⚔. ✧˖°✧✧･. “ the king's knight ” ♛
♞ a valorkit application … ♖

.⚜.

╰┈➤ table of contents
╭ i. about the roleplayer
┊ ii. meet the knight
┊iii. rp examples
┊iv. miscellaneous
╰┈┈

“ there will come
a soldier ”

♛ SECTION I . about the roleplayer
°. ♙♖ includes: names, brief introduction, activity levels, experience, tendency to harm characters

♜ username + preferred name
@apriii with 3 I's, you can call me april !!

♜ brief introduction
hi hi! i'm april, your average bookworm. i'm a catholic girl using she/her pronouns and i would love to get to know more about you all! i've been on this website for almost four years, on different accounts. a few things i enjoy are reading, writing, drawing and spending time with my family and friends! i think that's all the basic facts, let's move on!

♜ activity levels
from a scale of 1-10, i'd say i'm 7/10 active. i usually go on scratch everyday for about 1 or 2 hours. so, i'd say i'm pretty active. the only things hindering my active time is school and exams, which are coming up pretty soon unfortunately.

♜ experience
since i was a little kid, i really liked writing stories. as i grew up, i developed my writing skills more and i have won several notable awards in school because of my writing. in scratch, i have been roleplaying since 2023 and i'd say i'm a fairly good rper, though obviously not the best.
my responses range from 1-5 comments, but it all depends on the person i'm roleplaying with. if they respond with one comment, i'll respond with one comment. if they respond with four, i'll also respond with four. so, i'd say i'm a pretty flexible rper.
for my past characters in roleplays, i have too many to state (from my old accs too). but in tfcrp, i have recently won swan, a loner, from a loner adopts. he is currently 14 moons old.

♜ tendency to harm characters
if we're talking physical harm, i don't tend to harm my characters much. unless for plot reasons. maybe a scratch here and there, but not anything major unless it is crucial for valor's storyline.
for mental, i think everyone has to have ups and downs in mental health. it just wouldn't be right without a few ‘questioning life’ moments. and plus val is a bit arrogant, so i think he'll have quite a few mental beatings throughout his life to mold him into a better person (cat?).

“ who carries
a mighty sword ”

♛ SECTION II . meet the knight
°. ♙♖ includes: character i'm applying for , reason why i'm applying for this character , why i should get this character , final gender and sexuality , longevity , personality, plot ideas , beliefs + relationship dynamics

♜ character i'm applying for
valorkit!! my beloved <33

♜ why i'm applying for this character
the first time i saw him, i was honestly so flabbergasted. like, please. his design was so detailed and i love the shield and swords and honestly every little thing in his design. i instantly thought up of a full on personality for this little kit and i really loved the possibility of getting to be the little soldier's rper. i just saw that this little heck of a warrior would be perfect. plus, he had a loving family. so, here i am!

♜ why i should get this character
well, first of all, this is by no means showing that i'm better than all of the other participants. they all have an equal chance of winning valorkit and their applications are amazing too!
but if i were to win valorkit, i swear to keep him and give him a fulfilling and happy life, with an actual story and not just a jumbled mess of random roleplays with random people. i'm not going to just win him, rp with ppl, then he dies and done, story ends?! no. if i win him, i will give him the life full of ups and downs, full of storylines and plots and i will give him the life he actually deserves.
secondly, i tend to get very attached to my characters. it is highly unlikely that i will get rid of valor while he's still young. i see tons of potential in him and i promise to bring that potential out. i will not just get rid of valorkit when he still has a whole possibly great life ahead of him, no! i will try my very very best to keep him and give him a good and long life, one that he deserves.

♜ final gender + sexuality
i think i'll keep him cismale and using he/him pronouns for the rest of his life. as he is young, he will refer to himself as the ‘knight king’ or male ruler titles. i feel like he will never outgrow this title and just keep his gender static. also, i feel like he won't actually care about gender much and just stick with his original gender just for the simplicity of it.
for sexuality, i think i'll make him bisexual. of course as a kit, he'll be straight, not understanding terms like that. as an apprentice, he will find out he's bisexual, though with a female preference. as a warrior, he'll stick with what he chose as an apprentice.
keep in mind, both of these are not set in stone!

♜ longevity
i honestly will try my absolute best to keep him for the longest he can live. i tend to get really attached to my character, and i would want him to live a long, happy life. i would definitely keep him for 30+ moons, but i would aim for above 70 moons? i don't definitely know, but i hope i can keep him for many, many moons.

♜ simplified personality
( + ) positive traits : courageous, disciplined, loyal, humorous, confident, persevering

( = ) neutral traits : vigilant, stubborn, authentic, blunt, spontaneous, adventurous

( - ) negative traits : overly competitive, haughty, prideful, impulsive, bossy, overprotective

♜ detailed personality

- overview (to me, this is simpler but better writing)

a swish of a tail, a flick of an ear, you meet yourself with the formidable knight you know as valorkit the brave. despite his short stature, he stands with a confident aura that you yourself have never encountered before. courage radiates from the chocolate-covered kit, the strong ray of light in the sea of darkness. he will be the one to run through the fire with no hesitation, even when death itself shows its face. when darkness seems to strike and the undefeatable knight seems to finally fall to his demise, he gets back up again, perseverance indeed! was this kit hand picked by the gods to save the world from all its monstrosities? well, it is debatable. the knight has of utmost discipline for his training, willing to dedicate his life to preparing to eradicate the bad. the respectable knight will train day and night until he is ready to take on the challenge. of course the hero of our story has to be a man of great fidelity, with unwavering vassalage to his kith and kin. no challenge or test will ever lead him to betray his loved ones. but what is missing? ah, of course, our main character has wit and humor. albeit not the funniest clown at the party, he certainly knows a few jokes for any occasion, big or small.
our great knight is vigilant, ready for any attack that might befall him. ears and eyes always open, he will detect any ambush before it hits him. the knight king is always ready to defend himself, his thoughts and his ideas. try your best to change his mind, but he will stick to his own descisions, thank you very much. the young soldier will forever continue to speak his truthful mind, his honest tongue never telling lies. he always speaks what is in his head, whether its good or bad. of course, our main adventurer has to know how to improvise, but sometimes his actions are unexpected and irrational. and what's a story with no adventure? this kit will continue to have a strong lust for exploring and venturing far beyond the lands he know.
of course, if there is light, there is darkness. here we will present to you the rather… less likeable side of our supposed ‘hero’. our knight here has a thirst for victory, an unsatiable hunger for the trophy. often times he will go too far for a simple competition amongst friends, ending up in the other competitor feeling hurt. our main character also is quite prideful of himself and tends to flex the power and gifts that the gods had given him at birth, leading to some thinking that he is arrogant. this kit has a sharp tongue, words sometimes edged with haughtiness and a sense or a feel that he is above you in the levels of life. the knight king is also a person who acts before thinking, leading to his impulsive thoughts getting the better of him and taking control. you never know what he might do next. this arrogant side of the knight also tends to tell people what to do, barking out orders for the lowly servants. he doesn't realise it, but our hero is rather peremptory. and of course, a knight like him has to have a protective instinct to defend his kingdom. although it is noble to have such qualities, nothing is good when excessive. our hero's dominating personality will lead to slight toxicity in his relationships with others, even if his intentions are merely to protect them from any dangers.
so there, you have seen the upsides and the downsides of the brave knight called valorkit. what do you think now?


- positive traits (this is the part where i ramble on and on, feel free to read it) ┈┈

courageous ♙ possessing or characterized by courage; brave
⌗ like his namesake, val is one valorous kit. he will never back down from any trial, big or small. if he is presented with a challenge, he will never say no. he will face the great dangers of the world without even batting an eye. he is the intrepid youngling of the group, the first to come up to the big, scary shadow behind the corner. if someone asks him to go swimming in a deep lake, even if he doesn't know how to swim yet, he will agree and come along as he is not trepidatious about trying new things. this little kit will grow into a valiant warrior, constantly striking at new corners with no hesitation at all. as he progresses into his life, he will continue to tackle new opportunities without any vacillation turning up. as a brave soldier and knight that has to defend his kingdom, valorkit will continue courageously charging into battles to fight for himself and his close ones around him. this will benefit him as a warrior as he is not apprehensive to fight the multiple challenges that will be present in his life.

disciplined ♙ having or exhibiting discipline; rigorous
⌗ with great power comes great responsibility. val is rather disciplined, consistently training and practicing to become a better warrior. he believes that to become the best warrior, he has to train in consistent efforts, rather than some people, who only have spontaneous bursts of energy at the last minute. if you give him a task, he will train everyday and try his level best to accomplish it. some people slack off, some people are too lazy to practice, to train. valorkit is not ‘some people’. he will follow his given training diligently and never ever ever dawdle. he believes a knight like him will never get far while lazing around all day. for example, if he is sets a task for himself to bring his mother flowers everyday, he will follow and search for the best flower he can give to his beloved mother. he's the one kid in your class that studies everyday after school.
one of his goals as a kit are becoming the best soldier the whole world will ever see. the inner knight's mind in him will never let him rest until he accomplishes this goal. so, he started his training as a kit. as a kit, he will conestantly ask his littermates or other kits to play fight with him, thinking that it will train him to be a better soldier when he grows older. although it is not real training, it matters that he started small, as he will grow into an even better soldier when the time comes. as he grows into an apprentice and warrior, he will practice everyday if he can, alone or not, to fulfill his childhood dream of becoming one of the best. of course, this could be affected by very extreme situations, but overall valorkit is a very disciplined kit.

loyal ♙ faithful to any leader, party, or cause, or to any person or thing conceived as deserving fidelity
⌗ val believes that betrayal is one of the most brutal things you can go through. like, imagine overhearing your closest best friend suddenly gossiping and talking bad about you. you thought that they were close to you, apparently not! val knows betrayal hurts a lot, so he will never betray another person. from a young age, he will learn to never stab another person in the back, no matter who they are or what they did. for example, his littermate could become a worldwide supervillian as they grow older, but valorkit will never fight against them or reveal his littermate's secrets to anyone else. even if you bribe him with a million shiny diamonds, he will never agree to betray someone. once he's close with someone, you can trust him to have your back and you will never be dissappointed with val as your friend.
also also, val is loyal to his devotions and beliefs. lets see, if val believes in something like starclan or whatnot happens in the stars, he will continue to believe in it no matter what other people will say. “oh, i thought starclan isn't real” or “oh starclan's dumb”. maybe they might say that, or criticise his faith in such. but no snide comment will break val's faith. he believes its just better to stick with one thing, through and through, always and forever. (to be clear, the starclan thing is js an example, i have no definite idea on his beliefs yet)
in addition, val will always stick to his opinions and causes. he believes that if he sets a goal, he cannot abandon it, despite what happens next. val will also not change or question his life's cause. for example, as a kit he believes that his cause of life is to become the best warrior ever in the whole entire world. he will stick to that cause, and continue fighting to achieve his dreams. no matter what others might say, val will never let words break his stride.

humorous ♙ having or showing the faculty of humor
⌗ val is a funny lil' guy, who can whip up a joke anywhere. no matter the situation, you can trust val to cheer you up and give you a big ol' laugh. val is the jokester, the jest of his siblings. he is the clown that will chuckle no matter the tough times. whenever his close ones are feeling down, he feels down too, and he just can't bear to see his friends and family upset or suffering. honestly, even if val will say he doesn't really care, inside he actually does and he will try his level best to give you something to smile to. he might do this by maybe acting comedically, like faking falling down and staging a very melodramatic speech where he loudly declares that he is dying, “oh woe is me!” hoping he will get a laugh out of his companion. another way is just making teasing comments, though he usually reserves this for his siblings or close friends. you know how you and your best friend sometimes insult each other and banter? well, sometimes val does it in hopes of cracking a slight chuckle as him and his companion travel through reminiscences of the past. also also the most common way that val tries to cheer someone up is just normal jokes. “hey, do you know why the mushroom went to the party? because he was a fun-gi!!… okay yeah, that was lame”. usually val isn't very… witty with jokes, but at least he tried, right?

confident ♙ sure of oneself; having no uncertainty about one's own abilities
⌗ the little knight he is, valorkit is confident of himself, never doubting his ability to do something. if battle cats did debates (ermm this is totally not my debating personality showing :cough: ), he'd have the loudest voice in the room. no one can break his stride, no one can persuade him that he is not worthy of anything. val is sure of himself and his skills, and he won't let anyone do anything to shatter that confidence that is within him. if someone talked bad about him, his personality maybe, he wouldn't care. i mean, he knows already his ups and downs and he's not afraid to admit it. hell, he would even be confident enough to just walk up to the person and accuse them of gossiping about him. ngl but that would be kinda funny when the short guy goes to the tall meanie and says, “yo, you gossiping ‘bout me?” lmao going back from that slight detour, basically he’s very confident in himself and his traits as a whole, no matter what anyone says.

persevering ♙ displaying perseverance; resolutely persistent; steadfast
⌗ a true knight never really backs down from a fight, does he? as i probably said before, val is very disciplined and he will bounce back from any challenge he faces. fell down? he gets back up again. gets a scratch? brush it off, blow on it, problem solved. he doesn't believe it's worth stopping a journey just for a small problem. i mean, why don't people just ignore it and go on? being the tenacious knight he is, val will try and try again to achieve his goals, no matter how difficult the task is or how many times he has failed. for example, he wants to become the best warrior in all of the clans, right? well, he is prepared to endure the suffering, the intense training, and all the stuff he has to do to reach that goal. he will walk through fire, swim in ice until he deemes the challenge finished. he resonates with those TED talks about never giving up, he is the one that will give that inspirational speech about never surrendering to the torture. whenever his friends or family talk about their life being too much to handle, val is the one that will instantly launch off into a pep talk about tenacity and strength.

- neutral traits ┈┈

vigilant ♙ keenly watchful to detect danger ೀ
⌗ valorkit is the knight in a battle, never really at peace. he is tense, waiting for any attacks from the neighbouring kingdoms. what would he do if his kingdom was under attack and he wasn't ready for it? all times he is keeping vigil, protecting himself and his close ones from any coming danger. he will be ready if someone does a surprise attack on him, nothing can fool this wary knight. he believes that to become a true knight, he has to have constant vigilance. you know, anybody could approach you at anytime. this will mean that he always has his ears and eyes open, as well as his other senses. an unusual smell, a strange sound, anything will be found by valourkit the vigilant. this will prove ti be helpful as a warrior, but sometimes you just have to relax and not be tense.

stubborn ♙ fixed or set in purpose or opinion; resolute
⌗ a knight has to stick with his ideas through and through. val will defend his plans and thoughts with his whole heart, and let no one change an already settled arrangement that he picked out. when he has an idea, no one can change his mind. he will only change his plans if it is really really important thing. he's the one in the family to bargain with the dealer on the price of the item hh (/j). although his ideas might sometimes be wrong, what matters is that he is ready to defend himself and his own original ideas. but sometimes you just have to accept the fact that you are wrong. so this stubbornness can sometimes be annoying but it can also prove useful sometimes.

authentic ♙ representing one’s true nature or beliefs; true to oneself or to the person identified
⌗ a knight is always true to himself, his thoughts, his actions. valorkit always says and does what he promises. he says what is actually on his mind, and he does what his body really wants to do. there are no lies in his words, no faking in his actions. it is pure valorkit all the way. no way is he diverting his words and actions from what he really wants to do. no matter what anyone says, he will continue to be honest with himself. he will express himself as he wants, and not shape his personality to others likings. he does what he wants, wherever he wants, whenever he wants. nobody can boss him around to do the things that he himself doesn't even want to do. if he were at a party and wanted to dance until he hits the floor, he will do it, no matter all the weird stares he will probably get from other people. honestly, it's good that he stays true to himself, but sometimes his impulse actions aren't always the best.

blunt ♙ abruptly plain and direct in address or manner, without attempting to be tactful
⌗ a true knight always speaks his mind. val is truthful, although blunt. he says the things that are on his mind, but those thoughts might be a little.. rude. it's what you might call ‘brutally honest’. val is honest, and that's okay. however, sometimes being honest isn't the best thing to do. sometimes he will point out things that are.. not that kind. for example, he would openly state that he thinks (your cat) is rude. just that. no hesitation, no thinking first, he just says it. “ya know, you're pretty rude.” just like that. often times it will get him into fights, sometimes it will make others insecure and cry. the point is, sometimes honesty is the best policy. but other times, you just have to say the things that make others stay happy.

spontaneous ♙ coming or resulting from a natural impulse or tendency; without effort or premeditation ೀ
⌗ val tends to be a bit reckless with his actions. once he has an idea, he'll do it. sometimes he'll just go on a hunting trip in the middle of the night. since he's pratically afraid of almost nothing, he'll just do it without any second thoughts. he believes that making things up on the go is actually beneficial. of course, there's nothing wrong with improvising things last minute, but sometimes you have to think first about it. (wip)

adventurous ♙ inclined or willing to engage in adventures; enjoying adventures
⌗ a brave knight at heart, val has a dream to travel the whole world and see its beauties. throughout his life, he will have some short expeditions and adventures all across the clan territories and maybe venture even further beyond.. beaches, forests, mountains, he wants to see everything. he's not scared to go around and try to see all the new things that he hasn't seen before in his shadowclan home. as a warrior and an apprentice, he will tend to venture farther away from his own clan and go on ‘expeditions’ to the wilderness. there's nothing wrong with trying to know more about other territories and places, but sometimes your have to be cautious in your steps, you never know what's lurking in the wild.

- negative traits ┈┈

overly competitive ♙ having an excessive desire to compete or to succeed
⌗ of course, a knight must have his comrades and his peers to compete with. who is the strongest, who will get the throne? those are the questions that valor himself will ask. often he is pressured by the inner winner in him to always try to be the winner. sometimes he lets the best of his arrogance get to him. when you have a winning streak when you play games with your friends, you are bound to want to keep that streak going till the ends of the world. that is exactly how valorkit feels. he feels that if he fails, he will be a disappointment to his inner knight. so sometimes he goes a little bit too far. he might not notice himself doing it, but he might hurt those around him, both physically and mentally. for example, he might be in a wrestling match with one of his friends, but he might accidentally inflict a serious wound on his friend. or he might hurt someone with his sharp tongue, maybe he unconciously said something hurtful that scarred his friend on the inside. the point is, although winning boosts your self-confidence, val just lets his competitiveness take the handles and he might go beyond the boundaries of his comrades.

haughty ♙ disdainfully proud; scornfully arrogant
⌗ due to being the most wonderful knight that he is (/lh), val thinks of himself as the king of the castle. he thinks that he is higher than any other cat in the world (except for his mom and siblings ofc) and that they should bow to him. he doesn't realise that he's being haughty and snobbish honestly, it's just in his blood. all the rude comments and mean retots that he makes, he thinks that it is just the way he should act, since he is of the highest stature. you know, sometimes royalty get caught up in their riches and treasures and prizes that they forget that they have to uphopd morality and grace. like king john of england, who was once a kindly ruler, but turned hungry for money and power, then eventually started a war. sometimes his haughtiness is disguised in backhanded compliments and jokes. this snobbish behaviour, i guarantee, will upset some cats throughout his lifetime. it isn't very moral, but genuinely val doesn't know he is doing it. he just is blunt and haughty like that.

prideful ♙ thinking too highly of oneself; conceited, arrogant, or overconfident
⌗ as i said before, val takes pride in the wonderful knight he is. he thinks of himself as the strongest, the best, the knight king of the world. he puts himself on a pedestal, where no one else can reach his level. he tends to see himself as a king, showered in gifts and galore from the heavens above, born rich with power and strength. although he's not actually the best at anything, he tends to flex. maybe he will call a friend to see him do 2000 push-ups in one minute (if cats can even do push ups..) or he might flex a cool rock he found on one of his expeditions. point is, anything cool he gets his hands on, he will literally show it off to the whole world and let everyone bask in his glory and treasures. of course, it will get really annoying if he does it everyday, but truthfully val wants to get popular (wicked theme song plays in the background.. :pensive face) and show everyone the cool things that he found as well as all the achievements that he did.

impulsive ♙ actuated or swayed by emotional or involuntary impulses
⌗ as a knight rushes into battle, there is not much time to think about what to do. mostly it's just guesswork and improvising. that's what val does. he doesn't think before he acts, just does the action that is the first thing that comes to mind. oh, he thought about approaching that cute girl at the corner of the room? bam. he will go there, rizz her up, get her number (pls don't cancel me this is a joke). done. but naw what if she rejects him? he will go emo for the rest of his life (pls dont cancel me this is a joke sobbing). he takes the risks, he never thinks, before he goes off fighting all the enemies. his only thought? that it will all go better as he progresses. of course, it doesn't go like that. it never goes like that. basically, impulsiveness can definitely get you into trouble and trust me, val will get into trouble. a lot.

bossy ♙ given to ordering people about; overly authoritative
⌗ being the knight king, of course val has to order people around. he sits on the throne, everyone must do what he says, always and forever. he tends to give orders a lot, even if he doesn't notice. he will literally unconciously tell someone to shut up and then order them around. no but like he always tells people what to do. he expects them to follow it, because he's the king. but obviously, being the sensible people that they are, probably no one will follow this ruler of sorts because frankly nobody wants to be bossed around by a shortie..

overprotective ♙ having the excessive quality or function of protecting
⌗ a knight always protects his kingdom. val's kingdom consists of his family and closest friends. he will do anything and everything to protect them from the dangers of the world. he will run into the fire with no hesitation if it were for his beloved kingdom. but sometimes this noble protectiveness, as val calls it, can go a bit overboard. sometimes it can get domineering and annoying, though not to the really really extremely toxic stage. basically, sometimes he will order his friends or family to do or not to do stuff. guilt-tripping is also in the book. whenever he feels that they shouldn't do something, he will forcibly prevent it. this can get quite hurtful at times.

♜ plot ideas
⌗ “the aspiring knight” - kit age
as val is rescued from the wild by tuni, he will see tuni as his angel and strive to save lives like she did him. he dreams of one day becoming like tuni, a knight in shining armor, coming to save someone in trouble. he will basically just play fight and train his senses during this kit stage, not much to do. he might attempt to sneak out a lot, trying to see the outer world to prepare his defenses.

⌗ “the knight in training” - apprentice age
i have like a vague idea of him forming like, a training club(?) maybe. during apprentice age, he'll maybe rally up all other cats close to his age, make friends with them, and maybe invite them to his battle club. he will train them all the things he has learned and try to instill the battle courage in them. maybe like his own little army? anywho, he will train his absolute hardest, not even resting when he feels unwell, determined to keep fighting and training. he will start to feel.. a bit strange in this stage, like his life is repetitive. wake up, eat, train, sleep. wake up, eat, train, sleep. and do it all over again. but he pays no attention, shrugging it off as feeling a bit sick.

⌗ “the young knight escapes” - early warrior age
as soon as val becomes a warrior, he will be proud of his title, flaunting his role. but as the days go by, he will start to think that his life holds no real meaning. only to fight, to train. due to his intense training during his apprentice age, he starts to feel a bit distant from his family. he falls into an existential crisis, wondering, thinking of what his life is even supposed to be. he runs away from shadowclan, head spinning, trying to find the answer. what is his life purpose?

⌗ “to become a true knight, one must find himself first” - early warrior age
as stated before, val will run away without telling anyone. he will simply.. disappear. into thin air. but in reality, he's out venturing the forest, clan hopping maybe. he's trying to catch a specific thought that is hiding from him, that lays far beyond his beloved shadowclan home. he wanders the islands, visiting all the clans as he tries to find the answer he was looking for the whole time. he meets some people, some wise people, who teach him.. that you have to enjoy life. all his life he was hustle and bustle here and there, training all the time. but the didn't realize that wonderful life was sprouting literally under his feet and he didn't see it. he will learn along the way that it is not really the best to keep on pushing himself to be the best, and just to sit back and relax for a bit. he might find some new friends, some crushes, but the main point is that he has changed. not drastically, but that very very determined air is gone. yes, he is still himself, but he doesn't push himself to the ends of his limits.

⌗ “the knight has found himself” - warrior age
val returns to shadowclan, stories in hand. he reconciles with his old friends and family and promise to care for them more than ever. he starts slowing down, relaxing, enjoying the ittle things in life. he is truly happy now. he might find a mate, have a litter, maybe even aim for a leader position. i'm planning for him to maybe regroup the training group from apprentice age and maybe have another community where they can train and explore together? other than that, he'll go on adventures and just basically enjoy his life till his demise. not full planned out yet.

⌗ “the knight grows old” - elder age
as his candle dies down into a puddle of wax, he will know it. he will go on one last adventure, as tribute to the long knight's journey before. this is not really set in stone, cus this is still a very long time away until he reaches this stage.

♜ beliefs
⌗ starclan: i have no idea about the shadowclan traditions anymore so please just bear with me through this guesswork sobbing. so i'm pretty sure that val wouldn't really believe in the traditional clan beliefs as yk, starclan is just a bunch of dead cats telling people what to do. he doesn't think starclan sounds very impressive or domineering and he generally will just not really believe in starclan, df and others like that?
⌗ tsd mythology: i believe that the tsd have like,, deities and gods and other stuff? please correct me if i'm wrong. since his mother is of tsd lineage, i'm pretty sure val would be fairly interested in this. having deities for different aspects of the world would really draw val in. i mean, god of life and death and water ans bla bla bla? that honestly sounds interesting. val would probably ask a lot of questions relating to the snake gods. i'm pretty sure he would look up to the gods and kindaa believe in them.

♜ possible relationship dynamics

⌗ petunia's beloved (mother): valorkit thinks that his mother is his one and only queen. he loves his mother dearly and will always agree with what she says. he will never ever disobey or try to argue with petunia's beloved vocally. he might disagree with some of his mother's choices, but he will never express it verbally and scold himself for thinking bad of his mother's choices. think of the queen and the hopeless servant that comes rushing at tuni's beck and call. or like, mama's boy, yk? idk much about tuni, but i just imagine tuni and her son just having a close relationship. as they get older, i think that val will get even closer to his mother and actually just worry about her more as he knows her candle of life is slowly melting to an end. also, during val's kit to apprentice period, expect tuni to get a souvenir every other day. since val's adventurous and likes exploring new places, he might bring his family souvenirs from his ‘worldwide travels’. but overall, i think val would love his mother to the moon and back, no matter what.

⌗ epochkit: this is honestly just based on guesswork and rambling ideas, as there is no definite personality for him. so i actually think that val would kind of look up to epochkit just a bit since he's older but have the normal sibling rivalry with him? like, he won't hesitate to call them ugly mouse-brains but he will defend his epochkit if they were ever bullied or hurt. since val is the soldier of the family, the knight, i think he would feel protective of epochkit, even if he's not the eldest. also, prepare for val's never ending requests for battle training as well as a bombard of souvenirs from his ‘travels’. like his gifts might be like cool rocks or things like that. some nicknames for epochkit: mousebrain, poe, epoch, poo /j

⌗ laurelkit: again, this is not definite but just a simple idea sketched out in my head. idk what laurel will be like, but i was thinking that she could be the one to soothe val when he gets carried away with his emotions? just a random idea lmbo. so anyways, he'd be protective of laurel even though she's older probably taller cus he's short. he'll also ask to battle train, and give some gifts as well. a few ideas for the mentioned gifts are maybe nice leaves that he found, flowers, feathers, yk just things he thinks fit her ethereal appearance. some of his possible nicknames for laurelkit: butterflybrain, lau, loo, lulu, lullie, laurie

⌗ mementokit: once again, this is just a rough sketch and not definite. since val /is/ actually older than mementokit, he'd feel extra protective of her, yk cus he's supposed to protect his younger siblings. he'll basically treat her the same as his other siblings, ask for play-fights, give her souvenirs, defend her when she's getting bullied, bully her himself, bla bla bla. some gift ideas are bows(?) made out of like natural stuff idk, feathers, other things like that. some possible nicknames for mementokit: butterflybrain, mem, memie, mems, mento

⌗ platonic relationships: as a friend, valorkit will feel protective of you, especially if you're close to him. i think he'd make many friends as he's quite an outgoing and confident kit. he'd treat his friends with respect, although they have to expect some teasing now and then. he will go on adventures with them, invite them to battle train and stuff like that. charming and humourous, this kit wouldn't hesitate to just go up to a stranger and rizz them up..

⌗ romantic relationships: not going that deep into this cus he's still a small kit, but i'm adding this nonetheless. as a romantic partner, val would feel especially protective of his companion, and blame himself for not protecting his partner if they get hurt. he will show his soft side to them and try not to hurt them, with words or claws.

“ he will
tear your city down ”

♛ SECTION II . roleplay examples
°. ♙♖ includes: joint roleplay samples, self roleplay samples

♗ srp example i. ⭒ valentine ( he/him , 3 moons ) .. the forest idk where .. chilly .. newleaf ⭒ midnight ⊹ ࣪ ˖

cold. val felt cold. he mewed pitifully, a sign of distress. he shivered. the wind outside whooshed past his fur, sending chills down his neck. he slowly fluttered one eye open. then another eye. in the darkness, you could see two blue-green orbs staring.. at what, exactly? the eyes flickered around the whole shadowclan nursery, searching, looking for… where was she? the brown kit thought to himself. he didn't know her name yet, but he knew she had saved them. unconciously, he was sent back to a few hours ago, when everything changed.. out in the wild, four kits, including himself, were curling up against each other. the howling winds of the night frightened them, and they were absolutely freezing. with no roof over them to protect them, they huddled close together in a fruitless attempt at staying warm. the endless forests echoed an eerie but silent sound, the forest noises bouncing off the tree trunks. although he would never admit it to anyone, valentine was scared. terrified, even. he put on a brave face before his siblings, assured them that they would be fine and the two-legs would pick them up soon, saying it was a prank. but valentine knew. it wasn't just a silly little prank. he had seen their grief-stricken faces as they set the basket down and lefts the younglings to fight for themselves. he knew they couldn't possibly be faking it. it was all real. a breeze ruffled the young kit's fur, and valentine was transported back to the present. he sighed. it wasn't really thrilling getting stuck in that memory, but it was still too fresh to get out of his mind. his gaze flitted to the nursery entrance. it was still dark. he felt the soft movements of his siblings sleeping, and started to drift off. as he was slowly lulled into a land full of dreams, his last wish was that his queen would come back soon.

explanation: this is right after val and his siblings were rescued by tuni. he wakes up and tuni isn't there and he gets a flashback of when him and his siblings were alone in the forest. bla bla bla the end.

♗ srp example ii. ⭒ valorkit ( he/him , 6 moons ) ⭒ shadowclan nursery ⭒ clear skies ⭒ green leaf ⭒ midnight ⊹ ࣪

the chocolate-covered kit waited, waited with bated breath. 6 moons. the time for him to level up to the next level. since his mother had brought him here, to the place he now knew as shadowclan, he had been anticipating this moment. turning into an apprentice. the young kit knew, that now he was free. free to explore the whole world if he wanted to, free to train as much as he felt needed. but yet, even after imagining all those wonderful things that came along with apprenticeship, valorkit still felt a knot in his stomach. nervousness? no, he didn't feel nervous at all. he was prepared to train his hardest, to become the best warrior shadowclan had ever seen. no, it wasn't that. perhaps it was a sense of… nostalgia. he rewinded time, flicking through the pages of memories in his head. he remembered the first time he had been saved by his angel, brought over to a safe place where he could flourish and grow. he remembered play fighting with his littermates and fellow kits in the nursery. he remembered the first time he had been declared champion of a game called mossball, and his heart had fluttered with the joy of victory. he sighed. maybe he wasn't ready to leave his kithood behind. it had felt so short, so evanescent, like a single second. but he knew, that he had to grow up sometime. valorkit took a deep breath, and went outside, ready for the challenges he was going to face…

♗ srp example iii. ⭒ name ( pronoun/pronoun , age ) ⭒ place ⭒ weather ⭒ season ⭒ time ⊹ ࣪ ˖

content

˚. jrp w/ @aquamist1 ⭒ valorpaw + laurelpaw ⭒⚔︎

˚. jrp w/ @otterpocketss ⭒ valorkit + laurelkit ⭒⚔︎

˚. jrp w/ @rain-whisper ⭒valorkit + petunia's beloved ⭒⚔︎

“ oh lei, oh lai
oh lord ”

♛ SECTION IV . miscellaneous
°. ♙♖ includes: cw, credits, useful links

♜ cw
honestly, val is so cute, its like cupid shot an arrow through my heart. also, val sometimes accidentally tramples tiny little sprouts, i feel bad for them, cus i know they have spirits (

♜ credits
˚. litter by @rain-whisper
˚. application by @apriii
˚. you for reading this far <3
˚. dictionary.com for some of the definitions
°. the oh hellos for the song lyrics

♜ links
♗ back to litter
♗ back to application

°•. ♞⚔︎⛨⚜♛♜ .•°

this is the end. thank you for reading my valorkit application. i hope that you have found the journey to valor's kingdom pleasurable. good luck on the rest of your journeys ahead <3

..

☁ idea dump..

the soldier of the family
defending everyone from invading kingdoms
literally wields a sword on his shoulder lmbo

thinks of his family as a royal family
as a knight, he has sworn to protect them from any danger

very loyal to his own kingdom

if he were a knight he would actually say this vv
“welcome to the kingdom of…”

but like he really likes fighting and training yk
wants to be the best knight in the world

he can possibly become leader??
i mean like maybe one day idk

short and wiry guy but in reality he trains a lot to yk, get buff
unfortunately for him i will make him lean or somthing
i mean like, he has muscles but he's slim and his muscles are like not that defined yk

his old name would be like,, valentine or smth? i have this small idea that the owner of the candy shop gave 4 kittens to his gf on valentines day and the gf named val ‘valentine’ in honor of the special day that she got the cat. also, valentine was originally a boys name so its not that weird okay…
or or or maybe something like king or something like that js to fit with his ‘knight’ vibes.

♞⚔︎⛨⚜♛♜♙♖♘♗♕♔

☁︎ trivia time !! <3

also guys don't mind the numbers being messed up </3 i just couldnt retype all the numbers correctly okay lmao

- 1. likes

• play fighting
  tba
  

- 2. dislikes

• people underestimating him
  tba
  

- 3. hogwart's house
gryffindor
- 4. scent
• i honestly think he'd smell like the forest, or pine cones. also rain/petrichor. maybe a slight hint of jasmine? but just a little.
- 5. average wake-up time
• 6am, gotta wake up nice and early to hit the gym.. /j
- 6. average bedtime time
• 11pm, usually i think
- 7. hobbies

• play fighting..
  training
  tba
  

- 8. red flags
- 9. favorite flower
• he doesn't really like flowers but like if he had to pick one he'd pick a petunia (like his mother) or a mimosa (idk why its random help-)
- 9. favorite gemstone
- 10. favorite scent
- 11. least favorite scent
- 12. favorite place
through any terrain, he doesn't really care, but a nice cozy place with a comfy bed to sleep in… also surrounded by his family and friends. he might develop a liking for a certain place when he's older.
- 13. least favorite place
- 14. dnd alignment
- 15. element (earth, fire, water, air)
fire
- 16. choice dnd class
- 17. favorite / least favorite weather
his favourite weather is prob like,, a cooling sensation. maybe like just after the rain? his least favourite is prbably really hot and humid, he doesn't really like it..
- 18. favorite time of day
afternoon maybe??
- 19. fears / phobias
disappointing his loved ones
losing his loved ones
- 20. quirks
- 21. talents
- 22. mannerisms - ( idea from dnd )
- 23. favorite color
sage green, comforting to the eyes..
- 24. childhood / teenage / adult voice claim
- 25. ideal
- 26. opinion on spiders
he doesn't quite like them, but he puts on a brave face when someone's around him and just flicks it away. inside he's freaking terrified, he hates the feeling of creepy crawlies with their long legs just.. no.
- 27. opinion on bugs
val doesn't mind them. like, ants, bees, butterflies, ladybugs and all those similar to that? he doesn't really care. but then, if its like… flies or mosquitoes, they're honestly just annoying and digusting.
- 28. opinion on reptiles
meh. they're okay. he thinks that some reptiles are cool, like crocodiles chomp chomp. but like, if its a plain lizard he'll just gobble it up. a bit scared of snakes, but only if he identifies them to be dangerous.
- 29. opinion on birds
they're honestly kinda cool, but like val's not that much of a bird freak. he just thinks that some of them are pretty, but he wouldn't hesitate to just hunt one for a snack.
- 30. problem solving skills
- 31. physical endurance
no matter all the scars and stabbing pain that val faces, he always strives on. i think he has a good physical endurance idkk.
- 32. mental endurance
- 33. divergent faction
- 34. hunger games strategy
- 35. view of the world
well, it's just good, idek.
- 36. belief in starclan
- 37. mythology parent ( zeus, apollo, thor, etc )
tyr? yk, norse mythology? he's god of war i think
- 38. favorite cat
mother and siblings!! especially mother <3
- 39. favorite prey
jackrabbits maybe?

- 40. favorite type of tree
- 41. jaw strength
- 42. favorite word?
- 43. favorite biome?
- 44. scratch account name?
@/valourous–
- 45. favorite season?
newleaf!!
- 46. opinion on the ocean?
- 47. what pokemon would they be? ( thank you wil )
- 48. what does their laugh sound like? ( thank you sadie )
- 49. how do they hunt? ( thank you constel )
- 50. how do they fight? ( thank you constel )
- 51. favorite weather? ( thank you constel )
- 52. least favorite weather? ( thank you constel )
- 53. favorite texture?
- 54. least favorite texture?
- 56. least favorite day of the year?
- 57. favorite day of the week?
- 58. least favorite day of the week?
- 59. favorite group?
- 60. favorite kingdom?
- 61. favorite element?
- 62. favorite number?
- 63. type of humor?
how do they view:
- 64. social heirarchy?
- 65. conformity?
- 66. clan systems?
various parts of the warrior code:
- 67. no hunting on other clans' territory?
- 68. defend your clan, even with your life?
- 69. loyalty to your own clan only?
- 70. eating order?
- 71. always eat the prey you catch?
- 72. apprenticeship age?
- 73. vigil?
- 74. apprenticeship needed for deputies?
- 75. new deputy being chosen before moonhigh?
- 76. no fighting at gatherings?
- 77. borders?
- 78. fighting trespassers?
- 79. neglecting kits?
- 80. warrior code rules made by the leaders?
- 81. no killing?
- 82. break the code if eating kittypet food?

- 156. aesthetic if they had a scratch account?
- 157. what would they need to get done in order to call a day successful?
- 158. goals in life?
- 159. sticky, yay or nay?
- 160. how do they view other cats in general?
- 161. how easy is it for them to make friends?
- 162. how easily do they become angry?
- 163. what would one need to do to make them angry?
- 164. do they feel sadness?
- 165. how often do they feel emotions in general?
- 166. thoughts on life? ( thank you bug! )
- 167. thoughts on death? ( thank you bug! )
- 168. nicknames
- 169. commonly used words
- 170. do they have a catchphrase?
- 171. if so, what is it?
- 172. bad habits?
- 173. love language?
- 174. how do they want to be seen?
- 175. how do they see themself?
- 176. are they competitive?
- 177. what sense do they most rely on?
- 178. what are their pet peeves?
- 179. how would they respond to praise?
- 180. how would they respond to a threat?
- 181. what are their eating habits?
- 182. do they believe in happy endings?
- 183. what are they sure is true, no matter what is argued against it?
- 184. what are they sure is false, no matter what is argued for it?
- 185. what's their opinion on various ranks?
- 186. what are they good at doing?
- 187. what are they bad at doing?
- 188. what traits do they like to see in other cats?
- 189. wof tribe? ( thank you marv )
- 190. if invited to a halloween party, what costume? ( thank you marv )
- 191. which chocolate would they be? ( thank you marv )
- 192. what cereal would they be? ( thank you marv )
- 193. what expressions do they use the most?
- 194. what would be their theme song?
Acessories
- 195. do they have any accessories?
- 196. if so, which are optional when drawn?
- 197. which aren't optional when drawn?
- 198. if they have any semi-optional accessories, what are they?
- 199. in what scenarios are those accessories optional?
- 200. in what scenarios aren't they optional?
Stats!! You may use decimals.
- 201. What would you rate their hunting skills, out of five?
- 202. What would you rate their fighting skills, out of five?
- 203. What would you rate their climbing skills, out of five?
- 204. What would you rate their swimming skills, out of five?
- 205. What would you rate their charisma, out of five?
- 206. What would you rate their speed, out of five?
- 207. What would you rate their intelligence, out of five?
Normal questions again
- 208. how long would you like others to draw their fur?
- 209. is their fur spiky, soft/rounded, elegant, or curled?
- 210. how much do their whiskers curl?
- 211. how do they start conversations?
- 212. introvert, extrovert, or ambivert?
- 213. do they like making stories?
- 214. what do they want most?
- 215. why?
- 216. what do they think their biggest flaw is?
- 217. what do others think their biggest flaw is?
- 218. do they belueve they have a purpose?
- 219. if so, what do they believe it is?
- 220. what type of items would they treasure most?
- 221. what would they think were the most thoughtful gifts?
- 222. if they could change one thing about themself, what would it be?
- 223. how would they react if someone confessed their love to them?
- 224. do they feel like they belong?
- 225. what motivates them to work hard?
- 226. what role did/do they want, when they were/while they are small?
- 227. if they could be anything for a day, what would they be?
- 228. if they could only eat one meal for the rest of their life, what would it be?
- 229. what three words would they use to describe themself?
- 230. Do they think they're brave?
- 231. what's the easiest way for someone to earn their trust?
- 232. what's the easiest way for them to lose it?
- 233. if they knew they were going to die the next day, how would they spend the current one?
- 234. do they like recieving help?
- 235. do they give second chances?
- 236. do they think dreams have deeper meanings?
- 237. what do they think makes someone a good person?
- 238. where do they go for inspiration?
- 239. what gives them hope?
- 240. do they believe in signs and omens?
- 241. do they believe in any conspiacies?
- 242. how good are they at keeping secrets?
- 243. what's their favorite thing to do?
- 244. would they survive a zombie apocalypse?
- 245. are they good at puzzles?
- 246. do they sing when alone?
- 247. do they think they're friendly?
- 248. what is the biggest compliment, to them?
- 249. what's their least favorite emotion?
- 250. if they were able to change the clans, what would they change?

-ˋˏ ༻ human au !! ༺ ˎˊ-
- 1. first name
- 2. last name
- 3. middle name
- 4. what music would they listen to
- 5. favorite food
- 6. ( everything from now was added ) favorite tv show?
- 7. board games or video games?
- 8. favorite board game?
- 9. favorite card game?
- 10. favorite song?
- 11. favorite band?
- 12. What type of hat? ( thank you soul )
- 13. job?
- 14. pokemon team? ( thank you wil )
- 15. outfits? ( thank you sadie )
- 16. dog or cat person? ( thank you sadie )
- 17. favorite holiday?
- 18. what car would they drive?
- 19. do they have any allergies?
- 20. if so, what are they? ☄˚₊‧

credits to @1gamer234567 for the trivia questions !!

end..

.. incorrect quotes

guys guess what you get incorrect quotes because i'm bored
also this is by no ways accurate i just copy pasted the whole thing

Petunia's beloved: We need a way to lure in new customers?
Mementokit: Maybe we could have some fun, interactive events!
Valorkit: Epochkit bath water.
Epochkit: ABSOLUTELY NOT!

Laurelkit: If there are no questions, we’ll move on to the next chapter.
Valorkit: I have a question.
Laurelkit: Certainly, Valorkit. What is it?
Valorkit: What’s the point of human existence?
Laurelkit: I meant any questions about the subject at hand.
Valorkit: Oh.
Valorkit: Frankly, I’d like to have the issue resolved before I expend any more energy on this.

Police: You’re under arrest for trying to carry three people on a single motorcycle.
Valorkit, with Laurelkit and Epochkit behind them: Wait, what do you mean THREE?!
Police: Yes…three.
Valorkit: Oh, my God— What the *bleep censored because i dont want scratch to cancel me*!?
Police: Wha-
Valorkit: Mementokit FELL OFF!

Laurelkit: The salary of a clown is 51,000 dollars.
Laurelkit, gesturing to Epochkit and Valorkit fighting: And yet these idiots do it daily, and for free!

Valorkit: I'm going to get myself some soup.
Mementokit: Be careful not to burn yourself, it's hot.
Valorkit: Pfft, I won't burn myself.
*30 seconds later*
Valorkit, entering the room: I burned myself.

Valorkit: I’ve never been in a snowball fight before. I don’t know the rules.
Petunia's beloved: What?
Valorkit: Is there a point system, or is it to the death?

Valorkit: I feel like Epochkit is looking down on me.
Petunia's beloved: That’s because they’re on the counter and you’re short.

Mementokit: Caffeine no longer keeps me awake while I work, so instead I have Valorkit periodically send me texts saying ‘we need to talk.’
Mementokit: It gives me the right amount of adrenaline and fear I need to keep going.

Epochkit: Why would you give a knife to Valorkit?!
Petunia's beloved, shrugging: Valorkit felt unsafe.
Epochkit: Now I feel unsafe!
Petunia's beloved: I’m sorry…
Petunia's beloved: Would you like a knife?

Valorkit: “Ladies and gentlemen” is unnecessarily gendered, overly formal, lengthy, and honestly, I’m falling asleep already. “Cowards” on the other hand, is inclusive to all genders, to the point, and dramatic.

Petunia's beloved: Assert your dominance over your friends by kicking them in the face, and then giving them a little smooch on the forehead!

Epochkit: You spent all our money on THIS??
Laurelkit, putting tiny raincoats on ducklings: They live outside. They need this.

Mementokit: What's the most illegal thing you can do with one dollar?
Valorkit: Exchange it for a hundred pennies, put them all in a sock, and then beat someone to death with it.

Epochkit: Why does Mementokit always do the laundry so loudly?
Valorkit: So everyone knows that no one helps them out in the house.
Mementokit, in the distance: *slams the washing machine shut*

Valorkit: I would do anything for money.
*later*
Valorkit, covered in blood: THE STATEMENT STILL STANDS!

Valorkit: ARE YOU-
Mementokit: ****ing.
Valorkit: KIDDING ME?! YOU-
Mementokit: ***king.
Valorkit: IDIOT!
Epochkit: …What was that?
Mementokit: Laurelkit banned Valorkit from swearing, so I’m helping them out.

*The gang's thoughts on stabbing*
Laurelkit: Would never stab anyone.
Epochkit: Would stab someone in retaliation.
Petunia's beloved: Yells “I won't hesitate, *****!” first.
Mementokit: Would stab without warning.
Valorkit: Would stab as a warning.

Laurelkit: Valorkit has no survival skills, their need to win has replaced them.
Epochkit: That can't be true!
Laurelkit: Watch this.
Laurelkit: Hey Valorkit, race you to the bottom of the stairs!
Valorkit: *Throws themself out a window*

Mementokit: *Gasp*
Laurelkit: wHAT??
Mementokit: What if soy milk is just milk introducing itself in Spanish?
Laurelkit: *inhales*
Valorkit, in another room with Epochkit: Why can I hear screeching?

Epochkit: Don’t you have any dignity, Mementokit?
Mementokit: Uh, no.

Valorkit: How do you connect with a fictional character?
Epochkit: What?
Mementokit: What?
Petunia's beloved: What?
Laurelkit: *pulls up a 500 slide presentation* I'm glad you asked.

Laurelkit: But what about Epochkit?
Petunia's beloved: Don't worry about them.
Petunia's beloved: I once watched them fall down 5 flights of stairs, stand up, and keep eating their hotdog like nothing happened.

Mementokit: We all have our demons.
Petunia's beloved, grabbing Valorkit: This one’s mine!

Petunia's beloved: Did you have to stab them?
Epochkit: You weren’t there. You didn’t hear what they said to me.
Petunia's beloved: What did they say?
Epochkit: “What are you going to do, stab me?”
Petunia's beloved: That’s fair.

Valorkit: You deserve a reward for putting up with me.
Petunia's beloved: You are my reward.
*meanwhile*
Mementokit: You deserve a reward for putting up with me.
Laurelkit: True, you can be really difficult at times.

Valorkit: I love hearing Mementokit shouting at someone else. It makes such a nice change.

*During a game of Hangman*
Mementokit: Nope, there’s no Q. You lose.
Valorkit: Are you kidding me?! You can still add something!
Mementokit: I already added a belt, four earrings and an extra arm! YOU LOSE!

Laurelkit: Where did you get that tomato soup?
Epochkit: It’s actually a bowl of ketchup I just microwaved.

Valorkit: If you water water, it grows.
Petunia's beloved: …What.
Mementokit: They've got a point.

*Laurelkit is fighting a monster*
Epochkit: Just stay calm! You already have everything you need to beat it!
Laurelkit: The power to believe in myself!?
Epochkit: No, a knife! Stab it!

Valorkit: Laurelkit, Epochkit keeps bullying me at school.
Laurelkit: Ask your teacher for help.
The next day…
Valorkit, to their teacher: Will you help me beat up Epochkit?

Laurelkit: We call that a traumatic experience.
Laurelkit, turning to Petunia's beloved: Not a “bruh moment”.
Laurelkit, turning to Epochkit: Not “sadge”.
Laurelkit, turning to Valorkit: And DEFINITELY not an “oof LMAO”.

Mementokit: Would you rather kill Valorkit, or—
Epochkit: Yes, kill them.
Mementokit: I didn’t say the other thing—
Epochkit: I don’t need to hear it.
Valorkit: …I’m feeling a little unsafe.

*talking about Petunia's beloved*
Valorkit: They are beauty.
Epochkit: They are grace.
Laurelkit, runnning into the room: THEY CAN DESTROY THE HUMAN RACE!

Petunia's beloved, near tears: Please, Epochkit, I don’t speak meme! I don't know what a ‘yeet’ is!

Epochkit: wow you and Valorkit are home early from the movies. What happened?
Mementokit: We got kicked out because Valorkit wouldn't stop yelling diving scores as people jumped off the titanic.
Valorkit: That last guy had a solid 8, I'm telling you!

Epochkit: I taught the dog a new trick. *throws ball* Fetch!
Dog: *just stands there*
Valorkit: He didn’t do it.
Epochkit: I taught him to ignore social conventions and think for himself.

Epochkit: Hey, do you know anyone who can teach me to play the trumpet?
Mementokit: Why?
Epochkit: I want to wander around playing it to annoy Laurelkit.
Mementokit: Technically, you don’t actually need to know how to play the trumpet well for that.
Epochkit: Mementokit, you have opened my eyes.

Petunia's beloved: I told Valorkit to grab snacks for everyone.
Laurelkit, looking through the options: Why did you grab fruit snacks? Are you five? Who even likes Fruit Snacks?
*Petunia's beloved, Valorkit, and Mementokit raise their hands*

Petunia's beloved: Mementokit, why does your bucket list have ‘Die’ on it?
Mementokit: So I can die feeling at least a little bit accomplished.

Petunia's beloved: I haven't seen Laurelkit and Valorkit for fifteen minutes now.
*Outside a nearby window, a car without a driver inside is seen rolling down a driveway, with Laurelkit and Valorkit running after it in a panic. Petunia's beloved doesn't look outside at all.*
Petunia's beloved: That probably means they're getting into trouble.

Epochkit: How would you like your coffee?
Valorkit: As dark as my soul.
Epochkit: Got it, one cup of milk coming right up!

Laurelkit: I just learned a way to get stuff on the cheap. Steal it!

Epochkit: Valorkit? What are you doing here?
Valorkit, wearing a hawaiian shirt, sunglasses and holding a gatorade: My best.

Laurelkit: Are you alright with constructive criticism? I don't want to sound mean.
Mementokit: No, go ahead. I want to hear it.
Laurelkit: It sucks.
Mementokit: That's not constructive criticism.

Demon: Hey, I took your soul last month and-
Laurelkit: No returns.
Demon: *sobbing* But it's making me sad…

Epochkit: Enough! How dare you mock me in such a manner!?
Valorkit: Well. How would you like me to mock you? I take requests.

Mementokit: Valorkit and I were crossing the street, and this man drove by and honked at us.
Laurelkit: What did you do?
Mementokit: They chased him to the next red light, and reached into his window, and-
Valorkit: *walking in* Who wants a steering wheel?

Epochkit: How are we supposed to put a tracker the size of a penny on Laurelkit without them noticing?
Petunia's beloved: Hey, Laurelkit, I bet you 5 bucks that you can't swallow this penny.
Laurelkit: *takes and swallows tracker* Pay up, loser.
Epochkit: …

Valorkit: Honestly, I am so evil. So full of darkness. I feed of the souls of the living I strike fear into-
Laurelkit: You sleep with a teddybear.
Valorkit: He’s my sECOND IN COMMAND IN MY ARMY OF DARKNESS!

Valorkit: Have I ever told you that I love you with my whole heart?
Laurelkit: For the love of all that is holy, I am not taking you to McDonalds. It’s 2am!
Valorkit: Mean.

Laurelkit: Would you take a bullet for me?
Petunia's beloved: …yes?
*Valorkit angrily burst into the room*
Laurelkit: *running away* Great, thanks!

Valorkit: Fine! I admit it. I still can’t swim! I never took those lessons at the community pool.
Epochkit: Valorkit… You promised!
Valorkit: You wanted to put me in the beginners’ class with the little kids! I can’t be swimming around with a bunch of five-year-olds! They can be so cruel when they sense weakness…
Laurelkit: That’s why, on the first day, you have to beat up the biggest one in the yard.
Epochkit: …Laurelkit, that’s prison.
Laurelkit: Only if you let it be.

Laurelkit: My only talent is being stress.
Petunia's beloved: Don't you mean stressed?
Laurelkit: No.

Laurelkit: Jellyfish have survived for 600,000 years without brains…
Valorkit: A ray of hope for me!

Laurelkit: If I punch myself and it hurts, am I weak or strong?
Mementokit: Strong.
Epochkit: Weak.
Petunia's beloved: An idiot, is what your are.

Petunia's beloved: Guys… the principal just called—
Mementokit: It was Epochkit!
Epochkit: It was Valorkit!
Valorkit: It was Laurelkit!
Laurelkit: It was me!

Valorkit: You borrowed a crane?
Laurelkit: Not exactly.
Mementokit: You stole a crane?!
Laurelkit: Exactly.

*The squad has just arrived in a new city. Laurelkit looks around at the wanted posters to see if they’re on any of them.*
Epochkit: Laurelkit, are you a criminal?
Laurelkit: Not here, I’m not!

Epochkit: I'd roast you, but my mom says you can't burn trash.
Epochkit: *slow-mo walks out of the room*

Laurelkit: *sighs*
Mementokit: You bored?
Laurelkit: Yeah.
Mementokit: Wanna start drama for no reason?
Laurelkit: I thought you’d never ask.

The Squad: *walking at the mall*
Petunia's beloved: Hey, have any of you guys seen Valorkit? They’ve been gone for a while..
Laurelkit: Eh, nope.
Mementokit: No, I haven’t…
Epochkit: Probably ran off to McDonald’s or something.
Valorkit: Hey.
Petunia's beloved: Ooh, there you are-
Laurelkit: What the-
Epochkit: I- where were you?!
Valorkit: Walking right behind you guys.

Laurelkit: It’s the gift that keeps giving!
Petunia's beloved: It’s the flower that keeps blooming!
Epochkit: It’s the boat that keeps sailing!
Valorkit: It’s the serial killer that keeps stabbing!

Mementokit: I hope you all make it to adulthood!
Laurelkit: That’s a great prayer.
Epochkit: A needed one.
Laurelkit: A needed one indeed.

Mementokit, dashing into the room: WHY AREN’T THE DISHES IN ALPHABETICAL ORDER?!
Epochkit: …What does that even mean?!