you are a mix of who they are- your personality reflects both sides of your parents. Your siblings share the same blood that boils underneath your fur. You are equal to each other- you are each other's first taste at belonging.
It is important to never lose this belonging- and that means that you must exclude them from your morals- so then you can build your standard around them.
And it starts with your parents; the ones who gave you an opportunity to be something brilliant; a work of art underlined in their name- you bear their smiles and your love.
Sagesolace, you are Northernkit's inspiration. You will always be treated kindly by Northernkit. He will do whatever you ask of him in a flash- your humble son; your precious son who is ardent to being labeled as a baby for the rest of his life. He doesn't care. Whatever makes you keep loving him so- he'll allow whatever you see fit. In turn, he will always call you the childish names you desire- daddy, dad, dada. Your warrior name will never be spoken by his tongue; he's far too undeserving of it.
But below a surface level love and care that any son would give to his father, he loathes your protectiveness. You shelter him so- and it's stifling him so. he would never dare to address it, but he hates how tightly you hold him close. He wants to provoke and explore the means of danger- and with you refusing to leave his side (along with Baylily's annoying and tiresome cautious measures)- he can't do what he wishes. And that is your fault. He blames you for making his lack a true directive to find that beauty in the earth- because he could never see it for himself when he is smothered and drowned by your honeycrisp-sweet love. \
But Northernkit will never address it. He can't. He's made a promise to never hurt you the moment he was born. And he will always stick by that faithful promise.
From a distant standpoint, he respects you as his father, and he will always treat you the same as Sagesolace; being attentive to your many and plentiful needs, always standing by your side in times of emergency, and if need be- choosing to ignore the traits that annoy him so very much.
No being can be perfect, Northernkit understands that perfectly well. But the determination to fix his childhood by blatantly reversing what happened in yours will never fix a family to be perfect. You say you are quiet and keep to yourself- and yet, you take a far larger step than you should just to coddle your kits and keep them safe. He doesn't need to be affirmed that he is loved; Northernkit already knows that. Your overprotectiveness is too large of a barrier that prevents him from earning your trust.
Do you believe that your kits will not be successful unless you ensure that they can live life in the most mild manner ever? He hates your fear- and how you express it through your teachings. Fear is natural; embrace it and you won't have to worry. Northernkit isn't stupid enough to run far from home- so he wishes that you would have even the slightest bit of faith that his kits can monitor their own safety.
But that doesn't matter much. You will always be papa, father, dad. He may not be as so cautious to avoid your warrior name however- he doesn't believe it will hold such a tight importance compared to Sagesolace. However, you will be the only cat he turns to at the first sight of a threat- since you seem too prioritize safety so keenly. You will be his shield; just as much as he will be yours.
Of course, he'd never want you to share his burdens that he's placed upon his shoulders- so you will never know much about him besides seeing a friendly, and joyful character who is always looking for new opportunities to prove and express himself. He refuses to teach you about his purpose; you deserve better than to join him in an impossible goal. So, your relationship will always remain shallow. It becomes increasingly more obvious the longer you stay together; when you see just how flat he appears. Kind, innocent, sweet and loving. That's all that would define him to you.
But that's all he would ever allow himself to be to you. He defiantly rejects the malefactors that design him to be cruel to you. You are his to protect; to keep. He will have you in your own isolated bubble- his and his alone. He wouldn't let many cats grow close to you because he would never want any cat to hurt you; but of course, he can't control every aspect of your life.
But one thing he can control is how you perceive him. Things will remain unchanging between your relationship as you age- he will be nothing but a fragment of a memory in your eyes. But if you play along and embrace it, just imagine the life of persistent love and energy that will prevail.
Of course, he will think of you in dire situations. He will always be there to clean up after you- or kitsit if you have no choice. But he has no intention to grow close to his other blood unless you actually try to make an effort to befriend him. His ‘real’ family will always be in front of you. But that doesn't mean that be entirely loathes or hates you. It's simply just an ordeal of where he chooses to place his attention. And to cats who possibly may never matter to him- that attention runs on a very thin and breakable line.
However, these mannerisms act.. differently, to those family members who no longer walk the earth. He may try frequently to unearth memories about the deceased parts of his tree- so that their memory may not be forgotten. To forget a loved one is one of the worst things you can do; they deserve to be just as active in moral lessons and stories as anyone else.
They do not deserve to fade when all they did was die. That is not the worst thing that someone can do.
It's natural.
It's normal.
so now we have the few exceptions labeled in the mind- the few that do not need to be a part of his purpose; or tied in ways too cruel for his family. He wants to make sure that he is always seen in good graces in their eyes; a place for him to be pure. To feel as close as he can to being normal. From their teachings- morals are born. what do you stand by? what do you want to fight for? Basic questions that strengthen your ability to receive knowledge; to understand what you want to live by. But morals cannot be developed without understanding what you seek in the long run of life- what lies outside of your purpose that still holds great value to you.
Ethics
From those that we love, we develop our morals based off of the ethics that we inherit from them. These ethics become our key morals; our very own compass that operates the rest of the body. For Northernkit, his parent's kind and moral teachings land well into Northernkit's internal code- something he chooses to follow first before the warrior code.
Treat other the way you want to be treated.
Northernkit tends to act far too soft towards others; he wants to be treated gently- to which he often does for others. He treats other cats as if they are breakable dolls; to take more caution when it comes to controlling a forked tongue. He understands that his sense of humor is fairly crude- but he doesn't want to frighten anyone or steer them away. It would break his heart to make an enemy. Unfortunately, this does mean that Northernkit often doesn't firmly set boundaries with others; and he doesn't care what others say about him (although he definitely does.)
Be kind.
If there is one thing the world needs less of, it is bullies who bullies with the intent to commit actual harm. While Northernkit harms others, he doesn't do so because he wants them to break. He wants others to see life the way he does- by taking note of unfair circumstances- and speaking up against them. But he doesn't want to be mean- or seen as mean. He will remain kind even if the conflicts outside the clan get worse. He will remain kind. He must remain kind.
Mind your words.
Words are far stronger than we give them credit for. They can be weapons just as much as stones can be. Words can dive deep into memories- words can twist the perception of those memories. Words can create false realities- words can make people believe even the worst attempts at lies. Words are to be treated with caution. If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say it at all.
Belief- the final part of the inner body.
What you choose to see the world as;
What you think a perfect world is.
It's subjective in hindsight,
but it's individuality between beings makes it far more endearing and appreciated.
It gives us a certain set of standards to follow that match with our morals-
what we choose to acknowledge.
What we choose to observe and understand.
- Questioning our worldview
Questioning our worldview.
It is in a cat's nature to be curious. It is in a cat's nature to question the world around them; and jump hastily to their own conclusions. But each aspect of life must be observed- we do not categorize ‘life’ into a single grouping. We address flora, fauna, death- the list goes on. Our beliefs are unique because we ask ourselves a series of questions subconsciously; allowing us to develop our own distinctive systems of beliefs. One of the many things that makes life so special- it is never seen the same through each cat.
Northernkit's view of death and the deceased:
What is Northernkit’s view on death? How does he associate the worth of the living to the dead- does he believe death is a good thing, or that death is a bad thing?
Things death is not:
X a good thing
X a bad thing
At the end of the day, death has no true definition as to define its virtues- because nothing comes out of it. Death is simply the end of living. But what's important about death isn't its ethical alignment- it's what death represents that matters the most in any scenario. Some see death as a wheel; a ladder to climb to guide you to the next life. Others believe that it is divine judgment; to conclude where you will spend your eternity.
And yet to Northernkit, death is none of those things. It is not an extension of your life nor an exact result of how you lived your life. There is no place that goes beyond the waking world. You have a singular life to live. The afterlife is only cold- we don't find ourselves going up any higher. Everything just.. stops. Soon, our existence becomes nothing more than a concept- and we are only found alive through the memories of others. One life to live. No higher power to fear- no higher power to control our actions.
We do not have to be puppeted around by ‘Starclan,’ something he chooses not to believe in. It feels ridiculous. Why should dead cats get any say on what he does? his actions are his choice and his choice only. He shouldn't have to even remotely think about being monitored by being who rest high above. If Starclan truly was a respectable and peaceful afterlife- he's sure that they'd rather spend it enjoying their solitude; or reuniting with family members who had passed.
He doesn't shun the cats that follow Starclan- and he respects them just the same as he would to anyone else. But his religious followings are far less spiritually inclined than such ideas; and he'd prefer to keep it that way.
Death is a challenge to your faith; a testament to see if you will truly stay true to your purpose- by refusing to fear death. Death is like a wave that crashes; then everything goes still, black and eerie. It is something to fear. So, in order to show your faith, you must not fear it; and you must not run from death. If you run from death, or deny its importance, you are therefore ignoring the potential of your purpose; and had determined your life to be worth little to nothing in the long run. If you find fulfillment in your life- then you have found your prized purpose. But running from fate itself- you turn your life into a curse; fearing death leads to needless stress, guilt and fear that will consume you- and take away from your full potential as a being. Running from death is a silly choice anyhow; it's inevitably, the same path that every life ends at. We all take different paths in life- but it's always going to end the same! Death is a part of life. We are a factor that makes that cycle function. We hunt prey that is below us to feed our children. then, in order to conduct balance- we in turn are the prey for greater beasts if they do so dare. So if you openly embrace death and the idea of dying- then you understand that your life is a gift, and you start to appreciate it more thoroughly. You can die at any moment- and that encourages to enjoy what you are given; and you make an effort to make every second new and exciting.
Those are the basic principles of the ‘afterlife’ that Northernkit believes in; straightforward and strict in their demand and their requirements.
Northernkit's view on the world:
The world is split into two categories; the earth, and the inhabitants- those are the two things that makes up the world.
Inhabitants: Animals such as cats, fish, reptiles, and etc. all count as inhabitants. Inhabitants must have two things to be considered as a part of this divine ecosystem. 1. autonomy 2. speech. Only cats can understand other cats, obviously. Speech is a natural barrier than is only shared through the classifications of species.
If a human-owned Labrador spoke to a wolf; they would understand one another, as they share commonality by being both Canidae. If a cat were to meet a tiger- the possibilities are high that they too, would understand each other. Languages are branches- each common from a firm root and extending outwards; while the language between animals wouldn't be completely comprehensible- a cat would have better luck understanding other felines than they would birds or fish. Each language as a common derivative- that is then expanded on and pushed to its finest brink. Not one voice will be the same- but all inhabitants must have their own language- so they may express their freedom. Without a voice, things such as weeds and flowers do not count as inhabitants; but they would instead be part of the earth.
As for autonomy; it's more self-explanatory than the later. They must be able to act dependently and move on their own- create ideas of their own; live as a part of a whole. Plants do not think for themselves- they are controlled by the inhabitants; and don't have a set purpose that tells them to do otherwise- they have no language; no voice.
What makes up the earth has no relevance besides feeding and sheltering the inhabitants. The physical world itself- when the inhabitants are taken away- is ugly, and holds no significance nor meaning in the world. The beings who rely on the earth are what make the world flourish. There is no beauty within the earth nor is beauty caused by the existence of the earth- it is the beauty in the soul that brings the earth beauty; each individual with a unique story- a unique love. However, the world encourages stagnation in life- it's simple complex makes it easy for cats to accept what they have; food and water and shelter being enough to please simple minds to live simple lives. They accept this ugly, hateful world. But why is the world hateful?
That hate is a direct result of the greed of clan culture and clan life- they seek so badly as to create a culture that divides themselves from the rest of the world; proving themselves as ‘less animal’ than others because they have created a system- imaginary lines known as borders which lock them in place. Wars caused for crossing these borders that were supposed to ‘establish peace’ when they have done nothing but. But with the peace they have found now- they believe that said peace will always stay. The cats begin to grow afraid of change when change would help them embrace a better life; but wanting to see the world for how it is- not sticking by fake lines that keep them locked tightly in place. What the world has embraced is sloth- making the world awful. No joy comes from the earth without work- which is part of Northernkit's divine duty.
He must burden himself with the work of fixing an ugly, lazy world by forcing change upon cats- because he sees hope to be unveiled in this world and in their hearts. There is more to life than the clans.
Northernkit's view on love:
Love comes in many forms; it is no so simply as to be one romantic love, or familial love. There is self-love. There is love in friendship. There is familial love. Love exists as a method to distract; something to fill your life with endless noise to avoid responsibility- by making it a priority of your own. To those who can properly indulge in it, he sees it as a healthy thing. But Northernkit cannot love properly in the way others may seek. He does not feel attachment to anyone besides the attachment that is forced or dutiful- that is the love he shows his family, his friends. He doesn't want to rely too heavily on those who could hurt him. He knows that his mind is delicate- if someone can see through the mask; he'll splinter and fall apart at the seams- he'll lose all his power; all his worth. He wishes that he knew how to love- but he doesn't know how. Well, ‘doesn’t know' is a bit dulled down. He doesn't want to risk love because he could wear down everything he has worked so hard to preserve- and even more so, he doesn't want someone to think lower of him by settling for a far more simplistic life of love.
And he doesn't do well receiving love either. He feels as if he doesn't deserve it- he will never deserve it until his purpose is fulfilled; or at least until he feels that he's served his purpose well. But that doesn't matter. His heart belongs to all, and he cannot trust someone to take it entirely from him. The more someone tries to get closer to him and pry out his attempt at loving them back- the faster he will be to pull away and evade this cat. Any relationship he has must remain to their benefit- and not to his.
He could never be deserving of such a thing.
end of section ii
Now we reach the end of the four directions.
Each with a set function- each that builds into a part of his soul.
I thank you, kindly, for hanging in this long through this writing.
It's not often I get to talk so fondly about nothing more than a concept;
and I've found it to be quite fun just to create something new.
From here- it gets easier.
From here, you can see all parts of the character in play.
What makes Northernkit.. well, Northernkit.
section iii.
What is Northernkits’s character motivation?
(ex. Marmot: “I want to understand how to feel loved so that I can become a better person, but my dependency on my father’s love and attention prevents me from growing as a person because I believe I am already perfect in his eyes (he would tell me if I am not to his liking.”))
Northernkit: “I want to cause intense tragedy in the lives of others to teach them to fight for finding greater enjoyment in their lives; I want to help others find their purpose by being an obstacle to force encouragement.”
What can Northernkit’s story teach?
(ex. Marmot: Learning how to live for yourself, and not for the benefit of others.)
Trusting others to be kind to your true self; and not hiding behind excuses that force you to be a different person only because you are afraid.
How could Northernkit “learn to love life?”
(ex. Coltish: Seeing the beauty in love and wanting to obtain that same kind of love- becoming dependent on the feeling of infatuation and constantly on a “sugar high.”)
Northernkit: By truly finding connection with someone that would make him want to ‘betray’ his purpose- someone who encourages him to explore and truthfully enjoy himself.
general trivia
favorites
Color- Purple (Specifically cooler hues of lavender.)
Season- Leaf-bare (Believes this season causes more determination; causing more beings to fight for hope.)
Weather- Windy and cloudy days.
Scent- All things sweet! (Loves the scent of apple blossoms the most- they remind him of his family.)
Prey- Salmon.
Craft- The art of dance and song.
mannerisms:
- Cannot, for the life of him, sit still ever. He constantly has to move about during conversation and often gets distracted by the process- causing him to sometimes forget what a conversation was about at hand or miss out on certain instructions. He often needs things to be repeated to him.
- Northernkit is shockingly good at remembering things once he's been told of them, however. His memory is a tool he uses when speaking with others- as to prove the point that they've ‘already told each other so much.’
- Northernkit's manner of speech would alter slightly as he ages older in his time; he begins out with plentiful innocent and often bubbly sort of dialogue, which transpires into leveling charm in his tone, and not often getting overly excited about certain topics like he does when he's a kitten.
love language: Physical touch. He is an incredibly grabby and snuggly cat who loves to give hugs or receive hugs; but he unintentionally forgets to ask for consent to hug or love on others often- with may make his efforts at being clingy seem rude. He just gets way too excited around people he knows and will often come and invade the personal space of others; although not for any malicious reasons.
character inspiration(s):
Nagito Komaeda (DGR2:GD) - This one is the more prominent of the two inspirations; I liked his original motivator of wanting to get the killing games started so he could have the Ultimates produce hope; but I wanted to expand on that further- and thought, “Why would a character fight for hope to begin with?” I didn't want to completely include all elements of his character- as cool as he is to analyze. I hate taking too much inspiration from characters or they don't really feel like mine; so I'd say that really only Northernkit's ‘purpose’ is the only thing that's taken from Nagito.
Monika (DDLC) - Here comes the reason for Northernkit to only be in the spotlight and to have everyone he cares about stay only with him- I took very loose inspiration of her methods of manipulating her control that are present throughout the whole game- how she slowly grows more and more obsessed with the player until a point of no control. It is all about control; how can she control the player- how can change every outcome into making *her* as the only choice; the only answer. Northernkit doesn't really take much else from her character however- really the only thing they share is a need for control and dominance over all the others.
(I remembered one that I forgot about haha)
Momonga (Chiikawa) - The demand for constant attention and love. While it remains ever-so-slightly different from Northernkit's need for attention (he likes to have attention so it would bring him reason to be attentive to their needs- in a “you care about me I care about you” relationship- Momonga just wants everything handed to them and have attention because in my own personal scope of things; they have no idea how to act and possibly just want everyone to see them so they can be like, “I'm parading in a body that's not my own and you all are too stupid to notice.”) That's literally it when it comes to this character- I just like how pushy and mean this squirrel is and I hope they get what's coming to them eventually.
imagery inspirations/symbolism(s):
- Puppet strings; strings descending from the sky that wrap around him- symbolization of his need to picture himself acting in the will of his purpose- how everything he does is not actively being chosen by him.
- Masquerades; the characterization of his mask being an actual mask that he can take on and off at will.
- Eyes; someone silently observes his performance from above.
song inspiration(s):
(I have changed the original titles of the theme songs written in the three Japanese scripts into their romaji writing for easier translation to English.)
- Dou Kangaete Mo Watashi Wa Warukunai (Even If I Think About It, I’m Not Bad) - Kuroneko
- Tengoku e Ikou (Let’s Go To Heaven) - Kikou
- Cubibibibism - NEEDY GIRL OVERDOSE
- Candy Scar - Rubyeye, C!naH
Theme song lyrical analysis:
Song: Dou Kangaete Mo Watashi Wa Warukunai (Even If I Think About It, I’m Not Bad) - Kuroneko
“ Mirror, mirror, do you want to break honestly
// I don't need you, I don't need you //
Mirror, mirror, you're too honest
// Pretending not to hear //
What's not reflected is the beauty of the heart
// Delusion, that's a delusion //
Only the dull self is reflected
// Know the reality // “
This song has a special place in my heart; it's a song that I find myself interpreting nearly the same to the author's intentional, written message. That message reflecting the idea of how easy it is to hide behind another persona- that special mask- to escape judgment or escape the fear of being unaccepted by a community; taking on a completely new version of yourself to express a better you- a fake you; but ultimately better. The song is originally, supposed to describe the feeling of being able to ‘mask’ yourself over internet personas- and for once, you're free to be someone else. It's freeing- it's a nice example of just how easy it is to overcomplicate things. It relates heavily to the mask that Northernkit chooses to wear; that flamboyant and loud personality created because not only did he want to be free of protective authority and his compliant instincts- but also created because he wants to make a drastic difference in the world. It helped him find control. It gave him control over his life- and for once, he was free to do what he wanted. By making himself be in complete control of his life by establishing his ‘new self’ (a version of Northernkit that essentially goes without emotional understanding nor emotional complexity)- this new self becomes someone determined to show that he can take care of himself- enforcing justice and being the balance that the world needs. His job is thankless, and yet he is a Saint. He has become better than his ‘old self,’ a cat who blubbered over his words in order constantly- weakening his effectiveness at truly being a shining star. A tomcat who is too afraid of harming others to address his discomfort- a team player who keeps his mouth shut because he can't properly process heartbreak. Such a wreck of a cat. A compliant and seemingly innocent cat? How boring! All that he's doing is slowly building up pent up and distressed emotions the more he tries to preserve the expectations of being a ‘good son.’ There's more to life than that. But if he continued without his mask- Northernkit would be weak. And what's the good thing in being weak? Absolutely nothing. So, this wonderful and incredibly dazzling persona is created with the idea in mine that the more he inflicts misery on others, the more he can rebalance the world. By seeing others tolerate and rise above feelings of hurt and helplessness- he feels less alone in this sad, empty world. Once they see it his way; he can give them all the kindness and attention that he'd like to- a star to shine above all. He separates his ‘righteous’ self from the weak-willed and shy kitten he used to be- who then becomes the mirror's voice to ridicule his shamed version of himself.
Meanwhile, the cat calling to the mirror image of himself is the cat of the ‘past-’ of the one that is essentially snuffed out by a larger flamboyant version of himself that while he wants to completely erase so he doesn't have to be burdened by feeling sad and constantly ashamed of trying to fix a world that cannot be changed- but no matter how hard he tries, this version of himself will always be a part of him. No matter how much he weakens it- his natural flighty behavior will somehow- be ever-present in his thoughts. But in this scenario; they separate into two different cats. The first is his complex; the one who executes being the Justice of Riverclan. Being the Justice is far more important than addressing the proper truth or being vocal about the thoughts that bubble below. The mask allows him to be someone new. A prettier, put-together cat who can be someone great. His thoughts are so unimportant and miniscule when it comes to the grand scheme of fixing ‘clan life’ as they know it, so why bother keeping his mind on himself? If he makes the mirror the only voice he turns to- the only cat he is- he can stay true to his purpose in a proper manner. Northernkit is the mirror of himself, reflecting everything he isn't- and yet, still retaining those childish loves and dreams to be adored and beloved- a goal that the ‘new Northernkit’ can fulfill. And in order to thrive, it's better to toss away the cat that only held him back- ignore it and become a new being entirely.
This chorus is a conversation between the mirror and the ‘old Northernkit-’ a timeline where the mirror is the first thing that Northernkit finds himself turning to. That he acknowledges his weakness- sees the strength of the mirror- and realizes it's potential as a better version of himself- trying to desperately find any way to break it. Somewhere- deep down- a hate festers within him. He hates knowing that the mask is the only thing that makes him a memorable character- so he questions it's strength. “Mirror, mirror you're too honest,” is Northernkit knowing that the mask highlights him as a liar just by wearing it- the mirror is everything he isn't, and yet so badly wants to me. The mirror shows exactly what he is- a liar. A liar wanting to make things go his way because he wants to be better than everyone else- to compensate for his lack of self-love. He doesn't know who he is supposed to be- but he knows that he has a goal- a purpose. Toi be the ultimate catalyst of hope and love- by forcing others into positions that require them to stand up against pain; pain that he must cause because it is too heavy of a burden for ‘anyone else.’ The method of being allowed to inflict despair into the world itself is the mirror. It speaks the truth. It tells you everything you don't want to hear. You feel lesser. It directly causes him pain- a source of despair. That's all it knows, saying things such as “I don't need you, I don't need you” and “know the reality.” And the reality is that he is a coward. The only way to run from that reality is by loving and cherishing that mirror- that mask- and making it who he is, to both discourage himself from being truly honest with himself.
Miscellaneous Information:
- The wisp of fur that goes over his left eye is upheld by small flecks of honey that is combed into his fur by using pointed seashells or clamshells that he collects from the shore of the ocean. When touched- this stylized fluff may feel sticky; so he often avoids letting others touch the top of his head- for the sake of their own fur.
end of section iii
..Right and wrong is a difficult manner.
So I choose to see it as there is no right or wrong;
there is only an answer.
That answer being balance.
Being hope.
Being despair.
We need both hope and despair in our lives.
Without either-
there would only be a world of stagnation-
unmoving and unchanging.
What a bore!
section iv.
writing example
(This will be done in the format of a self roleplay. Prompt: Northernkit can't seem to sleep- the hot air appears to irritate and pester him.)
Northernkit. He/him. 4 moons. Moonhigh.
I feel like my skin is boiling under my fur. He laid flat in his nest- rolled over on his back with his paws clutched tightly onto his chest- he could feel his heart starting to beast faster the longer he chose to sit here and endure the heat. Gah- he hated nights like this. Wait, no- hate is a very, very bad word. But hated was an understatement; and he couldn't think of a better word that wouldn't be so negative just yet- he could hardly think, the longer he sat awake. How can anyone be fine with sitting here? He hated the fact that even if it's time had come and went- the sun still held power over the world. It was not welcome in the night's domain and yet still, it raked it's claws into the dry dirt and persisted. Now- there was no saving grace of a cold night. If he couldn't sleep now- ah, just imagine how upset Sagesolace and Baylily would be! They'd tell him, “I told you not to sleep in,” or “Next time, don't drink water before you go to bed.” But it's none of those problems that caused this. But- ah, he didn't want to be a bother. He… certainly disliked the idea of disappointing his dads. Just imagine how sad they would be; maybe that could help pass the time. But how could he go back to sleep now? The damage had already been done- he was aware of the stickiness that surrounded him. Suffocating him. Forcing him to pass right back asleep. But he refused to submit to something that wasn't under his control; he refused to do something that wasn't his choice. This was why he hated the heat. It limited the potential of things that you could do in an average day- and it ruined everything! He didn't want to laze about in the sun and he didn't want to submit to its control.
This is stupid. A voice inside of him spoke loudly- his wordless frustrations gaining its sentience. Just go to sleep. How hard is it?
Very hard, actually- thank you for asking! And Northernkit could list every reason as to why. First, right now wasn't a good time to go back to sleep because there were many things wrong with the picture. Everything wasn't the way he needed it to be for him to sleep; the air was too dense, he was laying on the wrong side of his nest, he can't stand the sound of other kittens snoring and the moonlight was in his eyes and it was miserable and it was annoying and it was going to be impossible to sleep if all of things kept going-
Yeah, okay. Sure. Just keep making every excuse- I'm sure that will fix things, you big crybaby. ..Ugh. Maybe he was being a bit too much of a crybaby? Why was this such a big deal, anyways? Just because he couldn't sleep doesn't mean he couldn't just.. go back to sleep if he really tried, right? But- others would probably do it better than him! And if he wasn't the best then why did he bother? But you needed sleep to thrive and yet everything just wasn't- working out- …He just wished that he could stop himself from being so climatic. It's one night without sleep- what damage will that do in the long run? And if it does do damage; you can figure it out yourself. You have. You can't just keep clinging to your parents and expect them to help you. You're getting older. But they've made me dependent on their love.. how am I supposed to function when I need them to do everything for me?
And who's fault is that? He asked himself. He… knew the answer. But what good of a son would he be if he didn't let his parents conduct his childhood in the way they wanted? It was fine- he didn't need to speak up about how tiring it was to be engulfed in their love. They deserved that much from him. They do everything for him, and yet somehow, he still finds a way to be ungrateful for what he is given. And that even rings true now- as he sits here, staring blankly up in the sky; trying to look to himself for answers that he already knows. But he.. he needs to know if those answers are correct, right?.. He needs to know if he's making the right choice.
He's being ungrateful right now, isn't he? Oh dear. Yes, yes he definitely is. He has a nest under his head. He has shelter over him. He has a family who loves him. He needs to go back to bed. That's the end of it. he subconsciously felt his claws shift in his grasp- they slid out when he had gripped his chest tight. He sighed, looking at them; how their tips caught onto the glimmering moonlight that bothered him so. He didn't want to complain about everything- but it felt hard not too. It felt so.. difficult to just.. mhgh..
he didn't expand on the thought further.
Northernkit had enough. He forced himself to shut his eyes close and began to tense his muscles quickly- hoping that if he wore himself out; he'd pass out- just as the heat wanted him to. But he'd do it on his own terms.
.
.
(Hi there! Yes, you! If you found yourself entranced by this splendid piece of art and would like to engage in a- what is it called again? oh, yes, a joint roleplay; then please feel free to ask! I would be happy to roleplay with others- I will gladly take any chance I can to practice with Northernkit's roleplay style. Thank you very much- you're free to continue.)
conclusion
In this paragraph, I have hidden the tfcrp codewords.
So there's a few things that I would like to reiterate before I conclude this application (Yep- that's right- you're almost there! Congratulations! Almost crossed that red ribbon finish line!) First of all, Northernkit does not have BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder/Bipolar Personality Disorder); he does not react differently to certain situations. His emotional side will react first before he quickly stifles it up- the mask is just Northernkit effectively trying to make himself better- and separates his emotional, ‘wimpy’ nature from himself to animalize it- so that he doesn't have to listen to it further. It is not a separate personality- it is just the personification of traits that make him feel lesser and weak. Okay- that out of the way- seeing this litter come out is just such a great way to start fall, I was hooked on Northernkit from the moment the interest project was released- and I hope that this application proves just how locked in I was on his character. I had such a fun time working on this application- and I hope by now that you have come to enjoy it yourself.
Hopefully I don't start any big projects like this for a while- I feel like I would die. Although this didn't really feel like a big project. scary… Well! Thank you for reading, dear reader- I hope you enjoyed your time here while it lasted. I also wish the best of luck to any other person who applies for this litter- whether that be for Northernkit, Solsticekit, or Applekit. I know this litter is going to produce some amazing works of art- and I'll be keeping a close eye on any sort of application I find. (I love reading other applications- the differences in character ideas are truly my favorite part of applying.) That being said, it is time for us to depart. I hope you had a splendid time here.
Take care, and have a wonderful day! (Or night- er- orrr whatever! There's far too little time to list off each little thing. Bye-bye now!~)
end of section iv
credits:
application(forum) layout by @quilliamjuicing (@-quillow- ), feel free to use as long as proper credit is given to the layout creator (me, quills)
back to applicant's original litter application project: “ the means of justice in the court of the stars. ” a northernkit application
original litter project: ⋆ ˚。 A MATTER OF TIME ─⟢ open riverclan litter⋆ ˚。
(Don't ask me how I got this massive hunk of an application done so fast. It was an act that not even the spirits themselves could slow. It was like I was possessed- the more I typed the more I thought about what I could expand upon. I wrote this application like I was drafting my final letter in life and only had a day to do so (well, this took about three days- but the point still stands. This is probably 3x as long as my usual applications. God help us all.)
|| a northernkit application (tfcrp) ||
.
.
shoot, shoot, shoot! we forgot the cool subheader! (we did?) what a bad first impression! can’t you do anything right!? (i’m trying!-) Can’t you stop giving bland excuses for your incompetence?!
.
.
..okay whatever. let’s just.. start from the top.
“Souda! Kore kara da ze.”
dou kangaetemo watashi wa warukunai - kuroneko
a courtyard mauled by roses- thorns weaving and twisting beautiful, cracked pavement.
a gavel, held tightly by bloodied hands- the jury remains impartial.
a candle, it’s wick unlit and cold- it’s grand stature bent, and melted by time.
a deer, laid flat by fate- greeted by the sweet embrace of glorious light.
balance at its core. the imperfect and beautiful combined together;
true equality is meant to be ugly.
true justice is born from the ugliness of life.
Mindless rambling leads to incoherent and inconsistent ideas. I hope I portray the opposite.
Or maybe I’ll make no point at all.
Two ends of a productive spectrum- balanced on the line of how language and ideas are comprehended.
I don't intend to be memorable.
I don’t intend for this application to be memorable.
But if it sticks with you after you're done reading?
I'd say that maybe you don't need to be fancy to have a good application.
t.o.c.
section i. (intro)
a. about me
b. rp history
c. activity level // longevity
d. kit i’m applying for // why i want this kit
section ii. (personality + identity + delve)
a. future identity (sexuality, gender, etc.)
b. personality (simplified+detailed)
c. character traits/ideas
section iii. (trivia + dynamics + misc.)
a. trivia
b. family relationships/dynamics
c. misc.
section iv. (conclusion)
a. conclusion
Well, let’s get it started, shall we? I’m sure you’re waiting to be impressed.
As if truthful positivity was used at all in language.
Words don’t tend to match emotions, haven’t you heard?
..No, I’m sure you haven’t.
We, as individuals who seek belonging, aren’t often honest with each other.
A common fear of rejection binds us in a life of lies.
So we choose not to address what painfully obvious issues that hide within us.
Honesty is a privilege, not a necessity.
(As an experiment, everything written in this application is written in the same tone that my version of Northernkit would use. If my dialogue seems informal, rude or even a bit silly- that's the tone of Northernkit's character!)
section i.
Meet the user; @quilliamjuicing !
Yo, what's good? The user's @quilliamjuicing - college degenerate and scholarly moron here; who's gender and pronouns are fluid like that of the sea. Just call me whatever, I don’t even care.
What, you want me to say more?
I doubt anyone would really care about nonsense ramblings like mine, but if you insist- I'll talk about me if you just give me some time to think.
You certainly must have taken the long way around if you find yourself here scrounging about on my application; I hardly advertise myself to the public roleplaying community when it comes to these little things, so if you found me- I don't know what you're doing here, truthfully. I wish I could say anything more than that- but there isn't much to say. I don't know.. you want a lollipop for your good work? For just clicking a few buttons and jumping on a forum that you probably have little to no business doing here? I'm not saying like I shame you- and of course, we've all been there. Exploration is a natural craving; the same as wanting to play video games after a long day of work.
Well, I honestly applaud that kind of behavior. You're like me; finding any sort of reason to get out of work and just simmer down a bit. You want a break. You want to have fun! So if you're looking for such a thing, then I assure you with great certainty that you have found what you sought out. I'm nothing but fun. Sure, finding my little hidey-hole is a bit of a foolish, but almost admirable sort of accomplishment. And hey- you know how we learn something new every day? Well, how about you learn about me! Sure sure, you might be someone who's heard of me before- or at least recognizes me from a different time; a different climate. for those who remember me- welcome back. For those who don't, let me give you a refresher. I'm kinda what I like to refer to myself as a “washed up Scratch celebrity.” I once was one of those bigshot creators with a dorky little comic and a dream- a dream that I would be famous someday and be placed among the greats. I spent years breaking my back on a story that I grew to despise- work that would mean nothing the moment I stopped posting. Fame moves too fast; and it was never going to be my style. And yet I tried so hard, determined to prove myself to a bunch of eight year old children! Wow, what a life! Wow, little Quilliam must have had true hopes of her famer being worth something back then! But then I had a realization that truly altered my focus of artistic talent; why does fame even matter?
Short answer- it doesn't! I didn't have to be dependent on wanting followers or wanting to have a popular comic- I could simply just dig a hole to bury myself in and leave behind a comic that was essentially, clipping my wings and taking away from my full, wonderful potential! So I took a shovel and laid my old name to rest. No more @-Quillow-, it was nice knowing you! Once that account was done and out- I now find myself paroling here; the @quilliamjuicing account. It's not much, but it's far nicer than what fame offered. For once, it's quiet. I can respond to everything before the end of the week for once. When I can hear myself think for once- every thing I used to find important is completely and utterly useless! And now, I can enjoy the things that I want to put my time into. Sure, I'm still a person who's got interests like Beetlejuice, Danganronpa, Jujutsu Kaisen, Smiling Friends and Chiikawa- but I hope by now I can escape that fame that only labeled me as the “Creator of Willow Walkers.” I want to be more. I want to be an artist- who isn't just seen as a representation of a lame, confusing comic.
roleplaying experience;
Man, I think I’ve been doing this “roleplaying thing” for far too long; you’d think it would be something that I would be able to grow out of at one point- but I guess it just clings to you. My characters grow with me- yet I don’t know if that’s a good thing or if it’s completely and utterly pathetic to say. Doesn’t matter, I’ll say it anyways. I’m not afraid to be childish. I’ve been that way from the start of my Scratch journey. And what happens with the passage of time no matter who you do; things change. Violently fast. For example- I started roleplaying in minuscule, short-lived roleplays that hardly lasted more than a year- beginning in 2020 and finding its end in 2021. I had four characters from two separate roleplays; Sleekmoon, Foxtrot, Copperflick and Pebblerun. Crazy to think that what seemed so important is hardly a thought in my mind nowadays- as if there’s a chance that I bother to remember them at all. But that’s the fun in roleplaying! Everything changes, so you’ve got plenty more chances to evolve, and try again- move outside your comfort zone and try to create something truly memorable. So I tried. And failed- miserably- when I first joined tfcrp with a rather basic and plan character; killed because of a lack of care for the environment that the roleplay at the time supported. But then the community got better- and so did my writing. At least for a little while. No journey is without its losses; and the moment I returned back to the roleplay in 2022 with Shorepaw, I broke my arm and lost any sort of motivation I had for the character. But when my arm healed- so did my motivation. I finally got my grasp on things with Balladerstwhile- and although I questioned what on earth an erstwhile was- I finally had a character that I gave meaning to. Someone who really showed me what tfcrp was capable of. What creativity lied within the community; how I could grow my ideas based on what I had seen around me. Truthfully, it wasn’t my characters that made me stay. It was the people behind those characters. And then when ballad was said and done, I returned with possibly, my magnum opus. Evedaisy. A name that inspired many when it came to joining the roleplay- my guilty favorite and I loved him dearly. I then had Solacespindle, who didn’t last nearly as long- but she had the most depth out of all of my lovely characters. I could rattle on and on about the characters I’ve had and the ones I enjoyed writing about the most; but frankly I don’t think you would care, so why should I? All that really matters is the characters I have now. Marmotbane. She has been around since February- and I certainly don’t plan on leaving her story anytime soon. And right behind her is Coltishkit- my son who… may or may not exist (we’ll see, it just may take some time (or so I hope))- but he’s been a part of my life since.. September of last year. (Oh god, has this poor guy been waiting to exist for a year? Good grief.) No matter what- I try to give my characters lives that feel real; that they aren’t just tossed because I feel like it. I want to give each of them a purpose; something that makes them feel alive.
Characters that aren’t just there for me to claim; they deserve to have a claim in my life as well.
activity levels // longevity
See, I don’t like to label my time, nor my availability by numbers anymore. It used to be way easier being confined in that little box you live in until you graduate high school- and then suddenly- pop! You don’t have a clue of how often you’ll be free to stick around. But by all means, I’m not just going to abandon scratch- never have. I’m quite adamant on making sure that my characters are frequently present in their plots- and as I slowly begin to process my way through college, I’m sure I’ll have an easier time being able to find my free time and availability. But for now, if you wanted an estimate? I’m probably active 80% of the time- I check Scratch at least once a day (at least on this account- the others are all basically inactive at this moment), and I always try to find time to start threads frequently.
But outside of Scratch, my activity is far more fluid. I’m online very, very frequently when it comes to just basic things in my life. It’s required to be online nowadays- tree murdering is becoming an art of the past. So if I can’t find time to roleplay one week; know that in place of that missing time, I’ll fill it with my ramblings about said characters- when I get a chance to have a roleplay character; I frequently think about them- even if they appear inactive or unused. Marmotbane is an example of this. She hasn’t had any threads in about a month- and that is simply because I am currently figuring out where I want her arc to go. None of my characters remain stagnant in their lives- just in real life, they change. And that’s the best part of role playing to me. To create something unique, something new. Putting countless hours into a fictional little cat; while it’s slightly embarrassing to admit- why should I care? It doesn’t matter what people think of me! I’m perfectly fine with embracing cringe. And if I have to embrace cringe to give this kit the life that he would deserve; then of course I’d do it a thousand times over. After all, that’s dedication. “Toughing it out” through thick and thin as if you’re trying to prove a point.
And the point I’m trying to prove? That I wouldn’t let Northernkit’s life go to waste. I don’t often let them go so fast, anyways. Marmotbane already sealed her fate, and so has Coltishkit- even if he has yet to breathe life into this roleplay. I have promised both a life of love and freedom, a long life. If I were to receive this special kitten; you can rest assured that I would strive to have him live far longer than the bare minimum- I can assume perhaps 75-80+ as a rough estimate. But I even doubt the security of such a statement- because this version of Northernkit- my ultimatum to beginning this application- has a far more powerful reasoning to my tentative decision to attempt applying for such a splendid creature.
kit i'm applying for // why i want this kit/why i should have this kit
Before we get into the specifics as to why I’m applying for this kitten, it would probably do me well if I restated who I am applying for, in case you haven’t gotten the memo yet. I am officially applying for Northernkit of Riverclan; or as I may refer to him as, Riverclan’s embodiment of justice itself. Obviously, we can get into the details about said title later- it’s unimportant to you, the audience, for now. What I’m sure you’re dying to hear is my grand aforementioned reason for the application- and how my spectacle- is more deserving of the other applications before me.
But first, I want to address something. I’ve always thought of this question as selfish. Perhaps in its own way- it sheds a person in a negative light. When I am supposed to elaborate upon myself and why I am more deserving than others; it reminds me of a certain writing, one by Joan Didion. She describes writing as, “an aggressive, and even hostile act,” something that personally attacks the readers by forcing them to see things in your perception. Now I ask of you, dear reader- I dare you- to consider my words. What I say now is from the selfish mind of myself- why I am deserving. So see it from my eyes. Not yours. Understand why I am more deserving than you. This is a testament to my commitment.
I wish to obtain Northernkit because not only am I well versed in the art of storytelling and roleplay- taking up well over 1/3 of my life, with countless hours poured into making the hearts of fictional beings beat just the same as living entities- but I simply enjoy the art of being able to mold a character into a new brilliant idea; my ideas being one of those that I always try to expand on. There is always a why- there is an always an if that I can have my characters answer. They act as individuals- not as a canvas for me to paint. Yet that being said, my time on Scratch is vintage- I find myself teetering on the end of my inevitable departure from a site full of nostalgia; and perhaps it’s only the drive to find that nostalgia in writing that’s kept me here. But I no longer want to stay. At least, not without a grand finale. Yes, dear reader, I am proposing a simple yet provoking response to the question; I should have Northernkit because I intend for him to be my last tfcrp character. I wish to take flight from a site that has held my hand tight as I ventured out into the vast world of adolescence. I have no need for a guiding hand anymore. But if I am to leave, I want to end it off with a bang; a character to symbolize everything I stand for, and stand against. A character who can invoke questioning. A character who brings unique meaning into my life. The final chapter of Scratch; left in the paws of someone who can I enjoy knowing that they will be the last (and even if Coltishkit is born after Northernkit- it doesn’t change my sentiment. He’s been here far longer than Northernkit. If I were to have Northernkit- he would be my last application on any Scratch roleplay. Ever. I have no need to bring back old desires or try to wedge myself into communities that I do not belong in; I want to end this part of my life with the roleplay that truly started it.)
So to summarize; not only would my experience with roleplaying enhance the experience I could truly provide for the character, and that I would constantly feed my time and attention into him just the same as my other characters, but he would also be my final gift to tfcrp; the last of a linage of characters who have floated and danced around my head. Yes, it’s fairly sappy- but it has meaning. Do you think anyone else applying for him would go so far as to state that they would conclude their journey with a kit that hardly resembles anything more than a concept? That is the risk I’m willing to take. I’ve attached myself to the idea of him. And if I don’t receive him? It doesn’t matter much to me. I know that by this point, I am particularly selective to design and potential. I doubt I’d have this sort of energy or excitement towards a kit application for a while. And that’s alright. I’ll know when it’s my time to take my leave regardless.
But my Northernkit? He’d be my love poem to Scratch journey as a whole. And that is why I think I should win.
end of section i
section ii.
THE COMPASS OF THE BODY
NORTH- SOUL // EAST - PURPOSE // SOUTH - MORALS // WEST - BELIEFS
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All experiences can be determined in result by the soul- our id, the primitive functions inside of our bodies from the moment we step forward into this world.
A quiet part of us that lies dormant in abandoned instinct the further we try to differentiate ourselves from each other. but in the end, our bodies all become one.
Our purpose is our ego, our logic that we believe makes things true. what makes the best answer. As if life was only a multiple-choice test.
Then we see ourselves as a higher power of reason- as if we are better from others because we see right from wrong. The pull of superego, our evidence that we stand above all. But if all stand above each other- why does superego matter? We are still at eye level.
From our psyche comes creation of our own ways- how each individual sees the world- our beliefs- what we believe is correct. How their experiences shape them- how they learn to love- and love to hate.
Four directions of a compass that we believe will point us the right way.
But the compass is broken.
You can never rely on yourself for any reason.
We, as beings, use any excuse to lie.
And that is simply the cruel reality of our bodies.
Shells to hide our true selves- because we always something want more in life.
What greedy, selfish little things we are.
So what is a soul?
In it's basic elements; it is an empty vessel that is then filled with memories from a family tree,
and from those memories- comes personality; distinct to every family tree.
inherited love.
no matter how much you hide it away,
the soul will always be a part of you.
It is the way you were designed to act.
Your intentional behavior- no matter how much you deny it.
It's your truth.
The truth that you murder,
as we believe belonging is something that is earned.
THE SOULThe soul is built out of:
- identity (wings)
- personality (design)
Your wings.
Wings is certainly a dull thing to call what is essentially your freedom- but it sounds much nicer than referring to it as something that, will be nothing more than a concept. Earned through experience- and the only change that is completely your own. Contrary to popular belief, your wings are something that are not influenced by popularity or culture; it is your experience. Who you want to be. Some can choose to deny it- but Northernkit would gladly show his. Identity and love are things that are personal, and no one has the right to take your love away from you. Love yourself, not others. That's the way everyone wants to think- so why not embrace that truth?
for Northernkit's identity, he would care not to establish who he'd like to romance in a particularly fond manner. Nor would he care about presenting himself as anything definite. Gender is something of significantly less importance to him. And from his perspective, love is also stupid and obsolete. A grand way of escaping your true purpose by feeding into another scheme. It's despicable, wanting to love someone else; it's shameful. He'd rather not have any part in it.
Northernkit will identify as aromantic from an early age- but that doesn't mean he will completely avoid romance.
Yes, although our young charming star cares not romance- he would commit the cardinal sin of engaging in it if he truly had something to gain; from any individual, from any spouse. It come be a heightened sense of self. Finding belonging. Or even a newfound feeling of control and power. But it has to be with someone who understands him.
Not every cat is deserving to know precious secrets. Love at first sight? A statement of hogwash. That is infatuation; a sickly, tricky feeling. If you love someone- it must be earned. You must earn Northernkit's trust- whether that be a she-cat, tom, or any other being. He doesn't care who it is- he just hopes they understand the requirements for loving him- or he won't love you back.
To reiterate; Northernkit would be a pan demisexual aromantic. He would possibly be partial to genderfluidity; but he most likely wouldn't care enough to actually engage with his gender.
“Just call me whatever.” is his honest response.
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Your design.
The heart of your character; who you are intended to be from birth, based entirely off of what you are given from your family. Your personality is not something that is created by you based off of new experience that allows you to grow, that's silly. We are not designed for spontaneous survival. Instinctual reflexes are just the same as personality- our design. And our design's sole purpose is to help us live; made from each of the three factors- benefactors, beneficiaries, and malefactors. This is given to us from the start- we just have to grow in life to truly discover each part of it.
Which is why it is often we tend to dislike who we are.
That's why masks were created, don't you know?
THE BENEFACTORS“Those who earn.”
The hardest workers in our mind; always present in how we act around others- seeking to make a good impression. The gentle and kind parts of the soul- ones we prefer to reference as positive or good when stripped down to the bare definitions. But no trait is without conflict; there is no good without evil and there is no evil without good- are bodies are designed to be balanced at every turn. Alas, we like the way the word ‘good’ sounds- almost as if it’s a compliment to our character. What is good is what is right- and we always want to see ourselves as in the right.
So, what is the good in Northernkit?
First comes the art of compassion. Being kind is a talent, especially in such a dark world. Putting others before yourself is a mannerism that Northernkit has taken quite a liking to. It gives him an excuse to pour his time into the lives of others- adding significant value to his purpose when it is blended with ideals that can, overall, make a life better. Make life worth living. Showing kindness is like extending a paw to someone in a time of distress- showing that somewhere, someone sees you; even if they don't care. Sure, his kindness isn't given because it comes from the goodness of his heart- but at least the kindness stems from a place of reason. Without reason- kindness seems forced, anyways. But kindness is not just the art of empathy; it is truthfully, the ability to take the attention- and information- that lies under the body. The nicer you are to someone- the more likely you are to get closer to them. They'll want you. They'll deserve you if they devout their trust to you- show they care by coming back to you again and again.
Compassion is the foundation of friendships. Compassion is the foundation of relationships. Of trust. Th more trust he earns- the more likely he is to get them to understand, and see things his way. Understand what needs to be at play for him to fulfill his purpose- his goals. But with that kindness comes an additional factor- the ability to smooth over his true intentions by being densely responsive to any sort of negativity- a suffocating kind of sweetness is ever-present in his voice. Too sweet to be true, it seems.
His words are often laced with gentle lies- so they hide behind a blanket of compliments and remarks that would usually make one smitten to his ‘wholesome’ and ‘friendly’ comments- a poet; who treats his words with great value. “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me?” That was the saying, wasn't it? Well- once again- words have far more significance than what one would think. Words can be discouraging. Words can be weapons- not daggers, but ropes. Ropes that tie around someone's neck until it becomes their leash- that someone else holds. then they have no choice but to obey. But if your ropes are not hidden under cloth- subtly becomes a thing of the past. To be effective in your words- you must be able to risk harm; but disguise it. Sweetness makes you feel vulnerable- friendly. He understands vaguely that others tend to treat you better if you treat them the same way you would treat yourself- but he doesn't..ah, well..treat himself kindly, per say…
..Where were we? Something something- using sweetness as a method to pull those closer and hide his bitter truths within flat, fattened and sugary phrases that make him seem gentle and caring- which then leads us into his overall charismatic demeanor. He has but a simple and unassuming charm too him- not trying to impress to tightly, nor trying to appear as bigger than himself. And speaking of which- this leads into his persuasiveness itself- how words are used as tools to convince others that he will always be deserving of being in the right- and why his purpose and his beliefs are something that everyone should see the same as his. It's a blunt and a bit of a dense display- but that's exactly the point. apparently, to get anyone to understand anything; it must be said in its key elements- it's base factors. You can't give logical reasoning because, for some stupid reason, our emotions tend to outweigh our logic. So if you put it as flat and objectively as you can- by making them see the clear side just by entangling words with truths and lies to the point where they can't feel around for a correct answer- it becomes easier to convinces others to trust you. To understand you. All it takes to understand Northernkit is just by seeing his reasoning. And by seeing everything the same as he does- they walk one step closer to finding and achieving true hope. But, when it comes down to it, he simply just tries to maintain a put-together, confident persona that tries to resolve issues in a civil manner. This charisma is the starting point for the building of the mask, a secondary character which extends Northernkit further- a character that he portrays in every action- a new shell that he later grows into. But in order to be an actor, it is necessary to go along with the stage. His charisma helps with that- being able to move with ease; keeping a pleasant, friendly smile on his face; being receptive to others and responding in a relaxed tone.
But having a charismatic appeal means nothing if you cannot restrain yourself from putting yourself above others. Obviously, being humble is not just about accepting praise with grace- it is a precautionary measure of measuring your patience and your respect for others. Discouragement is a battle cats face often. If you accept praise with haste and with eagerness; you take away the chances that another may be able to receive that same praise. And, while we mention it- praise is useless to begin with! Encouragement from others has no place in this world- especially if our key drive is to focus on ourselves for no reason. It leads to an imbalance- too much praise for others increases feelings of hatred and madness; and then others feel like they have to work harder for something that the other had no credit to give. But at least by being humble, you start looking less desperate- something to plug the hole of your growing incompetence that boils within.
But of course, what god can a friend be if they can't digest fun in a healthy and flamboyant manner? That's what his vivacious side is supposed to represent- unrepressed freedom pulled together by the joy he finds in making special connections with others. Without joy- the world feels one dimensional and flat. Good must be seen in everything; even if it bothers or annoys you or unsettles you; life is something to appreciate. And you can only experience it once (as Northernkit certainly doesn't believe in reincarnation through other means of life- this is it. This is your one chance to try and be apart of something truly brilliant.) He carries himself with pride, and always seems to sport a lively and spirited bounce in his step. From a bland viewpoint- he seems unbreakable in spirit and in mind.
For the most part, we tend to carry the good parts of yourself around with a smile- both seen when you are truthful, and when you lie to others as a mean to fit in with new company. The good parts are what everyone wants to see out of you- the benefactors earn you what you are seeking. So regardless is Northernkit acts one with the stage or if he chooses to quietly embrace the side of himself that he hates (does that sound anything like how I'm supposed to act?? (I'm sorry..))hides, the benefactors remain active in all parts of his routine, and often outshine the other areas of his majestic and dreamy role.
+ compassionate, sweet, captivating, charismatic, humble, vivacious, persuasive.
THE BENEFICIARIES“Those who receive.”
Our mannerisms that are benefitted by the positive and open ones that overall, control how we behave around others. these are the neutral-the outspoken that lie dormant in everyday life. They act systematically and without much application of logic or focus; they are really what comes after instinct- how our instinct is calibrated into our bodies- through controlled methods of sending and receiving patterns. While none of these are excessively negative or hurtful, they tend to influence set ‘codes’ in our minds- ones that tell or to ‘fight or flight’ or ‘rest and digest.’
For Northernkit, each of his decisions is conducted immediately by unflawed and direct commands coming from his cerebral intellect before emotional values flood his senses. What comes first in this kit's mind is the logical appeal- what is the best way of resolving a problem; and what would appease his firm moral code? By catering to his inner ego more often than not- this may make his decisions seem heartless or uncaring. And it's understandable where those epiphanies may come from because of how quick he'll be to act on what he has determined on right. But in reality, it is quite the opposite. He seeks to find the answer that would benefit the greater sample of the population. The choice that would give greater justice to those who would need it. He doesn't tend to get caught on his emotions nor think about the negatives of a choice that would harm a smaller grouping of individuals if he chose a result with greater positivity- he must act in the moment before it is too late. However, he always tries to make it clear that no matter how he may act in the spur of the moment, he never means to be hurtful in his actions- not in a way where he would want anyone to suffer greatly. He wants to make sure that everything he does that harms someone is not because he wants to- but it's just a part of his purpose. He needs to hurt others if he wants to make them see the best out of the world. So, Northernkit tries his hardest to appears unaggressive and soft. Yes, he knows that he is still malicious and scheming from a certain standpoint- but he doesn't go out of his way to harm others in violent manners. That takes away from someone's joy they find in the earth- a key factor to Northernkit's purpose; and part of that being to make everyone see the hope that dwells silently below.
He's sometimes even slightly more feminine in his actions- taking a more dainty approach to his use of vocabulary- an effeminate character that while may not express true female-aligning identity; steers away from typical masculine behaviors; such as courage and bravery. Northernkit in the end, only cares about being seen as a friend- not a weapon. If you sharpen yourself for the art of battle; your words lose meaning- and you are seen as only as a weapon because that is what you made your kills become. By trying to accustom yourself to polite and delicate manners; you strengthen your mind for other goals- such as friendship. Friendship is a rather sad term for it however- he has no intent to be ‘friends’ with anyone- or that means that he would have to be open to cats. And if there's anything that he would refuse faster than the speed of light- it would be to hold his bare emotions up for others to mangle and destroy. Northernkit is a delicate flower who must preserve his emotions- he doesn't want to be hurt. He doesn't want others to know his issues or he would suddenly have to rely on someone else to keep his secrets- to be dependent on them for his own survival. It must be the other way around. It has to be that way. Or his mask exists for no reason at all. And how sad would that be? ..how utterly dumb and pathetic.. No. He must exist with the intent to make others understand. To make him be their saving grace.
So he holds every cat he knows- whether that be family, friend, fiend or foe alike- tightly on their own leashes. He restricts the freedom of others by being crushingly present in their lives; seeming to be there always in anyone's time of need- a convenient shoulder to lean on. But by Northernkit offering his own precious efforts at providing solidarity- they owe something to him. Their mind. Their bodies. He will protect them and make them understand his point of view for their own good- paternalistic behaviors becoming difficult to weave away from the longer you know the supposed wonderful and beautifully put together tom. Befriending Northernkit is a thing to do with cautious; not in the manner that he is dangerous- but in the manner that he would do anything for you to keep you safe and under his looking glass- by any means possible.
It's a suffocating kind of love. Oh, he loves everyone he knows so dearly. Every cat is special and he wishes to make that clear to any new cat he may come across. Each cat is unique, despite what they may say about history repeating. Each cat is beautiful regardless of their crimes or their ‘sins-’ by no individual being alike, there is far more to appreciate about them. And he fears that no cat can understand that beauty because everyone is so caught up or being perfect- or achieving their greater destinies.
If his siblings start to explore to places he can't reach- his efforts to change the world would be for naught. So with all of his heart, he protects by making them know that he will never let anyone go without him. He can do everything for them. Create a space where they can belong while at the same time- enforcing his ideals and creative standards to make them the best cats they can be.
Because no matter how great they may feel about themselves; there is always a way to take another step forward towards true justice.
But Northernkit feels deeply misunderstood deep down because of one singular fact; that his ideas go unrepresented in their time- obsolete because he tends to steer away from the idea of the dead guiding them from above in a place called Starclan. Or to go even further, his purpose is something completely defiant against the logic of their own law. No one understands the world like him. It is his iconoclastic followings that make him feel isolated; the first issue that made him create his mask. He doesn't want to believe in anything that he cannot confirm; nor does he care much about Starclan to begin with. Letting the dead control your life is overrated- and is a mere excuse for staying in a straight, centered line. And I know, said ideals such as purpose have been teased for far too long as you read through this application. And I promise you, you'll get there in time. But first, it's key to understand what traits Northernkit loves- and what parts he hates. Why and how. Ask the question loudly in your mind;
What burdens Northernkit so greatly that he molds it into his life's work?
these aspects tend to act in automation; the default settings of Northernkit's character. How he wants to be seen in the eyes of others. While it is not prioritized as often as the benefactors- the efforts of benefactors can help concentrate the effectiveness of the beneficiaries.
= cerebral (in terms of his logic), unaggressive, iconoclastic, effeminate, paternalistic.
THE MALEFACTORS“Those who take.”
When I refer to any living thing as selfish, do know that I say it with no ill intent. It is in our nature to be greedy. Cruel and even hurtful, in some manners. Nature is not forgiving- so we do not intend to be weak or dull. An animal without the drive to survive is hardly an animal at all. By definition, we all must be cruel to survive. That is how we identify threats- how we weed through lies to see the mangled truth that we try to avoid. And although it may hurt to admit, deep down, we know we are nothing without our negatives. If everyone acted the same- acted without our ‘fight or flight’ side to ourselves- just imagine how stagnant and lame our lives would be! Everyone would act for themselves- there would be no point in making friends, making enemies. It would just be us, us and our thoughts. And everyone knows that our thoughts tend to be deceiving. There’d be no point- no purpose- to our lives. Why would anyone want that? It’s better to embrace our anger- our selfishness. Even if you hate it so. It's a part of you. Begrudgingly.
In order for his efforts to be convincing to truly be effective- he must impose complete and utter control over the others. To step forward with such a command in his eyes that screams the words, "Look at me and understand that I am the only one who can possibly understand you. That I alone am the only one who can help you." Persuasiveness cannot work if you do not directly affirm your own ideas- and you can't be gentle with your words if you want you voice to come out any louder than a whisper. Northernkit is keen to assert himself when it's needed- he doesn't hold back on being assertive if it makes someone want to listen to him more. He will take control of a conversation just to get a point across- or to turn his tongue to discourage others from forming any arguments against him. Arguments are more than arguments to him; they are tests of his faith in what he believes in. And if he doesn't ‘win’ every conversation he engages in- he has failed at showing that he has faith in himself. And to be a leader- to wear the mask he prizes so greatly- he cannot lose. A leader who loses his fights is someone that can easily be shamed and looked down upon by others- and then in a flash- you are nothing but irrelevant, and your efforts would have been for naught. He cannot become irrelevant. He will not be suffocated under doubts. He will remain in control through thick and thin- something that contributes to his tendency to be possessive when it comes to those who he cares about. (Which is, in retrospective, any cat he will have met throughout his time living.)
Northernkit is also too cautious when it comes to being truthful; he can never be honest with someone until he knows that they are devoted to him- that they want to be a part of his life to the point where if he told them to jump off of a cliff- he would hear bones crack. His caution is an instinctive urge to protect himself- to always observe before acting- then acting on what he observes quickly and efficiently. Sure, it makes him look bitter and mistrusting (which he is to certain degree), but he’s only doing so because he doesn’t want anyone to get to close to him. He lets his negatives be an open part of him- or at least the ones that would benefit him in any manner. He doesn't hide the parts of himself that make him stronger- he embraces them with love.
Northernkit doesn't like the idea of sharing his tender relationships with other cats; if he meets a cat who truly means a lot to him- they must be his and his alone. He would be all they would need- he would be a shield, a defender for them in their times of need- as long as he was the only one that mattered to them. The concept of friends is a stupid premise. Why risk having several when you can have a singular ‘friend’ who would only treat you with respect and love you and share his visions with you? Wouldn't that matter more than fickle things that would struggle to find uplifting moments because others probably have high priorities that would be above your safety? Your comfort? No. He needs you. And you need him. he'd make you understand through words- you'd make you understand by holding you close regardless of what you want. The voiceless can stay voiceless; and Northernkit can speak for the both of you- even if it isn't what you want, it's what he wants. And everything he wants is for the betterment of the clan- not for himself. So know that he'd never use his voice to damage you. It would help- just letting him take your words. Wouldn't that be nice? To be free from responsibility and leave it in the paws of someone else? That's why he cares so much for you. So you indulge in a life of love and sloth if you take his hand- stay with him- and follow his lead. Doesn't that sound nice? What part about that could possibly be bad? why is wanting to protect someone to help them seen as such a bad thing? I don't understand!
Northernkit is keen to use his voice often; and it's a guilty pleasure of his to sustain his loquacious manners. Talking is one of favorite things to do- you need a voice to make language comprehensive and fluid. He needs to be sure that his goal can be interpreted in the finest details- that it cannot be rivaled by opposing logic because it is the truth. And he tends to use his rantings as a way to drown out the thoughts of the other party participating in a conversation: as they say, “all eyes on me!” He surrounds his lies- his imperfections- with mindless chatter as a way to distract from the words that he twists; which can easily be seen through if someone were to examine what he says- following the cracks in his words that may lead to his own downfall. He is also- as any cat should be- full of himself. As it’s been brought up before; part of that selfishness is pride in ourselves, because once long ago- that was all we had to count on. You had to make yourself feel good somehow. Although it doesn’t go to an outwardly bragging extends, he’s taught himself that deep down, he is better than the rest of any clan because he has already discovered what he needs to do in his life- he has a direct connection between his actions and his purpose. He doesn’t have to idly stand by and discover himself when he already knows what he’s supposed to be. A guide. A Saint, in some cases. And he’d be more than willing but to argue and disagree with any idea that would stand against that fact- leaning very disputatious when it comes to how he handles controversy and being challenged- he loves being rivaled. He enjoys being able to exhibit his purpose in action; he loves being clear in his logic and forcing others to have no choice but to listen to his words if they want a chance at engaging in an argument fed by strong moral premises. He enjoys telling people they are wrong. He enjoys twisting the perception of what is good and what is bad- because to him, there is no divider between the two when both sides contribute to the same, greater project. Everything will fall into the same set of balance by the end; life and death, sun and moon- halves to a whole that make a complete and balanced circle; every thing finding its justice. Agreeing with others doesn’t have to be a part of the balance- there must be someone to go against the tide to ensure that everything is balanced. Northernkit is that someone. It brings him more joy than anything else- not communication, not exploration; but simply being able to indulge himself in pleasures that sustain him and him alone. It’s his hedonistic mannerisms that not only feed into his self confidence more and more- but by also keeping beings close to him and make them love him; he can easily engage in self-indulgence. His pleasure comes from making others believe in him- fueled by the love of others that makes him feel whole.
..And then, there is a deep weakness that dwells inside of him- one he wishes that he could be rid of; but there's no getting rid of who you are. This is the main factor as to why the mask was created- he hates pitying others- and he hates how emotional he'll become over the most frivolous things. Everything seems so wasted when he takes a deep look as the workings of the world. How he only sees a crater of where life used to thrive. How when cats grow- they forget what made life fun; what made it enjoyable. He weeps for each youthful memory lost. Crying for all the hopes of a better world lost when someone simply states that they have to “grow up.” The world has sustained far too much loss. Too much misery. An imbalance of despair- that he can never fix, no matter how much he reaches out to grab it. His weeping self is the embodiment of doubt and regret itself- wondering if their truly is any purpose to life; if he exists for no reason- meaning that there is no reasoning to strive for love and excitement? if he can't change a thing about the world- and life truly spins in a cycle- what's the point of.. anything?
So he cries. And he feels more pain than anyone else; because even if he suppresses deeply within- drowning his sadness and misery under a mask which only reflects the opposite- he still feels that he will always be.. lesser. He will never find his worth. And it doesn't help when he sees just how much hurt others withstand in their own lives. No one deserves to feel alone- so why were our bodies designed only for ourselves?
His deep emotional understanding causes him to often be far too ready to speak of his fears; something that he resents and deeply dreads. No one can know that he is weak. No one can know that he cries and wails over problems that only he can see- problems that they could care less to understand.
The mask is created purely to silence his emotional depth. To convince himself, somehow; that he has found true purpose in his life.
The malefactor functions in a less autonomous manner than the benefactors and as a result, are more present in waking thought than active speech and action. The malefactors are there in case of an “emergency,” where other methods need to be used in order to keep dominance wherever Northernkit may stand. That doesn't mean that he ignores what is seen as bad and harmful by others- he always tries to train the parts of his malefactors; to be ready to use them at will. Northernkit will never be afraid to be insidious- inside and out.
- assertive, hedonistic, loquacious, disputatious, cautious, emotional, possessive.
Now, purpose is less controlled.
Purpose is what defines your character.
The soul shapes your purpose;
and purpose itself executes it.
Your reason for your grand existence.
No being goes without purpose,
or so Northernkit believes.
Most purposes go undefined-
but he has found a way to describe it in its bare elements.
A way to make everyone understand him.
PURPOSEPurpose is built out of:
- Worldview
- Dissection of personality
What does Northern believe he was meant to live for? That is the question that essentially builds purpose- is it the goal that you seek to put above any other objective in life; it is the reason you find yourself walking amongst the other beings in this world. Most don't intend to follow their purpose- or perhaps the concept of purpose is not something that can be found; yet Northernkit believes he has discovered his- his invisible string that drags him forward.
Worldview.
The world is a complex set of organisms which all live within their set ecosystems and boundaries; everything is supposed to work together- in harmony. that is the way the world was designed; animals were meant to stand animals- prey and predator who fulfilled basic lives; no high level of consciousness is there to guide them nor correct their mannerisms. These complex organisms become simple figments of thought when everything else is taken away from the picture and you observe their reason for living; to feed or to be fed to others. The world is- well, was- simple and easy to follow. No one had anything that heightened their complex- that magically made them organize creations beyond that of what was intended. Clan cats began to separate themselves from their animal selves- to heighten themselves and supposedly create order by creating borders and territories- to force a divide between them. But it didn't help separate their urges. If anything- it created restriction. It created greed, wrath. dictators. And their law that was supposed to protect that peace failed- all these rules hurt families and created chaos; families split apart or forced to adhere to clan law just because they were told to. the clans grew bigger- their influence spread as the traveled the earth. Clan life became the only way to live- a marvel of creation to those who witnessed it from afar. And Northernkit has no grudges or tallies against clan cats of course- he just wishes it would change. Because those glasses that promise a perfect world are rose-tinted- just like everything else. Nothing can be perfect.
The code allows us to reject the suffering of other cats. It allowed us to shun those who couldn't get with the program. Those who were codebreakers did not belong in a clan- and they were fiercely rejected. In what way is that freedom? In what way is that peace?
No. clan life became the source of despair.
Hurt and pain that went unnoticed because the rest of clan life seemed alright and fair- but clan life is limited. From a young age, Northernkit questions why he can't be in love with someone from another clan. Or why a few cats hold so much power in a limited range; these clan leaders- their word is law. Why? How is that peace? If a power-hungry cat is elected- they could take and no one could speak out against them. If a leader tells their cats to fight for their honor at any cost- they listen; they want their place in their clan- a position that they believe is something that must be earned.
It imbalances the scale- it allows fear and despair to run rampant to keep their clans under control.
And that is what Northernkit must fight against.
Despite the raging cruelty that surrounds the clans- they pay no mind to it. All this madness- no one pays any mind to it. They are fine to let a handful cats suffer if it grands them a calm state of mind. If the peace is kept, why do they care about those who cannot live the lives they want to? Northernkit must make them see the despair. To see how unfair clan life really is. Because that is what the voiceless deserves- to let everyone see the hate that festers in the world. By manifesting that hate- becoming a target of rage and anger against how this machine functions- they can come together to see how unfair it is. To fight for hope- to fight for a brighter dawn. Helping everyone enforce the art of balance in their lives so no cat's pain goes unheard. If the clans were a method to bring cats together- then he will make it possible without having to hold all the power in his paws. To be equal- each voice needs to be heard. He will speak for the voiceless. He will be the star that the world needs. He will act as whatever they need.
He must make each each feel great pain to want to fight for love- to rise above the fear and despair.
But he needs to be a leader to make it happen. That's why he creates his mask; a better version of himself that suppresses his worst qualities as to inspire hope to the best of his ability.
Dissection of personality.
His purpose is to speak out against despair and inspire hope; a purpose he plans to fulfill by developing a fun and enjoyable persona that makes being want to listen to him- to understand his faithful cause. This persona becomes his ‘mask,’ “someone” he takes on and off that he switches between freely- the mask is meant to deny his immediate and primal instincts; otherwise- he'd be nothing but a pathetic, blubbering mess who can't speak about his passions because they would burden him with far too much grief- his doubts would be the first one to speak and he would immediately discourage himself from being open about himself- or properly using his voice.
This task requires a strong cat; someone who can bear the weight of the world on their shoulders- and be perfectly accepting to everyone. His purpose means more to him than anything else- more than anyone. He believes that it would fix lives- save lives- when the imperfections of clan life are pointed out and eradicated. He does this for the future; he acts to follow the path to guide us to a better da- never stopping to appreciate the present or reflecting on the past. What matters next is what's ahead.
He doesn't have time to humor a pathetic side of himself. In fact, he hates that part of himself greatly. He hates being emotional- he hates how much he cares about appeasing the code- appeasing the restrictions which harm more than they give. Why are they there, if so few cats decide to stay within those limitations? They drive him mad- and yet they make him oh-so-sad, looking ad thinking of the fates that could have been reversed if the clans had accepted that perhaps, these boundaries serve them no good.
The mask is the best version of himself. A friend. A brother. A son. A good member to the clan that acts as a harmless little lamb; a lamb from afar. Northernkit is a wolf in sheep's clothing- a beast that dwells inside Riverclan and wishes nothing more than to see it fall- so the clans can see their freedom; what greatness lies beyond their reach. He will not harm. He will not bite. His methods are not violent and he does not seek to use violence as methods of communication. And Riverclan itself isn't a threat; but it is not home. It will never be a home. It cannot be home if it cannot shelter all of its children comfortably- which it fails to do so at every turn.
Northernkit seeks to be strong. He seeks to become the answer.
His mask is exactly that and nothing but- something that lures those who would want to learn more about him closer.
Love and fear. Hope and despair. Two sides of a coin that should cancel each other out to create a world of peace; a world that does not have to restricted by rules- by leaders. He does not want to see suffering in a perfect world. He doesn't wish to shed tears for a world who cannot hear him. No one is listening above. It is only each other that they must rely on- and he will be the shoulder that those need to lean on.
He wants to earn the privileges in life the longer he works for the good of the beings around him- being endlessly giving to their needs and never to himself, so that one day- perhaps he will be earning of all the things that he has denied himself.
But first, he must act as a
SHIELD. To be a defender first is the most important step to establishing yourself. You must risk your body- your life- for any cost. Each action must be done with your full intent put into your heart. He must protect those who rely on him. He must keep everyone safe before himself; a soldier that yields to the words of those he loves.
SWORD. Being violent is to establish power. You must be violent to show that you are prepared to make sacrifices; that you will give up some things to receive more that will be better. You must be prepared to see blood. You must keep your words sharp- you must hold true to your command.
ARROW. A leader without wit is a coward who cannot control themselves. An arrow seeks for weakness; an arrow disarms the threat by remaining accurate in your intent. Each word you say must have defined meaning. A leader cannot speak without considering actions and words. A leader cannot use violence to resolve every problem.
SONG. He must be encouraging; he must rely on the strength of those who believe in him to be powerful. His power is not reliant on himself; his community is what makes him strong. Without community- a leader has nothing to fight for.
These four personifications come before his needs. These are what he relies on to maintain a mindset to guide him in the right direction. Without them- Northernkit would not know how to lead. But by establishing reasoning- key logic- he can come one step further to his true purpose;
Being the justice the world needs- Riverclan's Justice- by restoring hope. By bringing balance back into life.
Morals are a strict code that helps determine right from wrong.
But it also contributes to ethics;
what is true- what is false.
They help shape the truth you want to follow.
Morals are instincts-
instincts that you can always rely on in times of need.
MORALSMorals are built out of:
- Objects of importance
- Ethics
Objects of Importance.
Each moral question first comes from simple beginnings; the morals of how we treat our family. Or rather, how our morals exclude our families. We tend to think that they see you in a different light. Not an exact light, but a different one. And it justifies exempting them from your strict standards that normally, will never have a bypass. But family is different. Family is your shelter when there is no one else to turn to. They shape you just as much as you shape yourself- you are a mix of who they are- your personality reflects both sides of your parents. Your siblings share the same blood that boils underneath your fur. You are equal to each other- you are each other's first taste at belonging.
It is important to never lose this belonging- and that means that you must exclude them from your morals- so then you can build your standard around them.
And it starts with your parents; the ones who gave you an opportunity to be something brilliant; a work of art underlined in their name- you bear their smiles and your love.
To Sagesolace;Northernkit admires your playful and giddy nature- he tries to mimic to his best ability through every action; wanting to give the world the same cheer and excitement that you gave the world. He follows in your footsteps closely; he wants to enjoy the world the same way as you. But alas, he can never share that connection. Northernkit only observes the beauty that is found in the cats around him- h can't see any good out of the earth, the water- the sky. It only revolves around the cats that make this life worth living, and there's no reason to enjoy it when it serves so little of a purpose in life- if it hardly has any purpose besides being the ground to stand on.
Sagesolace, you are Northernkit's inspiration. You will always be treated kindly by Northernkit. He will do whatever you ask of him in a flash- your humble son; your precious son who is ardent to being labeled as a baby for the rest of his life. He doesn't care. Whatever makes you keep loving him so- he'll allow whatever you see fit. In turn, he will always call you the childish names you desire- daddy, dad, dada. Your warrior name will never be spoken by his tongue; he's far too undeserving of it.
But below a surface level love and care that any son would give to his father, he loathes your protectiveness. You shelter him so- and it's stifling him so. he would never dare to address it, but he hates how tightly you hold him close. He wants to provoke and explore the means of danger- and with you refusing to leave his side (along with Baylily's annoying and tiresome cautious measures)- he can't do what he wishes. And that is your fault. He blames you for making his lack a true directive to find that beauty in the earth- because he could never see it for himself when he is smothered and drowned by your honeycrisp-sweet love. \
But Northernkit will never address it. He can't. He's made a promise to never hurt you the moment he was born. And he will always stick by that faithful promise.
To Baylily;Perhaps the concept of the mask's development must be accredited to you, no? Northernkit loves your commitment to the stage, how you tend to cater to the audience before yourself. A mysterious and shy demeanor fits you well- and perhaps it contributed to Northernkit's love to pretend on the stage as well. Still, that being said, you have a special way of showing you care- your voice holds a depth that Northernkit always hopes to hold in his own. He wishes he could show care just as well as you- but he often struggles to make connection between meaning between words, and what a true friendship may look like. He cannot understand why you push most away from you- when you have a far greater potential to be an influential poet who can use his words for good. He seeks to understand words like you; how one truly preforms with ease on the stage.
From a distant standpoint, he respects you as his father, and he will always treat you the same as Sagesolace; being attentive to your many and plentiful needs, always standing by your side in times of emergency, and if need be- choosing to ignore the traits that annoy him so very much.
No being can be perfect, Northernkit understands that perfectly well. But the determination to fix his childhood by blatantly reversing what happened in yours will never fix a family to be perfect. You say you are quiet and keep to yourself- and yet, you take a far larger step than you should just to coddle your kits and keep them safe. He doesn't need to be affirmed that he is loved; Northernkit already knows that. Your overprotectiveness is too large of a barrier that prevents him from earning your trust.
Do you believe that your kits will not be successful unless you ensure that they can live life in the most mild manner ever? He hates your fear- and how you express it through your teachings. Fear is natural; embrace it and you won't have to worry. Northernkit isn't stupid enough to run far from home- so he wishes that you would have even the slightest bit of faith that his kits can monitor their own safety.
But that doesn't matter much. You will always be papa, father, dad. He may not be as so cautious to avoid your warrior name however- he doesn't believe it will hold such a tight importance compared to Sagesolace. However, you will be the only cat he turns to at the first sight of a threat- since you seem too prioritize safety so keenly. You will be his shield; just as much as he will be yours.
To His siblings;You will always be the ones favored in every decision he has to make. He will be your protector before being your brother; keeping you safe- a star to guide you as you find yourselves lost in a haze. He wants to make sure that you go unburned in this life- and will cling tightly to you by seeking knowledge and answers from you; his eldest and dearest siblings. He will make himself reliant on learning from you- an excuse to make you always look for him, to always wanting to be there for him. Northernkit will always make sure that you stay around him- that he orbits around you. If you need help, Northernkit will be the first to stand up and offer it. If you wish to learn from him; he'd gladly tell you about his observations he's noticed on a daily basis.
Of course, he'd never want you to share his burdens that he's placed upon his shoulders- so you will never know much about him besides seeing a friendly, and joyful character who is always looking for new opportunities to prove and express himself. He refuses to teach you about his purpose; you deserve better than to join him in an impossible goal. So, your relationship will always remain shallow. It becomes increasingly more obvious the longer you stay together; when you see just how flat he appears. Kind, innocent, sweet and loving. That's all that would define him to you.
But that's all he would ever allow himself to be to you. He defiantly rejects the malefactors that design him to be cruel to you. You are his to protect; to keep. He will have you in your own isolated bubble- his and his alone. He wouldn't let many cats grow close to you because he would never want any cat to hurt you; but of course, he can't control every aspect of your life.
But one thing he can control is how you perceive him. Things will remain unchanging between your relationship as you age- he will be nothing but a fragment of a memory in your eyes. But if you play along and embrace it, just imagine the life of persistent love and energy that will prevail.
To Other Relatives;To be honest, Northernkit doesn't care in the slightest what happens to you. He doesn't have the time nor energy to cater to each one of his family members; most who probably have other responsibilities to tend to. He will treat you the same as he does with any cat- and you are not exempt from Northernkit's bitter cruelty or sickly and sweet lies to wrap you into a trance. ‘Family’ does not include you. You are not ‘family.’ Family is who cares for him the most- who is there for him, always. You are just branches on a tree that extend far too deep into the ground- names he will not remember; faces that will blur with time the longer he doesn't speak to you. And he doubts that you have the patience as to interact with Sagesolace, Baylily, Solsticekit and Applekit in the way they treat each other. Family is a special privilege- a title that shows tight bonds and care-and you do not fit in that category. You are relatives. That is all Northernkit will refer to you as.
Of course, he will think of you in dire situations. He will always be there to clean up after you- or kitsit if you have no choice. But he has no intention to grow close to his other blood unless you actually try to make an effort to befriend him. His ‘real’ family will always be in front of you. But that doesn't mean that be entirely loathes or hates you. It's simply just an ordeal of where he chooses to place his attention. And to cats who possibly may never matter to him- that attention runs on a very thin and breakable line.
However, these mannerisms act.. differently, to those family members who no longer walk the earth. He may try frequently to unearth memories about the deceased parts of his tree- so that their memory may not be forgotten. To forget a loved one is one of the worst things you can do; they deserve to be just as active in moral lessons and stories as anyone else.
They do not deserve to fade when all they did was die. That is not the worst thing that someone can do.
It's natural.
It's normal.
so now we have the few exceptions labeled in the mind- the few that do not need to be a part of his purpose; or tied in ways too cruel for his family. He wants to make sure that he is always seen in good graces in their eyes; a place for him to be pure. To feel as close as he can to being normal. From their teachings- morals are born. what do you stand by? what do you want to fight for? Basic questions that strengthen your ability to receive knowledge; to understand what you want to live by. But morals cannot be developed without understanding what you seek in the long run of life- what lies outside of your purpose that still holds great value to you.
Ethics
From those that we love, we develop our morals based off of the ethics that we inherit from them. These ethics become our key morals; our very own compass that operates the rest of the body. For Northernkit, his parent's kind and moral teachings land well into Northernkit's internal code- something he chooses to follow first before the warrior code.
Treat other the way you want to be treated.
Northernkit tends to act far too soft towards others; he wants to be treated gently- to which he often does for others. He treats other cats as if they are breakable dolls; to take more caution when it comes to controlling a forked tongue. He understands that his sense of humor is fairly crude- but he doesn't want to frighten anyone or steer them away. It would break his heart to make an enemy. Unfortunately, this does mean that Northernkit often doesn't firmly set boundaries with others; and he doesn't care what others say about him (although he definitely does.)
Be kind.
If there is one thing the world needs less of, it is bullies who bullies with the intent to commit actual harm. While Northernkit harms others, he doesn't do so because he wants them to break. He wants others to see life the way he does- by taking note of unfair circumstances- and speaking up against them. But he doesn't want to be mean- or seen as mean. He will remain kind even if the conflicts outside the clan get worse. He will remain kind. He must remain kind.
Mind your words.
Words are far stronger than we give them credit for. They can be weapons just as much as stones can be. Words can dive deep into memories- words can twist the perception of those memories. Words can create false realities- words can make people believe even the worst attempts at lies. Words are to be treated with caution. If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say it at all.
Belief- the final part of the inner body.
What you choose to see the world as;
What you think a perfect world is.
It's subjective in hindsight,
but it's individuality between beings makes it far more endearing and appreciated.
It gives us a certain set of standards to follow that match with our morals-
what we choose to acknowledge.
What we choose to observe and understand.
BELIEFSBeliefs are built out of:
- Questioning our worldview
Questioning our worldview.
It is in a cat's nature to be curious. It is in a cat's nature to question the world around them; and jump hastily to their own conclusions. But each aspect of life must be observed- we do not categorize ‘life’ into a single grouping. We address flora, fauna, death- the list goes on. Our beliefs are unique because we ask ourselves a series of questions subconsciously; allowing us to develop our own distinctive systems of beliefs. One of the many things that makes life so special- it is never seen the same through each cat.
Northernkit's view of death and the deceased:
What is Northernkit’s view on death? How does he associate the worth of the living to the dead- does he believe death is a good thing, or that death is a bad thing?
Things death is not:
X a good thing
X a bad thing
At the end of the day, death has no true definition as to define its virtues- because nothing comes out of it. Death is simply the end of living. But what's important about death isn't its ethical alignment- it's what death represents that matters the most in any scenario. Some see death as a wheel; a ladder to climb to guide you to the next life. Others believe that it is divine judgment; to conclude where you will spend your eternity.
And yet to Northernkit, death is none of those things. It is not an extension of your life nor an exact result of how you lived your life. There is no place that goes beyond the waking world. You have a singular life to live. The afterlife is only cold- we don't find ourselves going up any higher. Everything just.. stops. Soon, our existence becomes nothing more than a concept- and we are only found alive through the memories of others. One life to live. No higher power to fear- no higher power to control our actions.
We do not have to be puppeted around by ‘Starclan,’ something he chooses not to believe in. It feels ridiculous. Why should dead cats get any say on what he does? his actions are his choice and his choice only. He shouldn't have to even remotely think about being monitored by being who rest high above. If Starclan truly was a respectable and peaceful afterlife- he's sure that they'd rather spend it enjoying their solitude; or reuniting with family members who had passed.
He doesn't shun the cats that follow Starclan- and he respects them just the same as he would to anyone else. But his religious followings are far less spiritually inclined than such ideas; and he'd prefer to keep it that way.
Death is a challenge to your faith; a testament to see if you will truly stay true to your purpose- by refusing to fear death. Death is like a wave that crashes; then everything goes still, black and eerie. It is something to fear. So, in order to show your faith, you must not fear it; and you must not run from death. If you run from death, or deny its importance, you are therefore ignoring the potential of your purpose; and had determined your life to be worth little to nothing in the long run. If you find fulfillment in your life- then you have found your prized purpose. But running from fate itself- you turn your life into a curse; fearing death leads to needless stress, guilt and fear that will consume you- and take away from your full potential as a being. Running from death is a silly choice anyhow; it's inevitably, the same path that every life ends at. We all take different paths in life- but it's always going to end the same! Death is a part of life. We are a factor that makes that cycle function. We hunt prey that is below us to feed our children. then, in order to conduct balance- we in turn are the prey for greater beasts if they do so dare. So if you openly embrace death and the idea of dying- then you understand that your life is a gift, and you start to appreciate it more thoroughly. You can die at any moment- and that encourages to enjoy what you are given; and you make an effort to make every second new and exciting.
Those are the basic principles of the ‘afterlife’ that Northernkit believes in; straightforward and strict in their demand and their requirements.
Northernkit's view on the world:
The world is split into two categories; the earth, and the inhabitants- those are the two things that makes up the world.
Inhabitants: Animals such as cats, fish, reptiles, and etc. all count as inhabitants. Inhabitants must have two things to be considered as a part of this divine ecosystem. 1. autonomy 2. speech. Only cats can understand other cats, obviously. Speech is a natural barrier than is only shared through the classifications of species.
If a human-owned Labrador spoke to a wolf; they would understand one another, as they share commonality by being both Canidae. If a cat were to meet a tiger- the possibilities are high that they too, would understand each other. Languages are branches- each common from a firm root and extending outwards; while the language between animals wouldn't be completely comprehensible- a cat would have better luck understanding other felines than they would birds or fish. Each language as a common derivative- that is then expanded on and pushed to its finest brink. Not one voice will be the same- but all inhabitants must have their own language- so they may express their freedom. Without a voice, things such as weeds and flowers do not count as inhabitants; but they would instead be part of the earth.
As for autonomy; it's more self-explanatory than the later. They must be able to act dependently and move on their own- create ideas of their own; live as a part of a whole. Plants do not think for themselves- they are controlled by the inhabitants; and don't have a set purpose that tells them to do otherwise- they have no language; no voice.
What makes up the earth has no relevance besides feeding and sheltering the inhabitants. The physical world itself- when the inhabitants are taken away- is ugly, and holds no significance nor meaning in the world. The beings who rely on the earth are what make the world flourish. There is no beauty within the earth nor is beauty caused by the existence of the earth- it is the beauty in the soul that brings the earth beauty; each individual with a unique story- a unique love. However, the world encourages stagnation in life- it's simple complex makes it easy for cats to accept what they have; food and water and shelter being enough to please simple minds to live simple lives. They accept this ugly, hateful world. But why is the world hateful?
That hate is a direct result of the greed of clan culture and clan life- they seek so badly as to create a culture that divides themselves from the rest of the world; proving themselves as ‘less animal’ than others because they have created a system- imaginary lines known as borders which lock them in place. Wars caused for crossing these borders that were supposed to ‘establish peace’ when they have done nothing but. But with the peace they have found now- they believe that said peace will always stay. The cats begin to grow afraid of change when change would help them embrace a better life; but wanting to see the world for how it is- not sticking by fake lines that keep them locked tightly in place. What the world has embraced is sloth- making the world awful. No joy comes from the earth without work- which is part of Northernkit's divine duty.
He must burden himself with the work of fixing an ugly, lazy world by forcing change upon cats- because he sees hope to be unveiled in this world and in their hearts. There is more to life than the clans.
Northernkit's view on love:
Love comes in many forms; it is no so simply as to be one romantic love, or familial love. There is self-love. There is love in friendship. There is familial love. Love exists as a method to distract; something to fill your life with endless noise to avoid responsibility- by making it a priority of your own. To those who can properly indulge in it, he sees it as a healthy thing. But Northernkit cannot love properly in the way others may seek. He does not feel attachment to anyone besides the attachment that is forced or dutiful- that is the love he shows his family, his friends. He doesn't want to rely too heavily on those who could hurt him. He knows that his mind is delicate- if someone can see through the mask; he'll splinter and fall apart at the seams- he'll lose all his power; all his worth. He wishes that he knew how to love- but he doesn't know how. Well, ‘doesn’t know' is a bit dulled down. He doesn't want to risk love because he could wear down everything he has worked so hard to preserve- and even more so, he doesn't want someone to think lower of him by settling for a far more simplistic life of love.
And he doesn't do well receiving love either. He feels as if he doesn't deserve it- he will never deserve it until his purpose is fulfilled; or at least until he feels that he's served his purpose well. But that doesn't matter. His heart belongs to all, and he cannot trust someone to take it entirely from him. The more someone tries to get closer to him and pry out his attempt at loving them back- the faster he will be to pull away and evade this cat. Any relationship he has must remain to their benefit- and not to his.
He could never be deserving of such a thing.
end of section ii
So there you have it.
A full glimpse into the spectrum that is Northernkit;
the one who fights for justice- for hope- by creating despair that others must endure.
He is the one who must hurt; who must keep everything balanced.
There is far too much violence and hate that pull at our hearts-
the violence that makes him want to break down at the seams.
But he must not. He can't.
Northernkit must be strong and wear his mask- a mask that justifies his power over all;
why he is the only one who is allowed to hurt.
Of course, he can't justify every aspect of his actions.
But he will fight to correct the imbalance of fear and despair.
It is what he owes the clan, for being given a peaceful and quaint life- that he doesn't deserve.
So that he stays deserving of their love- their good graces.
That is what it means to be Riverclan's Justice.
Now we reach the end of the four directions.
Each with a set function- each that builds into a part of his soul.
I thank you, kindly, for hanging in this long through this writing.
It's not often I get to talk so fondly about nothing more than a concept;
and I've found it to be quite fun just to create something new.
From here- it gets easier.
From here, you can see all parts of the character in play.
What makes Northernkit.. well, Northernkit.
section iii.
Additional Character Questions:
What is Northernkits’s character motivation?
(ex. Marmot: “I want to understand how to feel loved so that I can become a better person, but my dependency on my father’s love and attention prevents me from growing as a person because I believe I am already perfect in his eyes (he would tell me if I am not to his liking.”))
Northernkit: “I want to cause intense tragedy in the lives of others to teach them to fight for finding greater enjoyment in their lives; I want to help others find their purpose by being an obstacle to force encouragement.”
What can Northernkit’s story teach?
(ex. Marmot: Learning how to live for yourself, and not for the benefit of others.)
Trusting others to be kind to your true self; and not hiding behind excuses that force you to be a different person only because you are afraid.
How could Northernkit “learn to love life?”
(ex. Coltish: Seeing the beauty in love and wanting to obtain that same kind of love- becoming dependent on the feeling of infatuation and constantly on a “sugar high.”)
Northernkit: By truly finding connection with someone that would make him want to ‘betray’ his purpose- someone who encourages him to explore and truthfully enjoy himself.
general trivia
favorites
Color- Purple (Specifically cooler hues of lavender.)
Season- Leaf-bare (Believes this season causes more determination; causing more beings to fight for hope.)
Weather- Windy and cloudy days.
Scent- All things sweet! (Loves the scent of apple blossoms the most- they remind him of his family.)
Prey- Salmon.
Craft- The art of dance and song.
mannerisms:
- Cannot, for the life of him, sit still ever. He constantly has to move about during conversation and often gets distracted by the process- causing him to sometimes forget what a conversation was about at hand or miss out on certain instructions. He often needs things to be repeated to him.
- Northernkit is shockingly good at remembering things once he's been told of them, however. His memory is a tool he uses when speaking with others- as to prove the point that they've ‘already told each other so much.’
- Northernkit's manner of speech would alter slightly as he ages older in his time; he begins out with plentiful innocent and often bubbly sort of dialogue, which transpires into leveling charm in his tone, and not often getting overly excited about certain topics like he does when he's a kitten.
love language: Physical touch. He is an incredibly grabby and snuggly cat who loves to give hugs or receive hugs; but he unintentionally forgets to ask for consent to hug or love on others often- with may make his efforts at being clingy seem rude. He just gets way too excited around people he knows and will often come and invade the personal space of others; although not for any malicious reasons.
character inspiration(s):
Nagito Komaeda (DGR2:GD) - This one is the more prominent of the two inspirations; I liked his original motivator of wanting to get the killing games started so he could have the Ultimates produce hope; but I wanted to expand on that further- and thought, “Why would a character fight for hope to begin with?” I didn't want to completely include all elements of his character- as cool as he is to analyze. I hate taking too much inspiration from characters or they don't really feel like mine; so I'd say that really only Northernkit's ‘purpose’ is the only thing that's taken from Nagito.
Monika (DDLC) - Here comes the reason for Northernkit to only be in the spotlight and to have everyone he cares about stay only with him- I took very loose inspiration of her methods of manipulating her control that are present throughout the whole game- how she slowly grows more and more obsessed with the player until a point of no control. It is all about control; how can she control the player- how can change every outcome into making *her* as the only choice; the only answer. Northernkit doesn't really take much else from her character however- really the only thing they share is a need for control and dominance over all the others.
(I remembered one that I forgot about haha)
Momonga (Chiikawa) - The demand for constant attention and love. While it remains ever-so-slightly different from Northernkit's need for attention (he likes to have attention so it would bring him reason to be attentive to their needs- in a “you care about me I care about you” relationship- Momonga just wants everything handed to them and have attention because in my own personal scope of things; they have no idea how to act and possibly just want everyone to see them so they can be like, “I'm parading in a body that's not my own and you all are too stupid to notice.”) That's literally it when it comes to this character- I just like how pushy and mean this squirrel is and I hope they get what's coming to them eventually.
imagery inspirations/symbolism(s):
- Puppet strings; strings descending from the sky that wrap around him- symbolization of his need to picture himself acting in the will of his purpose- how everything he does is not actively being chosen by him.
- Masquerades; the characterization of his mask being an actual mask that he can take on and off at will.
- Eyes; someone silently observes his performance from above.
song inspiration(s):
(I have changed the original titles of the theme songs written in the three Japanese scripts into their romaji writing for easier translation to English.)
- Dou Kangaete Mo Watashi Wa Warukunai (Even If I Think About It, I’m Not Bad) - Kuroneko
- Tengoku e Ikou (Let’s Go To Heaven) - Kikou
- Cubibibibism - NEEDY GIRL OVERDOSE
- Candy Scar - Rubyeye, C!naH
Theme song lyrical analysis:
Song: Dou Kangaete Mo Watashi Wa Warukunai (Even If I Think About It, I’m Not Bad) - Kuroneko
“ Mirror, mirror, do you want to break honestly
// I don't need you, I don't need you //
Mirror, mirror, you're too honest
// Pretending not to hear //
What's not reflected is the beauty of the heart
// Delusion, that's a delusion //
Only the dull self is reflected
// Know the reality // “
This song has a special place in my heart; it's a song that I find myself interpreting nearly the same to the author's intentional, written message. That message reflecting the idea of how easy it is to hide behind another persona- that special mask- to escape judgment or escape the fear of being unaccepted by a community; taking on a completely new version of yourself to express a better you- a fake you; but ultimately better. The song is originally, supposed to describe the feeling of being able to ‘mask’ yourself over internet personas- and for once, you're free to be someone else. It's freeing- it's a nice example of just how easy it is to overcomplicate things. It relates heavily to the mask that Northernkit chooses to wear; that flamboyant and loud personality created because not only did he want to be free of protective authority and his compliant instincts- but also created because he wants to make a drastic difference in the world. It helped him find control. It gave him control over his life- and for once, he was free to do what he wanted. By making himself be in complete control of his life by establishing his ‘new self’ (a version of Northernkit that essentially goes without emotional understanding nor emotional complexity)- this new self becomes someone determined to show that he can take care of himself- enforcing justice and being the balance that the world needs. His job is thankless, and yet he is a Saint. He has become better than his ‘old self,’ a cat who blubbered over his words in order constantly- weakening his effectiveness at truly being a shining star. A tomcat who is too afraid of harming others to address his discomfort- a team player who keeps his mouth shut because he can't properly process heartbreak. Such a wreck of a cat. A compliant and seemingly innocent cat? How boring! All that he's doing is slowly building up pent up and distressed emotions the more he tries to preserve the expectations of being a ‘good son.’ There's more to life than that. But if he continued without his mask- Northernkit would be weak. And what's the good thing in being weak? Absolutely nothing. So, this wonderful and incredibly dazzling persona is created with the idea in mine that the more he inflicts misery on others, the more he can rebalance the world. By seeing others tolerate and rise above feelings of hurt and helplessness- he feels less alone in this sad, empty world. Once they see it his way; he can give them all the kindness and attention that he'd like to- a star to shine above all. He separates his ‘righteous’ self from the weak-willed and shy kitten he used to be- who then becomes the mirror's voice to ridicule his shamed version of himself.
Meanwhile, the cat calling to the mirror image of himself is the cat of the ‘past-’ of the one that is essentially snuffed out by a larger flamboyant version of himself that while he wants to completely erase so he doesn't have to be burdened by feeling sad and constantly ashamed of trying to fix a world that cannot be changed- but no matter how hard he tries, this version of himself will always be a part of him. No matter how much he weakens it- his natural flighty behavior will somehow- be ever-present in his thoughts. But in this scenario; they separate into two different cats. The first is his complex; the one who executes being the Justice of Riverclan. Being the Justice is far more important than addressing the proper truth or being vocal about the thoughts that bubble below. The mask allows him to be someone new. A prettier, put-together cat who can be someone great. His thoughts are so unimportant and miniscule when it comes to the grand scheme of fixing ‘clan life’ as they know it, so why bother keeping his mind on himself? If he makes the mirror the only voice he turns to- the only cat he is- he can stay true to his purpose in a proper manner. Northernkit is the mirror of himself, reflecting everything he isn't- and yet, still retaining those childish loves and dreams to be adored and beloved- a goal that the ‘new Northernkit’ can fulfill. And in order to thrive, it's better to toss away the cat that only held him back- ignore it and become a new being entirely.
This chorus is a conversation between the mirror and the ‘old Northernkit-’ a timeline where the mirror is the first thing that Northernkit finds himself turning to. That he acknowledges his weakness- sees the strength of the mirror- and realizes it's potential as a better version of himself- trying to desperately find any way to break it. Somewhere- deep down- a hate festers within him. He hates knowing that the mask is the only thing that makes him a memorable character- so he questions it's strength. “Mirror, mirror you're too honest,” is Northernkit knowing that the mask highlights him as a liar just by wearing it- the mirror is everything he isn't, and yet so badly wants to me. The mirror shows exactly what he is- a liar. A liar wanting to make things go his way because he wants to be better than everyone else- to compensate for his lack of self-love. He doesn't know who he is supposed to be- but he knows that he has a goal- a purpose. Toi be the ultimate catalyst of hope and love- by forcing others into positions that require them to stand up against pain; pain that he must cause because it is too heavy of a burden for ‘anyone else.’ The method of being allowed to inflict despair into the world itself is the mirror. It speaks the truth. It tells you everything you don't want to hear. You feel lesser. It directly causes him pain- a source of despair. That's all it knows, saying things such as “I don't need you, I don't need you” and “know the reality.” And the reality is that he is a coward. The only way to run from that reality is by loving and cherishing that mirror- that mask- and making it who he is, to both discourage himself from being truly honest with himself.
Miscellaneous Information:
- The wisp of fur that goes over his left eye is upheld by small flecks of honey that is combed into his fur by using pointed seashells or clamshells that he collects from the shore of the ocean. When touched- this stylized fluff may feel sticky; so he often avoids letting others touch the top of his head- for the sake of their own fur.
end of section iii
Do you see it now?
Do you understand what justice is now?
Can you see the truth?
Can you see why Northernkit must be cruel?
Every action- every movement- is done to create a better life.
A happier world.
..Right and wrong is a difficult manner.
So I choose to see it as there is no right or wrong;
there is only an answer.
That answer being balance.
Being hope.
Being despair.
We need both hope and despair in our lives.
Without either-
there would only be a world of stagnation-
unmoving and unchanging.
What a bore!
section iv.
writing example
(This will be done in the format of a self roleplay. Prompt: Northernkit can't seem to sleep- the hot air appears to irritate and pester him.)
Northernkit. He/him. 4 moons. Moonhigh.
I feel like my skin is boiling under my fur. He laid flat in his nest- rolled over on his back with his paws clutched tightly onto his chest- he could feel his heart starting to beast faster the longer he chose to sit here and endure the heat. Gah- he hated nights like this. Wait, no- hate is a very, very bad word. But hated was an understatement; and he couldn't think of a better word that wouldn't be so negative just yet- he could hardly think, the longer he sat awake. How can anyone be fine with sitting here? He hated the fact that even if it's time had come and went- the sun still held power over the world. It was not welcome in the night's domain and yet still, it raked it's claws into the dry dirt and persisted. Now- there was no saving grace of a cold night. If he couldn't sleep now- ah, just imagine how upset Sagesolace and Baylily would be! They'd tell him, “I told you not to sleep in,” or “Next time, don't drink water before you go to bed.” But it's none of those problems that caused this. But- ah, he didn't want to be a bother. He… certainly disliked the idea of disappointing his dads. Just imagine how sad they would be; maybe that could help pass the time. But how could he go back to sleep now? The damage had already been done- he was aware of the stickiness that surrounded him. Suffocating him. Forcing him to pass right back asleep. But he refused to submit to something that wasn't under his control; he refused to do something that wasn't his choice. This was why he hated the heat. It limited the potential of things that you could do in an average day- and it ruined everything! He didn't want to laze about in the sun and he didn't want to submit to its control.
This is stupid. A voice inside of him spoke loudly- his wordless frustrations gaining its sentience. Just go to sleep. How hard is it?
Very hard, actually- thank you for asking! And Northernkit could list every reason as to why. First, right now wasn't a good time to go back to sleep because there were many things wrong with the picture. Everything wasn't the way he needed it to be for him to sleep; the air was too dense, he was laying on the wrong side of his nest, he can't stand the sound of other kittens snoring and the moonlight was in his eyes and it was miserable and it was annoying and it was going to be impossible to sleep if all of things kept going-
Yeah, okay. Sure. Just keep making every excuse- I'm sure that will fix things, you big crybaby. ..Ugh. Maybe he was being a bit too much of a crybaby? Why was this such a big deal, anyways? Just because he couldn't sleep doesn't mean he couldn't just.. go back to sleep if he really tried, right? But- others would probably do it better than him! And if he wasn't the best then why did he bother? But you needed sleep to thrive and yet everything just wasn't- working out- …He just wished that he could stop himself from being so climatic. It's one night without sleep- what damage will that do in the long run? And if it does do damage; you can figure it out yourself. You have. You can't just keep clinging to your parents and expect them to help you. You're getting older. But they've made me dependent on their love.. how am I supposed to function when I need them to do everything for me?
And who's fault is that? He asked himself. He… knew the answer. But what good of a son would he be if he didn't let his parents conduct his childhood in the way they wanted? It was fine- he didn't need to speak up about how tiring it was to be engulfed in their love. They deserved that much from him. They do everything for him, and yet somehow, he still finds a way to be ungrateful for what he is given. And that even rings true now- as he sits here, staring blankly up in the sky; trying to look to himself for answers that he already knows. But he.. he needs to know if those answers are correct, right?.. He needs to know if he's making the right choice.
He's being ungrateful right now, isn't he? Oh dear. Yes, yes he definitely is. He has a nest under his head. He has shelter over him. He has a family who loves him. He needs to go back to bed. That's the end of it. he subconsciously felt his claws shift in his grasp- they slid out when he had gripped his chest tight. He sighed, looking at them; how their tips caught onto the glimmering moonlight that bothered him so. He didn't want to complain about everything- but it felt hard not too. It felt so.. difficult to just.. mhgh..
he didn't expand on the thought further.
Northernkit had enough. He forced himself to shut his eyes close and began to tense his muscles quickly- hoping that if he wore himself out; he'd pass out- just as the heat wanted him to. But he'd do it on his own terms.
.
.
End self roleplay
(Hi there! Yes, you! If you found yourself entranced by this splendid piece of art and would like to engage in a- what is it called again? oh, yes, a joint roleplay; then please feel free to ask! I would be happy to roleplay with others- I will gladly take any chance I can to practice with Northernkit's roleplay style. Thank you very much- you're free to continue.)
conclusion
In this paragraph, I have hidden the tfcrp codewords.
So there's a few things that I would like to reiterate before I conclude this application (Yep- that's right- you're almost there! Congratulations! Almost crossed that red ribbon finish line!) First of all, Northernkit does not have BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder/Bipolar Personality Disorder); he does not react differently to certain situations. His emotional side will react first before he quickly stifles it up- the mask is just Northernkit effectively trying to make himself better- and separates his emotional, ‘wimpy’ nature from himself to animalize it- so that he doesn't have to listen to it further. It is not a separate personality- it is just the personification of traits that make him feel lesser and weak. Okay- that out of the way- seeing this litter come out is just such a great way to start fall, I was hooked on Northernkit from the moment the interest project was released- and I hope that this application proves just how locked in I was on his character. I had such a fun time working on this application- and I hope by now that you have come to enjoy it yourself.
Hopefully I don't start any big projects like this for a while- I feel like I would die. Although this didn't really feel like a big project. scary… Well! Thank you for reading, dear reader- I hope you enjoyed your time here while it lasted. I also wish the best of luck to any other person who applies for this litter- whether that be for Northernkit, Solsticekit, or Applekit. I know this litter is going to produce some amazing works of art- and I'll be keeping a close eye on any sort of application I find. (I love reading other applications- the differences in character ideas are truly my favorite part of applying.) That being said, it is time for us to depart. I hope you had a splendid time here.
Take care, and have a wonderful day! (Or night- er- orrr whatever! There's far too little time to list off each little thing. Bye-bye now!~)
end of section iv
credits:
application(forum) layout by @quilliamjuicing (@-quillow- ), feel free to use as long as proper credit is given to the layout creator (me, quills)
back to applicant's original litter application project: “ the means of justice in the court of the stars. ” a northernkit application
original litter project: ⋆ ˚。 A MATTER OF TIME ─⟢ open riverclan litter⋆ ˚。
(Don't ask me how I got this massive hunk of an application done so fast. It was an act that not even the spirits themselves could slow. It was like I was possessed- the more I typed the more I thought about what I could expand upon. I wrote this application like I was drafting my final letter in life and only had a day to do so (well, this took about three days- but the point still stands. This is probably 3x as long as my usual applications. God help us all.)
Last edited by quilliamjuicing (Sept. 16, 2026 15:38:26)
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